Thought Picnic: Of restaurants that upset the peace of the belly

Service matters

I am usually one to sing the praises of a restaurant if I both enjoyed my meal and the service both of which are very important to me regardless of cost.

Where the meal has been very good and the service leaving much to be desired, in fact, to be honest, the service for me is part of the meal, it is the spice, enhancing the aroma, giving the right ambience making it all worthwhile.

Paris is somewhat known for atrociously rude waiters, they have their moods but for me, many things are evident, I walked into the restaurant of my own volition and I am paying; it means I will not take aggro with my food and I can so easily drop my napkin on the table and walk out.

I once called a French waiter aside and told him, “If you are not happy with us being here, we’ll leave, we don’t take aggro with our food and honestly, I don’t care for his manner.”

I can be generous but do not create an atmosphere where the only tip you get is best for the tip, my leftovers after I could stomach no more.

Wait a bit before praise

Last weekend, we searched out a nice Brazilian restaurant in the West-End, good food, good music, an ethnic feel and amazing company, however, before I could get to my keyboard to write about it, having all decided we will all return at a later date, I was already feeling queasy and queer with the evidence of an unfortunate mishap, by the morning, everyone had a story – we know that only the bravest of the most foolhardy of us will return for second helpings of that experience.

Now, one can only imagine the glee of those who might just have secured a table at Copenhagen’s Noma which gastronomic buffs have awarded the superfluous, if not hoity-toity title of the World’s Best Restaurant for three years running.

That far North?

Denmark? It does beggar belief to me because I belong to the school of thought that the further away you are from the equator the less bright colours your local food has, something to do with nature, weather and local agriculture – but now the world is a much smaller place than when spices travelled by clipper from the East Indies, you can find global foods anywhere there is means to convey its freshness or preserved state to some other place.

In any case, having ate, drank and been merry, 67 out of 78 patrons that flaunted their bookings apparently either saw their meals again or had it run out of them with great discomfort, they had picked up the Norovirus in the world’s best restaurant, one can only think that the meal would have been as memorable as it would have been forgettable – what an experience.

What goes out came in

The Norovirus could well be unpalatably referred to as the shit-virus, at the great risk of being crude, it derives from faecal matter – perish the thought, you say – there? Yes, even best restaurants are, well...

To compound the matter, the visit of the authorities into the kitchen and the office showed a number of hygiene shortcomings and probably an apparent lack of responsiveness to complaining customers due to the hubris of status – the restaurant is too busy being the best that it conveniently delivered the worst after-dinner experience to the diners – any wise setup will quickly bake and eat humble pie and keep a very low profile on being the best at delivering strange food and not being concerned about it.

Beware that your great repute does not leave you less caring about the smallest things that can bring great grief to more than one.

Nigeria: Compounding our National Awards with Shame and Disgrace

An instrument of patronage

The Nigerian National Honour Awards 2010/2011 season over the last couple of weeks became a hot topic with international dimensions that now requires a review because it brought to the fore some serious issues about Nigeria.

The first controversy that arose came from the House of Representatives Minority Leader Honourable Femi Gbajabiamila when he rejected the offer [1] of the Order of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (OFR).

In discussions that ensued on social media forums, many were quick to question his motives being a member of the opposition ACN party, that is powerful in the South-West of Nigeria, it is however sad that the political landscape of Nigeria is so tainted that politicians with seemingly altruistic ideals get lumped together with the political benchwarmers and jobbers that constitute the rent-seeking class of leeches inimical to progress in Nigeria.

However, it is sometimes important to separate the message from the messenger and sieve the message for the gems whilst discarding the dirt; at least that seems to be the only way to gain insight into the workings of Nigeria.

Mr Gbajamiabila in his letter of rejection opined that the awards process had been abused, the bill he sponsored to review the process did not get sufficient parliamentary time and that the awards should reflect incontrovertible meritorious service rather than it being used as a vehicle of presidential patronage. “This has reduced what otherwise was a well-intended and noble idea to a national joke.” He said, and many would agree.

Things still falling apart

Soon afterwards, the highly esteemed Chinua Achebe rejected the offer [2] of Commander of the Order of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (CFR) which he had once rejected before in 2004. Uncharitably, one can say the government was lacking in imagination in offering the same title rejected 7 years before as if the awardee had not distinguished themselves the more since the first rejection.

