Essential Snobbery 101: Sensible shoes for suffering soles

The shoo of the shoes

In one of those chance conversations, you have with friends, I was informed anecdotally that South Africans look at 3 things in an appearance to rate who you are in class, means, and facility. Your shoes, your watch, and your belt. I would suppose this applies primarily to men, and probably women are assessed on different criteria.

In that same conversation, I learnt that someone had gone to attend an interview and on the basis of the shoes and belt worn by the interviewer, the interviewee decided their interviewer was not of the means or mettle to employ them, and so declined the job offer.

Forced into acculturation

Obviously, one might suggest or opine that those appearances can be deceptive, that to judge ability or character by apparel or appearance is not only superficial but silly. Then again, we are products of influences, cultures, communities, and societies in which we live, and by that, might be unconsciously biased by irrational value systems that define status, when they should never be in consideration.

However, by reason of this somewhat unwritten rule, people adapt and try to play the part not so much to deceive, but to elevate the assessment from apparel or appearance to something more nuanced and probably indicative of the person and personality being engaged.

Then there are times when the application of this rule might be deleterious to the objective of being acceptable, where apparent ostentation and gaudiness might exude means but not class, for the quality of being presentable and yet understated is one that demands a finer educational process that comes with being quite comfortable in your own skin.

Good presentation is rarely exorbitant

In terms, you can wear sensible shoes that are clean and polished without them calling out like neon lights, and if you are not on a catwalk, your shoes are probably not the first thing you want to be noticed for. Likewise, the watch, for what is the point of wearing an expensive timepiece if you cannot keep the time? Whilst I am not suggesting one should plumb for the cheap, there is nothing wrong with adorning yourself with the affordable.

Then on the topic of sensible shoes, and I probably know a bit about that because my feet grew 6 sizes from the age of 7 to 15 and getting the right size of shoes after that was one of a bother, for size 12 (UK)/46 (EU) is not in the typically available or fashionable percentile.

There were times my poor feet were shoehorned in too-tight footwear; I learnt to wince in silence until I could throw off the shoes and walk barefoot. I have better options now, and I avail myself of them in good formal shoes and well-cushioned trainers that allow me to walk long distances without the aid of my walking cane.

Looking good for worse

One sight I cannot put out of my mind was one I saw last weekend, this lady stepped out of the hotel with her husband and a crutch in her right arm, a crutch, not a cane, and she was in high-heeled shoes. I could not fathom the spectacle of someone who needed a crutch and then was traipsing our uneven pavement in those kinds of shoes. I had a cartoon playback in my mind of someone falling so badly that the crutch would be replaced with either a wheelchair or a Zimmer frame.

She might have looked presentable at first sight, and yet it was meretricious; we, for the sake of fashion, sacrifice health and well-being. On the spectrum of opinion, the rating was indelibly low; you live and let live. The case for suffering soles in sensible shoes is made, but not many would heed the sensible part.

For those without a care

Then I found something

Out the apparent lack of inspiration for anything to write today, when one would have thought the expanse of it could easily provide myriad opportunities to craft the silly to the serious many times over, I found something to muse about.

My slow consumption of The Week magazines that I have on subscription yielded something of interest. That I am still 5 issues behind the current one should neither be a study on procrastination nor propriety. I am on retreat and so the shuffling through old magazines can be a leisurely act, as I am reading curated opinions and insights rather than the news.

In a lighter mood

The consumer page usually presents sections titled, ‘New cars: what the critics say’, with three reviews, ‘The best … any product, accessory, tool, or gadget of interest’, ‘Tips of the week …’, and ‘Where to find …’. Between the last two is the whimsical ‘And for those who have everything …’ which is everything you probably expect to it to be.

I guess it is written for those of a rather leisurely disposition without a care for the cares and concerns that dog everyday life. Though, I do wonder if this particular object of distraction and attraction will present a sense of welfare or safety for the time and times.

An illicit affair, maybe

We are presented with the Lady Arpels Pont des Amoureux Jour watch from the Love Stories collection of Van Cleef & Arpels French luxury outfit. The hand movement of the watch is unusual as it is a scene for a lovers’ rendezvous on a bridge, the gentleman dawdling as a minute-hand back and forth with the top of the hour at the middle of the bridge. The lady, however, takes her time as the hour hand arriving at a dalliance only at noon and midnight.

Bejewelled with precious stones, the function of time is lost to the extravagance of the setting, it might be both something exquisite as it can be quite vulgar. For those who normally can’t keep to time whilst wearing the most expensive watches, this is an opportunity to flash your wares in all its vanity for others to ogle either out of envy and the covetous need to acquire one to the detriment of all else or incredulity of wondering why anyone would deport that much to a vaunted trinket.

One would not in any case begrudge anyone who finds comportment in this choice of accessory or apparel, but an eye-watering £110,000 must come with adequate insurance and security without the possibility of flirting with your mistress on a bridge where the mysterious presages fearful consequences. Even if I had no care in the world, I doubt I would spend any time in this shop.

