Cape Town reflections: The sexy things we failed to do

The sun

Leaving the chill of Manchester to the warmth of Cape Town via Paris was one trip I was so looking forward to for almost a year. It was almost scuppered with the advent of the Omicron variant when the Southern states of Africa were put on the red list. Were it not for the fact that I was spending 6 weeks away and travelling through France, I would have had to cancel my trip.

I love the sun and make the most of taking in the sun, as you would regularly see me in shorts, with a half-unbuttoned short sleeve shirt, a seagrass or straw hat, lots of water to drink, walking more than taking a ride to the Victoria & Alfred Waterfront or going to Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens.

Obviously, there are times when I need the shade, some shelter from the direct heat or to cool off from the warmth. It is strange that of the things we used to do so often in Cape Town and in Johannesburg, we never visited Häagen-Dazs for ice cream, but Christmas in the sun can never be beaten.

The sand

Probably everywhere we could do was green, with grass or other exotic plant life, the sand could probably be found in the dunes that we once tried to visit but the trip was cancelled. The tourist activity now boasts electric bicycles or buggies, it is not what I would feel that confident to do.

Another good view of the sand can be seen from paragliding and there are many who go tandem paragliding from Signal Hill to the fields of Sea Point between the main road and the promenade. Much as Brian would threaten for us to paragliding, I know it would near happen with his vertigo and fear of heights, to get him on the balcony takes much Dutch courage, I was surprised when he offered that we go on the waterfront Ferris wheel after my birthday dinner.

Sometimes, we go to Camps Bay and walk on the beach, though when we went to the Victoria Bay Beach near George, it was windy with ferocious white horses, anything but beach weather. Then we missed out on a place we do love to visit using the City Sightseeing tour bus, Hout Bay where we could walk in the sand, though we have not.

The sea

I suppose we now gravitate towards staying near the sea with easy access to the V & A Waterfront, we are surrounded by water with much to see. The marina there is occupied with idle yachts, probably a few get to wield their sails if ever, more they move under motor power.

The fascination is rarely with the boats but the seals basking in the sun or popping out of the water, beyond that it is the draw bridge or the swing bridge that lets the boats out and cuts off passage to the jutting out landscape of the waterfront and the quays.

For one, we took an apartment with no obstructive views of the sea where ghost ships might have cruised at unbelievable knots of speed, but the more glorious view was when MSC Orchestra came into Cape Town and could not be moored because of the wind, so it loitered in the bay. What it also heralded was the idea that the pandemic was being put behind us and what a crowd of passengers we saw trying to board when you saw her close by, at the passenger’s terminal.

I did not get my feet wet, not once. How could I have had the pleasure of sun, sand, sea, and sex, in Cape Town but missed out on ample opportunity to take advantage and commit to memory the amazing things to cherish. We love Cape Town.

Beyond the fallacy of solitude

At one in two

Sometimes, I just want to be left alone, left to my own thoughts to be by myself. I know this desire is a difficult one especially when in a close relationship. It is a process of reconditioning and adaptation that is not easy but necessary when thinking and acting for two.

Your thoughts and moods are not as personal or private as they once were. Any apparent change in attitude, demeanour, or responsiveness is immediately noticed as you run a barrage of enquiries and questions as to how you feel or what might be wrong with you, with them, or between you both when there really is nothing the matter at all.

Unfortunately, there is never a satisfactory answer to the many questions to which there is an implicit demand for a suitable, adequate, and proper explanation, or it presents a vector of possible conflict. How do you explain when you just feel unperturbed and meh?

Solitude and expression

Then, I guess the concept of solitude is an often-misunderstood subject about individuality, the idea of space and the cultural dimensions that might pertain to it. My blog is both a public journal and a conservatory of thinking that frequently has too much read into what is written. Whereas its fundamental purpose is a forum to document and develop thoughts for possible discussion.

I fear that when my blog is read in this way, it would begin to arrest expression leading to self-censorship and the loss of an outlet for my own catharsis, that is something I would hate to happen on my blog. Its free format for expression and introspection is valuable and useful, retaining this space for it matters much.

Person and personable

Indeed, I am a social being, I love company, companionship, and my relationship, but not to the extent of feeling like one part of conjoined twins fused together at some part of our bodies. By nature, I am also introverted, I do not function well in crowds. Heck! I went to bed early leaving guests to my birthday celebration partying.

This is same person who appears to easily strike up conversations with strangers. There are many facets to personality and individuality, I can be a hermit easily forgoing any human intervention cooped up in my apartment for up to a week without it bothering me, it suits my temperament.

However, the joy, security, and stability of having someone to love, and lean on, is priceless. I cherish it, I honour it, I will continue to nurture it and build it into an enduring treasure of life, may it prosper and grow, I love you, Brian.