Paying back the government in the hand he was dealt, Professor Achebe contended the issues he raised on his first rejection were still present, unaddressed and unresolved. His rejection lit up the international newswires as he is literally the foremost African literary luminary; known for especially for his 1958 novel, Things Fall Apart.

Again, on social media forums, the discussion was quite divided as some were livid with rage at the professor whilst others could recognise the views expressed by him but the most important reaction to his rejection [3] came from the Nigerian Presidency.

Having had their gift horse rejected, they proceeded to damn the man with praise making a clear inference that Professor Achebe was oblivious of the great changes that have taken place in Nigeria; citing the elections which in general appeared free and fair but in all fairness and honesty, those elections whilst appearing to be the best ever held did not mean they were the best that could be held. The government could not point to any other amazingly inspiring changes that could have persuaded the professor to reconsider his views. Meanwhile, one must note that the professor was already an OFR.

Records of degeneration

The Presidency might have been given the benefit of the doubt with regards to a Minority Leader or a Professor in exile but back in Nigeria was Professor Grace Alele-Williams who was the first female Vice Chancellor of a major university in Sub-Saharan Africa.

In her case, her rejection or rather consternation [4] was piqued by the fact that she was being awarded a national honour she had already received 10 years before; she was awarded an OFR.

It goes without saying that there will be a general consensus to honour Professor Alele-Williams again with a higher award and she did not mince her words excoriating the system that allowed for what one should term an unforgivable error.

In what should be Nigeria’s premier award scheme, one would have thought the best brains would apply all due diligence and meticulousness in selecting the awardees, researching their history and sounding them out before making public their decisions.

Professor Alele-Williams had the following to say, “This says a lot about record keeping in this country and it is disheartening to see the country we strove to build degenerate to such level.” And she then went on to, “enjoined Nigerians to collectively stand up to the cankerworm of corruption, which has eaten deep into the fabrics (sic) of the nation.”

Comparing what Professor Achebe abroad said about there being no change in the last 7 years and what Professor Alele-Williams in Nigeria said about degeneration measured over presumably 10 years or more, you might be persuaded more of the opinions of the professors about Nigeria than what appears to be the fallacy of the Presidency – but maybe that is just an opinion too.

A really dull speech

So, Monday the 14^th of November was the day of the investiture in which 355 “esteemed” Nigerians - taking cognisance of Mr Gbajamiabila’s objections were – honoured.

President Goodluck Jonathan gave a long and almost rambling speech [5], @jongambrellAP live-tweeted the speech which included trivia like, “I am informed that since the inception of the Award Scheme in 1963, a total of 3,924 persons have received National Honours.”

I got so exasperated that I tweeted, “Who writes these President Goodluck Jonathan speeches? They are so uninspiringly pedestrian as a catalyst for terminal depression.” That got retweeted another 19 times indicating there was probably some agreement with that view.

Deviating from his prepared speech, the President from paragraph 24 of the published text took time to educate us in the nomination process noting that very young people were confused about the awards system and even dared compare the National Awards Committee with the Norwegian Nobel Committee that awards the Nobel Peace Prize whilst also differentiating the Nigerian National Honours Award from the Nigerian National Merit Award. The President should have kept to the script, in my humble opinion; a lacklustre prepared speech embellished with uncharismatic ad-libbing makes for an even duller presentation.

A kakistocracy of incompetence

As if that was not bad enough, the President ran out of medals [6] to present the awardees, some tweets suggested they were more than 50% short and like the professors and the legislator had said, there has been no improvement considering the same President was embarrassed last year for the lack of medals [7] to award some of the present awardees during the even more auspicious 50^th Independence anniversary of Nigeria.

Though the Secretary to the Federal Government spared the President some embarrassment it was just as embarrassing that knowing there were so many recipients, not enough planning and preparation went into ensuring that the occasion was as auspicious for the awardees, not to talk of the international community present to witness another unpalatable narrative of Nigeria in transformation.