Opinion: Lagos to London: Britain’s New Super-Rich

And so

I really had no intention of writing anything about the mockumentary that was shown on Channel 4 last night titled, Lagos to London: Britain’s New Super-Rich, but I was asked about it at work this morning.

There are a lot of Nigerians in the UK, my association with the UK was borne of the fact that my parents were here as students in the 1960s and I came along, born in the UK, but of Nigerian heritage and I am proud of that mix and makeup of my life.

Now, the Nigerians that appeared on that programme are rich, wealthy, educated in some of the best English schools, but somehow seemed to have missed a quality of educational finesse that combines the understated with sophistication.

They had cash, they were brash, they had lots to flash and very little class. It goes without saying that that essential component of comportment seems to have evaded their sensibilities by a country mile.

Of sensible Nigerians

There are Nigerians who graft it here daily to make ends meet, there are other Nigerians who are professionals of high repute with exemplary accolades and dare I say, probably the majority of the unseen Nigerians have more sense than money and I think that is a good thing.

The best education I got from my parents is one of contentment, this gives me the perspective and grounding to live my life successfully and happily without the encumbrance of trying to keep up with the Joneses.

Looking at some of the commentary on Twitter last night, some people were carried away with the acquisitive hedonism, the ostentatious show of wealth that has people groomed for appearance with little or no substance. Life has a lot more to it than that.

Indeed, we would all love to have the means to do anything we liked, yet we have a self-awareness, a sense of responsibility, considerable consideration, discipline and perspective to what we do that is a function of our stability and salvation from depression borne of envy, jealousy or covetousness.

The butler comes

Now, of the people who were showcased on this meat rack of vulgarity, one can commend Alexander Amosu for rising from a council estate to hobnob with the outrageously rich and he has apparently cornered a market to feed the constant one-upmanship that consumes people of that ilk.

Yet, with all that association, the minutiae of essence that comes with knowing was evident, limousine, chauffeur, sharp suits, gleaming cuff links and the ultimate faux pas; a matching tie and pocket square. Class is probably passed down and there is only so much finishing school can do.

Kids on the skids

On the matter of the daughters of the billionaire oil tycoon and the twins with a law degree from some midrange university, whoever sent them to public school should be asking for a refund with interest, none of the English norms seemed to have rubbed off on them, they spoke like silver spoon braggarts.

Many of us would rather keep our inflective Nigerian-English accents than to decline to a South or East London accent, especially after that kind of education. Come think of it, I seem to have gotten more out of my Nigerian-based multi-cultural education than they did from public schools in England. Their spoken English was quite below par as to be somewhat appalling.

The Daily Mail had a spread on the girls and one look at the comments shows they would always be celebutantes of the Kardashian or The Only Way Is Essex genre of trashy reality television until they find a vocation that is of service rather than self-serving.

The twins who spewed philosophy like it was going out of fashion, were planning on making their mark as lawyers, I won’t scoff, but whilst they looked good for a posse, looks do not a respected advocate make. Much privilege and given to spoilage, one might aver.

Beyond the zoo

Like I said before, there are a lot of people of Nigerian heritage in the UK, very few of us would like to be paraded as vacuous showpieces of opulence bringing on disgust. It was a mockery of the uncultured without a filter for self-restraint.

They do not represent the, as it were, sensible Nigerian, not in any way. That show was a zoo and one visit to see the animals was enough.

Prince said it about style, there was much on show and nothing that resembled style.

Style is not something that comes in a bottle
Style is more like Jackie O. when she was doin' Aristotle
Style is not a logo that sticks 2 the roof of one's ass
Style is like a second cousin 2 class.

Style – Emancipation (1996) – Lyrics

Why Ask Why Do Poor People 'Waste' Money On Luxury Goods?

A very good question

From Facebook, I came upon this controversial headline, Why Do Poor People 'Waste' Money On Luxury Goods? It is in my view one of the best-written commentaries on the sociology of hedonism and consumption.

I will not attempt to rewrite the article here, I suggest you click on the link and read; however, there some interesting points that the person raised that are good for discourse.

Respecting others in how we present ourselves

The issue of balancing means with acquisition in pursuit of keeping up with the Joneses or putting up a façade is something I have opined about that I think plagues one of the cultures of my ancestry.

Besides, a very robust exchange on Twitter about appearance and respect went along the lines of a lady taking offence at being approached by a man in sagging trousers.

I could understand what she meant, I opined about how appearance is a function of comportment, and the way people might react to us.

Presentable is not exactly acceptable

In this, I see the conflict or the confusion between presentable and acceptable. The article takes a stab at it with this, “Presentable is the bare minimum of social civility. It means being clean, not smelling, wearing shirts and shoes for service and the like. Presentable as a sufficient condition for gainful, dignified work or successful social interactions is a privilege.”