Stuck on unpacked

Stood still at stop

Three weeks after returning from Cape Town, I cannot say I have settled down or acclimatised in any way. The four suitcases that I brought back from my travels remain unpacked in my living room as my mind is already contemplating the next time I can be out there again to be with my fiancé.

The weather here at home, though mild has taken a turn for the dreadfully depressing worse, as it is getting colder and taking on the characteristically disreputable signature of rainy Manchester. Good for farmers and no one else.

As I look for sorts of distraction that I have not quite found in enthusiasm at work, I have been baking bread modifying the recipes to get better outcomes, though I should extend my baking repertoire to attempting other exciting baked goods.

Urge for a surge

My truth-telling weighing scales displays numbers that has me looking for consistently sure ways of shedding the pounds and keeping that bulk off without having to radically change my diet. Beyond that trouble is the need for a kickstart of engagement, something that reignites the quest, the curiosity, and the joy of learning that I cannot seem to begin to interest myself with any aplomb. It requires discipline and consistency as much as I need to be enthused.

Brian is my constant source of encouragement and light as Kola is the most unstinting confidante, I know it would all come good. I just need to weather the storm.

Thought Picnic: To the little things we do

A lonely lane of travel

There are days when there is no agenda even if there is a purpose, the desire to impact that might not be as impactful, the consideration of others generally unnoticed by them, the urge to be an example without being exemplary, just having the time, the place, and the opportunity to be the best one can be.

Amongst people lauded for great achievements, too often it is easy to feel quite a minnow, and then you realise your world, whether large or small is the community in which you might have some influence or modicum of significance, the risk of belittling self is too frequently borne of ignorance of what little you seem to be doing is significant and important to others.

Knowing the little you can do

To be aware to the point of not beating yourself up for what you have unfortunately not done where there are things done and other things you have the capacity, ability, and opportunity to is the beginning of knowledge and the elimination of unnecessary stress.

In my life, I always hope to have the means to meet every challenge in any sphere of encounter and demand. I extend myself as much I can do, there is little reward for these things, and gratitude comes in ways unexpected and appreciated. If through one thing I have been given the blessing to do, I have changed one life for the better, we would celebrate that against the many odds we have faced.

The spirit of Viagra moved upon the waters

Executive direction (ED) of purpose

For particularly medical reasons, I have never considered the use of Viagra, and this is because of the apparent side effects that greeted its advent on the scene almost a quarter of a century ago.

Besides, on the wide spectrum of erectile dysfunction, there would be no need for it except for recreational purposes and I have had encounters with certain who have required medical attention for painful priapism, and I doubt they have summoned up the courage to tell of their ordeal in jest even after a decade of their somewhat embarrassing experience.

The rise of watery things

However, my eyes fell on this tale at the weekend, and it deserves some commentary, for the story suggests that the drinking water at a church in Kenya was laced with Viagra which led to the arousal of all male members in the church and some attempting to exploit their situation fully in harassing female members of the congregation. [The World News: Kenyan Police Hunting For 19-Year-Old Girl Suspected Of Adding Viagra In A Church Water Tank]

I am quite amused that all 17 male members in the church drank the water in sufficient quantities before the service to all be aroused literally at the same time, it almost feels like the water was fed to a trough and snouts sunk in to take their fill, maybe an affliction of thirst befell them all at once, or someone received the revelation that the water now had the properties of the biblical Pool of Bethesda where the first who got in was healed and for this church in Taita Taveta County all male members rose to an occasion they had not been invited to.

Men seeking a Jezebel

Taita Taveta County is far enough from the major Kenyan cities of Mombasa or Nairobi, that one might think that kind of excitement in the congregation is rapturous and calling for orgasmic ululation, but we would be quite ahead of ourselves because it is not clear from the story that the water was tested to determine if it was indeed laced with Viagra or some other Sildenafil compound.

Meanwhile, the police are after a suspect, Tracey Fadhili, 19, who apparently lives near the church and was seen at the church compound the previous evening, but this does not suggest she was the culprit. I would not want to cast aspersions on the investigative competence of the rural police force, I, however, have my doubts that she was responsible for this situation. It begs the question of why she would lace the water storage with Viagra and to what end? As there is no other backstory on her, one can only wonder. They found a Jezebel to castigate.

Send them home for it

Adding to my amusement is the idea that this free blessing of manhood excitation is considered shocking. Involuntary as the response might have been, it can hardly be considered shocking for it might well be a miraculous manifestation for those who had given up on believing Lazarus could rise again. What I would not accept is the idea that the use of Viagra makes you lecherous that there is literally no self-control and the aroused seeks to mate with the next available female they cast their lascivious eyes on. Does the church even believe in miracles anymore?