We cannot continue to excuse and tolerate the rank incompetence that permeates every sector of our society that the organisation of such a premier event honouring the best and most lauded of Nigerians in the eyes of the government be served with breath-taking cack-handedness that will sap even the most optimistic Nigerian of hope for progressive change, whilst adding grist to the mill of the critics, but the government and its organs are justifiably deserving of scorn and excoriation for this debacle and show of shame.

In the end, history appears to have already sided with Honourable Femi Gbajabiamila, Professor Chinua Achebe and Professor Grace Alele-Williams; we Nigerians are once again caught in the merciless iron grip of a heartless and unconscionable kakistocracy – a government indeed by the worst of men.

Sources

[1] House of Reps Gbajabiamila, Minority Leader rejects national award | Transparency for Nigeria

[2] Chinua Achebe rejects an honor from Nigeria - CSMonitor.com

[3] Achebe’s rejection of national honour regrettable | Nigerian Presidency

[4] National Mirror - National award: I’ve an OFR already –Alele-Williams

[5] President Jonathan’s address at the 2010/2011 National Honours Award investiture ceremony

[6] Insufficient Medals as President Jonathan Decorates Nigerians at National Awards - Nigeria Business News

[7] The Nation - Shortage of medals mars national award ceremony

Nigeria: The NEXT awards expose an unconscionable kakistocracy

Our pride

It is always heartening to read of Nigerians winning awards or receiving international recognition for their work most especially if they are resident in Nigeria.

At the best of times, it is not the easiest country to set up business in and going from the experience of some, it is even harder to be a newspaper and a quality newspaper at that.

A few weeks ago, we were informed that the NEXT newspaper will no more appear in print, many lamented the prospect whilst opining about the course that newspaper charted that made it a pariah to advertising agencies thereby starving it of essential revenue to thrive.

NEXT was the best

This blog is not being written as an exegesis to those failings; those issues are for others to ponder. However, accolades have been raining on the newspaper like Noah’s flood; last week, Dele Olojede the founder won [1] the 4^th John P. McNulty Prize and the citation read “in recognition of his ground breaking work to deliver unbiased information to the Nigerian public, demand government transparency and advance journalistic standards in the country.”

On Tuesday, at the FAIR [2] (Forum for African Investigative Reporters) African Investigative Journalism Awards in Johannesburg, South Africa, NEXT reporters Peter Nkanga and Idris Akinbajo emerged as African Investigative Reporters of the Year for their joint work, entitled “Last Minutes Oil Deal that Cost Nigeria Dear” whilst the editor Musikilu Mojeed carted away the Courage Award.

Courage in the abyss

It is important to recount the citations that accompany these awards; in the case of the reporters, “The report is one of the six-part ground-breaking series which catalogued a courageous journey into our heart of darkness, the oil industry, as we investigate brazen attempts by our senior officials, including petroleum minister, Diezani Alison-Madueke, to corner the oil industry for themselves, openly demanding bribes, and using cronies and fronts to grab oil blocs in secretive deals.”

Having compiled their report, it was left to the editor to weigh the consequences of the age-old saying, “publish and be damned,” he courageously published the report and for that he “was honoured for demonstrating rare courage and providing the right kind of leadership to get the stories published in spite of high-level pressures, police harassment, attempted monetary inducement and threats to his life.”

They never cared for corruption

From the analysis that followed awarding these prizes to the now eminent personnel of NEXT, it was suggested that in any other country less corrupt and less tolerant of malfeasance, prebendalism or neopatrimonialism, the minister will not only have lost her job in disgrace, she would duly have lost her freedom too, having to go to jail.

Sadly, it is Nigeria where with all the incontrovertible facts and evidence presented to all that matter, the President with his transformational agenda re-nominated the minister for her old position after the elections and the Nigerian Senate being derelict, irresponsible and nonchalant about these rotten allegations barely questioned her but ratified her appointment thereby granting a seal of approval to a corrupt enterprise that reeked to the high heavens.

The award corroborates the reports

Now, there is no reason for FAIR to wade into the political quagmire of Nigeria and expose the sows with their snouts deep in the trough of corruption, they could easily have adopted other less politically inflammatory pieces to grant their award.

Each entry would have been judged on more than its merits for good reporting but would have been reviewed against the kinds of pressures militating against such activity being exposed to public knowledge.

