Coming out without
fear
I find myself
returning to the theme of living your own truth in terms of the things you
choose to do in your life and your relationships. I have many times celebrated
the coming out of people whilst also touching on other broader topics of
discussion on sexuality and expression, as the references show.
The most recent
coming out event was by Philip
Schofield about whom I have written an extensive but unpublished blog,
because the fire of my inspiration was first snuffed out and then, the season
for its revelation passed. A few days ago, I could have completed the blog, but
the whole exercise felt mechanical than inspired. It might yet be published
because there are issues, I discuss at length in it, I have persuaded myself it
would have a longer than usual incubation.
Gospels in sound and
vision
Having retrieved my
audio Bible collection from some old hard disks at the beginning of the week
and uploaded them to the cloud, as I was seeking something to watch on my
Amazon Fire TV Stick, I happened upon the dramatized Gospel of John which I
watched on Amazon Prime, but it is available on YouTube too. [The Gospel of John – YouTube]
As it transpired, I
then watched The Gospel of Matthew and a not particularly dramatic The Gospel
of Mark on YouTube. Next was the complete reading without an interval of The
Gospel of Mark at the St Paul’s Cathedral by Peter Suchet of Agatha Christie’s
Poirot fame, his opening remarks before his reading got me. [The Gospel According to Mark
read by David Suchet - YouTube]
My life includes my
partner
He was dedicating his
reading for which he was receiving no remuneration to a friend who had recently
passed on, Alec McCowen
who died at 91 a few months before. As I am wont to do, I immediately conducted
a search to appreciate this new piece of information. I did not know the actor who
appeared to have a large body of work, and was well respected in the acting
community that he was honoured with a memorial service at St. Paul's Church in
Covent Garden (known as "the actors' church"). This according to the
Wikipedia entry to his name.
The part to living
your own truth that appealed to me out of Alec McCowen’s biography was that he
had a partner Geoffrey
Burridge who he lost to complications due to AIDS in 1987. In 1989, he was
surprised with an appearance on This Is Your Life with
the consideration that he had refused to be featured on the show if his partner
of many years was not acknowledged. The dissatisfaction was assuaged with
voice-over in the closing titles making the relationship known.
Living your truth
regardless
I can say coming out
in the UK in the 1980s was sensational news, acknowledging a sexuality outside
the heteronormative construct could very well end careers, though there were
many personalities who were ready to walk that difficult road when others
stayed in the closet or contracted lavender marriages. To acknowledge your
partner died of AIDS at a time when effective treatments were still being trialled
but not definitely known to be as efficacious probably opened you to unmitigated
stigma and discrimination.
Alec McCowen was not
going to let the memory of his partner die away just because he was being given
a public platform on national television to showcase his life and his
achievements. This is where he earns my utmost respect, even though I am only
finding out about him 3 years after his death.
My life really
includes my partner
In my view, the
people we share life with must always have a say in things that pertain to us,
in our presence, in our absence, and in our passing. My relationship with Brian
Jenkins is developing, he is my boyfriend, my partner, my companion, and my
lover. My planning, thinking, and decisions are done with consideration to
consulting him, understanding how it affects him and obviously how it affects
us.
We have been going
out together for over a year and we hope to progress this to a formal
partnership at the right time. When in South Africa, he is my next of kin and
as he gets introduced to my wider family, friends and acquaintances, his
prominence in my life and my affairs should be without dispute along with his
primacy and involvement in matters that concern me.
I would expect as a consequence
that my achievements along with my love life are fully acknowledged without
hesitation, because that would be the heart of the matter or it has no heart
at all and it isn’t my story being told.
Like Alec McCowen, I
hope for a good innings and if I do end up with a Wikipedia page, the option
for Partner: must be filled in, and it is Brian Jenkins. Thank you, Brian, for
making me a very happy guy.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Comments are accepted if in context are polite and hopefully without expletives and should show a name, anonymous, would not do. Thanks.