Furthermore, a male organ erection is not a weird feeling, that it happened during a church service, unfortunate as it might seem, is not against nature or the expression of self, weirder things have happened to men and this, I can assure you is not one of them.

If the pastor were at any time inspired and directed, he would have come to one useful realisation, closed the service, blessed the congregation, and encouraged the men to go home to their wives and girlfriends with the word that of hope, faith and love that endure, love is the greatest of all, and when boosted by the ramifications of Viagra, you make for a happier church. What more can we ask for? Leave Tracey Fadhili alone, she did no wrong.

Face masks should not be political

From a brother to all

After the Sung Eucharist on Sunday, the Dean of the cathedral before dismissing the congregation advised that we should all attend church wearing face masks, despite the relaxation of requirements and guidelines by the government. He said it would be a preference for our safety to wear face masks, and though he would not throw anyone out of the cathedral for not wearing one, we are in a community where we are each other’s brother’s keeper.

Much as there is much science, disputing, disagreement and clamour about the safety or protection a face mask confers, it is not perfect, but the consensus is that sort of face-covering provides some protection.

Mzansi doing better

I have been in South Africa at the height of the pandemic when there was a highly transmissible variant at a time when there was no vaccine and recently in the advent of another variant where there is a vaccine available.

South Africans appear to adhere to a higher standard of consideration and safety than I have ever witnessed in England. Many wear face masks when outdoors, before we access any public premises especially in the hospitality or commercial sector, there is a hand sanitising device at the entrance, probably someone would take your temperature and some places would take your telephone number for test and trace purposes.

All precautions matter

It is sad that the matter of face masks has been politicised, in the quest for individuality and liberty at the expense of community and consideration for others that we do each other more unnecessary harm. In addition, I avoid crowds and enclosed places, social distancing matters and as I am in the cohort of the vulnerable, I do not need to attend office premises, I can continue to work from home.

That I am fully vaccinated with a booster gives me a good fighting chance if I do contract the Coronavirus, but I am not because of those precautions going to throw caution to the wind and face the virus head-on in some fortuitous daring-do, the face mask is a temporary inconvenience as much as it is a practical, though imperfect screen from directly inhaling contaminated particles from the asymptomatic.

They carelessly endanger others

One can only wonder how dreadful it must be that yesterday evening Liz Truss, Secretary of State for Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Affairs of the United Kingdom, was in the House of Commons amongst her colleagues on the front bench without a face mask, only to announce a few hours later that she had tested positive for COVID-19 and she has to self-isolate at home when she was scheduled to be off on a diplomatic mission to Ukraine.

Whilst I am not alluding to anything about the benefit or otherwise of face masks in that particular scenario, the exhalation of viral droplets in her asymptomatic seating could quite well have endangered and subjected some of those sitting nearest to her to contracting the virus. Even if they are fine, they probably need to test themselves just to remove the anxiety of taking ill. The fact that many symptoms are mild does not preclude the life-threatening nature of COVID-19.

Let’s keep safe

It is important that we return to viewing the face mask as a public health issue, a community matter and with the consideration of being our brothers’ keeper, it needs to be depoliticised and removed from the canon of dogmatic libertarian ideals of individualism to the detriment of common purpose and society.

People have needlessly died taking unreasonable positions during this pandemic, there might be no statistics for those who never contracted the Coronavirus at all, nothing wrong in not being counted if with all precautions you have been spared the fate of an unpredictable encounter with the Coronavirus.

Please, stay safe and do everything to help put this pandemic behind us. Thank you.

Coronavirus streets in the year of the tiger - LIX

Decorations for the moon

Soon after work, I was out on my usual, yet irregular walking route and up a certain street into a particular neighbourhood were red lantern decorations strewn from lamppost to lamppost over the road but blown about and out of arrangement by the wind that they bunched up into groups of 5 not in the way the decorators might have intended.

Only two years before, as I walked up the street, I had a kind of foreboding that the plague that started somewhere might be brought to our doorstep, and this was well over a month before we did anything serious about it in this country. Maybe, I was letting my fears and prejudices get the better of me.

Explosive roars of the tiger

Then from just after 9:00 PM, there were a series of bangs, and this continued until well after midnight and for a while I could not determine why and I did not venture out to find out. Then I am just half a kilometre away from Manchester’s Chinatown and amongst the many things they are good at fireworks can be a beauty to watch as I was able to from my neighbour’s apartment in Amsterdam at the typical new year.

Gong hay fat choy is the Cantonese greeting I have decided to share today, translating to Happiness and Prosperity for the year of the tiger. I find it strange that this is the first time in my 8 lunar new years in Manchester that my slumber was partly distressed by the cacophony of celebratory fireworks. Then, this also heralds some sort of normalcy, not that the pandemic is over, but we are coping better with it.

Happy Chinese & Lunar New Year!