It automatically lends a lie to the idea that everything that constitutes this government we now have in Nigeria with the majority PDP ruling party have a desire to tackle corruption at any level. They instigate, promote, espouse and embrace corruption as their modus operandi suborning as many as can be bought to that same cause.

They are a corrupt lot

Where the President might have had the backbone to stem the tide at the top, he acquiesced and celebrated the epitome of corruption as the lifeblood of his regime and in swearing-in the minister gave license to impunity, the minister probably continuing from where she left off knowing nothing will come of the investigations of the puny inconsequential reporters of the moribund NEXT newspaper stable.

With this award, one will hope the whole Corrupted Industrial Complex (CIC) that makes up the totality of the Federal Government of Nigeria is duly exposed to the world and our foreign partners that they have no consideration for good governance, probity or transparency and sadly, Nigerians thinking they have a democracy are in fact, caught in the merciless iron grip of a heartless and unconscionable kakistocracy – a government by the worst of men.

For the salvation of Nigeria – woe betide them all.

Sources

[1] 234Next.com | Olojede wins John P. McNulty Prize

[2] 234Next.com | NEXT editor, two reporters win African investigative journalism awards

[3] 234Next.com | Last minute oil deals that cost Nigeria dear

Triple O is 2011 MOBO Award Best Gospel Act

He won

I guess it is only right to provide an update; I wrote about my nephew TripleO who was nominated for a MOBO Best Gospel Act award some weeks ago in Triple O - MOBO Awards Best Gospel Act Nominee

This evening in Glasgow, the awards took place and he walked away with the prize, he is the 2011 MOBO Award Best Gospel Act [News story with list of winners] and I am utterly chuffed as I offer my congratulations on his winning which by God’s grace should be the first of many in what we pray will be a long, fruitful and productive career of genius, talent and amazing ability.

In all, I want to thank all those that were inspired to vote for him having read about him on my blog and without crowding out this blog with too much than the announcement, you can view the YouTube Channel for his material, buy his music on iTunes or Amazon and visit his website at http://www.tripleouk.com/

Thank you!

Triple O - MOBO Awards Best Gospel Act Nominee

Triple O - The talent

One must not miss the opportunity to talk about one’s own by expressing both pride and praise because it is just proper, right and good.

Triple O as he is known to his fans by reason of the fact that all his names start with O signifying original, one and only with individuality, genius, ability and intellect is the gospel artiste son of my “sister”, strictly my closest first cousin but relationships make for associations closer than that kind of formality; he is essentially my nephew.

He specialises in a genre called Gospel Grime - a blend of hip-hop and rap music with strong gospel inspired lyrics to which for generational reasons on my part requires I listen with subtitles but it is growing on me and I am getting better attuned to it, certain musical forms are acquired tastes over time.

MOBO - Best Gospel Act nomination

Performing for the past 8 or so years, he has a YouTube Channel of his music and more concerning his activities where you can get a general idea and good feel of his music.

He released his album Flatline on the 11^th of July 2011 and it is available on iTunes and Amazon – where you can sample tracks on the album and you should not forget to buy the album too. Thank you.

Buy, listen and vote

For the album, he has received deserved recognition and has been nominated for the MOBO Awards – Best Gospel Act 2011- and what is required to come tops is to vote for Triple O on the MOBO Awards Best Gospel Act page, this requires a simple registration exercise before voting, and here you can listen to the radio advert for his MOBO nomination.

Review: UKGospel.com - Music Review: Triple O - 24 - Flatline (Album - July, 2011)

I am exceedingly proud of my nephew and after listening to his music I am sure you need no further persuasion to cast your vote for his nomination towards winning the prize.

Vote on the MOBO Awards Best Gospel Act page – Thank you.

Some other background - Triple O Interview on UKGospel.com in 2007

Blog the New Year

Thanks for it all

As usual my religious background contends that at the New Year one gives thanks for the opportunity to see another year.

Seeing all the perils that have befallen many over the last year and the circumstances in which one has escaped or been protected from the lot can only create a thankful disposition for being spared.

Knowing that there is a greater One beyond us with whom all things consist makes all that difference if thanks are muttered or shouted out loud in the assumed hysteria of gushing and heartfelt thanks.

One is thankful, for some many things, the possibilities for mishap, misfortune, accidents and bad luck abounded, but one has seen good health, prosperity through the mercy of God and His abundant grace.