“In contrast, ‘acceptable’ is about gaining access to a limited set of rewards granted upon group membership. I cannot know exactly how often my presentation of acceptable has helped me but I have enough feedback to know it is not inconsequential.”

I have found that there are elements of presentable that ease the way for being acceptable, but one should know the difference between sophisticated and ostentatious, just as the subtlety of understated compares to the vulgar to the Englishman in me.

I believe these matters of presentable and acceptable reach beyond goods and things to personality, the names we bear or the ones we dare to give our children, the way we engage friends and strangers, and it is a function of comportment.

Keeping up with the Joneses

However, we return to the question that highlights another aspect of character, the earn-and-spend culture that means we have nothing in store for the future and exemplified in the immediate gratification of acquiring for status instead of status being the determinant of acquisition.

None of which is entirely healthy regardless of status, if the need to have is to satisfy a vacuous want to be seen having something to be able to belong or show-off.

Yet, there is a market for this type of person because the virtue of contentment and the wisdom that informs better choices for deciding what is presentable and hopefully acceptable is different from what drives the acquisition of things.

What our presentable should do

What we do in striving for the presentable is to allow the gatekeepers open the doors to where we can be acceptable, it requires we either know the defaults of presentable or acquire the Shibboleth of acceptable.

This is quite different from self-aggrandisement, the luxury good from underwear through designer wear, accessories and expensive toys in the quest to belong. Thereby presenting a public face of plenty underpinned by a private penury.

Penny-wise, pound-foolish

We all have our stories, but I tried to sum it up in this tweet that I posted earlier, “The context of presentable and acceptable in terms of the decisions we make and how we spend can be the difference between foolish and wise.”

Back to the article, if you have not yet read it, Why Do Poor People 'Waste' Money On Luxury Goods? – A very good question with a long backstory.

Nigeria: The spectacular gospel of Mammon

To believe the unbelievable

It is difficult to appreciate the honest and truthful propagation of the gospel in Nigeria in the context of the unconventional places of worship called churches all around the place.

In a country where a majority are in thrall of the supernatural and bound by the incredulity of the superstitious, it would appear the religiously savvy have found a ready customer base and market for a set of products that range from a message, through the spectacular and a form of rampant hedonism sold off as signs of prosperity.

In a recently broadcast television documentary on Channel 4 in the UK, Seyi Rhodes in Unreported World reported on The Making Of … Nigeria’s Millionaire Preachers [1], showcasing the rather different Dr. Sign Fireman who unexpectedly appears rather casually than in the usual well-tailored suit.

The spectacle of enticement

A healthy sense of scepticism and discretion is required whilst viewing this show but the message is clear, dreadful seriousness envelops the congregation as exorcisms take place to amazement and incredulity, the supposedly possessed responding to commands like automatons until they are set free.

The earnest aspiration of most is for a prosperous life exemplified in materialistic shows of wealth as in the testimony of the pastor of a branch of Dr. Sign Fireman’s hydra-headed organisation called the Perfect Christianity Ministry whose rise from rags to untold riches included 3 cars, designer suits and gold wristwatches.

The message is no doubt perfect, it is about enticement as Dr. Fireman proffered at one of the lectures to his coterie of junior minister pastors of the branches, the packaging appears to be everything but the real essence of Christianity and as for if it is a ministry, it as much as ministers to some need.

Itching ears

In Apostle Paul’s second letter to Timothy, he identified that kind of ministry in these words, “For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. ” (NIV) II Tim 4:3 [2]

There is nothing wrong with the quest and desire for prosperity but that basic longing appears to have been hijacked and converted into the mantra of filthy lucre, all the words for gospel truth are used to present another gospel where Mammon is god and the worship is broadly entertainment.

This level of perversion might in the end begin a new type of Puritanism just as it proliferates splinter groups that call themselves churches all with the view of ministering to the needs of the people by first catering to the seemingly greedy machinations of the cult of personality that passes for presiding over a congregation.

Who are these people?

At the end of the documentary, you had to ask where Dr. Sign Fireman came from, what are his antecedents, what is his history and did he get his name by deed poll?

Beyond that, it is difficult to see the difference between the workings of the Italian mafia and these deceptively interesting church organisations with their heavies, entourages, security and “bling.”

As for yellow being all around the place, I am wont to believe it is more the homage to some Yellow god in some grotto yet to be accessed by civilisation than an affectation borne from childhood lending to the claim of being a yellow freak.

One must not however contemn those who have been caught by this spectacle, it serves a purpose almost as nefarious as it could be considered sinister but there is no scriptural foundation for the burial of Satan, no matter how contrived the interpretation offered to loosen the purse strings of the sad to say seriously taken and gullible lot that participated in this travesty.

Sources

[1] 4oD – Channel 4 – Unreported World - The Making Of … Nigeria’s Millionaire Preachers

[2] Bible.cc – II Timothy 4:3