Sunday 14 November 2021

Talking of natural attraction

Just a natural attraction

Sometimes, you find that you are conditioned by a heteronormative world, and that forms the perspective from which you see things especially in the areas of interest and attraction. Yet, you are informed by difference, a situation that suggests you are predisposed to something different.

Stepping out this morning, I thought about my affinity for a type of male form that is irresistibly attractive and alluring. This is something I have felt from as far back as when I was 7 years old. I remember that feeling washed through me as I watched a slightly older neighbourhood friend of ours come to play with his siblings at my home.

Growing to accept myself

Nothing happened between us, but I can say about myself that this was not some sort of aberration or deviancy, it was a naturally unexplained tendency that I have processed since then and eventually come to terms with. That it has a name, or a label is beside the point. We are who we are seeking to first accept ourselves and hopefully be accepted for who we are and not be judged for being that.

Then, there are places where this is not accepted even though humanity has always been represented in commonality as much as difference and diversity if we are to allow for that simplicity without the issues of influence by belief systems, prejudices, conservatism, or anything that seeks to set others apart for no other reason than they are to any degree different.

To marriage we go

We all desire some sort of companionship, in the general sense and in the particular. The former would comprise people we meet as acquaintances, friends, colleagues, or even strangers, maybe just being in a crowd. In the latter, we might start with family, to relations, extending to community and then one person with whom we desire to be intimate and with whom we share much more than with others.

The heteronormative is a construct that appears to be underpinned by statute that is changing in many dominions to accommodate a broader view of people we choose to partner with and make known that they have become our significant other, in deed first, and then by law. It is going to happen more with people, marriage, regardless of pairing. I have found someone with whom that matters more than anything. It is Brian.

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