There have been times that one has wondered how each day has passed into history offering new opportunities for hope and privilege. How the past with its lessons have provided useful insight for the future that promises great change and scope to remain relevant and thanks remain a constant feature.

The New Year is another opportunity; a leap year is a greater opportunity. One should also remember that on February the 29th an ex-boss turns 10 - bless him.

The thankless "representatives"

In the UK, the Queen offers honours to citizens of the Commonwealth for their services to their communities or other spheres of influence that they command.

It is commendable that there are societies where people are honoured just as a recognition of their work or status.

There is no doubt that the award system have by and large been abused, but that is the substance of privilege.

Like it or not, every endeavour of life is subject to varying degrees of validation scrutiny and a reward system serves to quantify that validation process.

In schools it is exams and the individual's success that defines abilities, in business knowing a product that the customer wants and then offering it the way the customer wants creates value and profit.

In every other undertaking there is recognition of the successful, the average and the failing. The ability for people to transcend these validation processes represents that person’s response to change and ability to change.

Monarchy

We are a constitutional monarchy in the UK but the real governmental power is vested in the House of Commons with the House of Lords being the revising chamber.

It is unfortunate that both the monarchy and the House of Lords are undergoing so much reform when it is the House of Commons that needs the most reform.

The democratic institutions in the UK offer platforms to three parties and rarely meritocratic opportunity to independents.

Once the election is over, constituency representation is at a lower priority to party politics and policies that do not necessarily reflect the electorates' interests.

We are a monarchy anyhow and we just have to live with it till the electorate decides for a republic.

There is no doubt that if the head of our political process is a jousting dandy politician rather than the aloof Queen, the value of that representation would diminish into the interest serving system we recognise in countries like the United States.

A political and governmental system requires a wise figure-head like a monarch representing our heritage or an apolitical president like those of Germany or Italy.

Awards

The news has been awash with information of certain individuals who have been honoured but have rejected the honours for whatever reasons.

This brings to the fore a classic example of people who are representative of a self-serving lower esteem class of people who are still in the throes of integration even after three generations in the UK.

One is glad that being born in England, one grew up in Africa where one's race had never been an issue. Escaping the race and deprivation politics of the 70s and 80s has done one a whole world of good. It helps one realise that racism and its effects are a thing of the mind and self-realisation.

Where that aspect of esteem is resolved, there is no need to herald one's race or suffer the unnecessary taunts of rude inference masquerading as light hearted jokes.

One sees that having a quick wit so easily puts paid to those things. Illustrated in a few examples below:

Internet Chat setting.

Q: Do you Africans still live on trees?

A little research reveals that the inquirer is from Sweden, so obtain the full title of the King of Sweden.

A: Yes indeed we do, in fact, when King Carl XVI Gustaf visited, we put him on the tallest tree and fed him bananas.

The shock expressed by the inquirer after that most definitely extracted more than an apology. That one had inferred that his king was a monkey was just desserts be trying to be too smart.

A conversation at work.

Person: Akin, the guy you borrowed your suit from wants it back.

The person happens to have some envelopes on him.

Answer: I see you have a delivery service, would you take it back?

One never heard such smart jokes from the person again. Others within earshot also learnt not to mess around with such issues.

Take the honours and inspire others

Conversely, those issues represent a situation of unparalleled rudeness, literally unbelievable and supposed to upset you seriously.

One could have viewed them as the vituperative insults that they were and launched a whole racism complaint process for the crowds to latch onto. No, when one is self assured, you give as good as you get and even better.

About the awards, they represent nothing but recognition, they do not even come with a prize as with the Nobel Prize.

Every well mannered individual would accept the honours with thanks and still continue in the work that was recognised in the presentation of that honour.

However, if the activity being honoured has not been resolved with sincerity in the hearts and minds of the recipient, the urge to reject becomes compelling.

It is a great disservice however to the others who have integrated into the society they find themselves, who's contributions are worthy of recognition but are not recognise because of the selfish leftwing agendas of the refuseniks.

Once again, we are a constitutional monarchy, honours and recognition of service will still be offered and presented by the monarch till we become a republic. The republic would not make it to the radar screens for generations.

I say, "Take the honours and inspire others".