Sailing 101 - Prepare to get wet

Getting in

I attend C3 Amsterdam, a well-attended international and multicultural church that places quite a lot of emphasis on interaction, engagement, relationships and leadership development.

Whilst, I was one of the earlier attendees when it is a much smaller congregation, I seemed to be quite involved in a lot of activities but over time, I have withdrawn, disengaged and become more of an attendee rather than a member.

Lately, I have endeavoured to relate more and find some purpose within that community with great difficulty much of which somewhat derives from a sometimes reserved and aloof Englishness that I cannot say serves me well at all.

Perceptions of a different reality

A few weeks ago, an announcement was made inviting the men for a sailing day out, to which after much hesitation I decided to attend with somewhat interesting impressions of what to expect which was far from reality.

Now, having watched the MainSail programme on CNN, I had a good few ideas, a large boat with many sails unfurled to take about 30 men out, maybe a catamaran – in fact, what I was thinking of was probably a motored yacht with everyone having a time of fun, conversation and letting our hair down.

This outing was planned for Saturday, the 23^rd of July and on Friday we were intimated of the possibility that the event might be cancelled if the weather forecast was bad, I had been thinking of pulling out too but felt I had to see it through and it offered me the opportunity to suggest to our pastor that he might have to calm the stormy waters like Jesus did if the weather did take a turn for the worse.

Arrangements dawning on us

We had a rendezvous where the planner checked off the names and all the other essentials before drove in a convoy to Loosdrecht. Now, Loosdrecht Lakes or Loosedrechtse Plassen in the vernacular used to be a peat bog centuries ago, it was mined for peat and then dredged; the sand used for construction and in the process with Dutch ingenuity of land and water management, we have a number of large lakes which are mainly used for water sports much as it is a nature reserve too.

We were to be prepared for the weather, that was cold and rain alike, but it suddenly dawned on many of us that preparing to sail was a bit less leisurely than we had imagined.

Amongst us were sailors who were to skipper boats of 6 crew, we were out sailing alright but crewing our boats, the boats were just about 4 metres long and just about 2 metres at the widest point with a mainsail and a headsail/foresail called a jib. The type of boat we were in will be called a sloop which has its etymology from Dutch sloep and by extension the French chaloupe.

The organisation is quite impressive, snacks and drinks provided beyond the lunch packs we are asked to bring along and we were all provided with life-jackets which eventually helped in keeping us quite warm.

Wet, Wet, Wet

We boarded our boats and motored out of the harbour then hoisted up our sails, our skipper quite confident and able simply instructed us on what to do and then we began to realise that the ropes meant a lot in terms of the sails, where we going and there was much to the steer of the rudder and how we catch the wind.

We were told we should expect to get wet did become especially for those who sat in the front. We had a good few precarious tilts off the wind but we are assured we will not be dumped in the water and it was comforting to know that the water was barely 2 metres deep and in the event of being caught up a creek without a paddle, besides the outboard motor there was a pole to use for punting.

The ropes controlling the jib are called sheets and the sheets can be pulled right or left of the mast of the main sail aiding steer but it was the rudder that seemed to have the greatest effect on how the boat took the water and the white-knuckle ride kind of experiences we had.

In the end, it was great fun, we all had a go at the rudder as each of us successively got more water spray and splashes on ourselves and the boat sometimes filled with water that we were soiled worse than having been bed-wetters.

Thanks for the day

We had a couple of meeting points even some got in the water for a swim and along the way we encountered strong winds, stillness that the ducks seemed to be on turbo-jets, rain and bluster but the whole setting did make for a sense of male bonding which was fun.

I might consider going out sailing again and this time for all the lessons I have learnt including one that appreciated the wonders of being of on terra-firma, rain gear for sailing is a whole lot different from regular rain gear, ropes would probably be best handled with gloves on, taking sailing lessons can be useful, even crocs for all their ugliness might well be recommended footwear but I’ll try anything but those things.

It was great fun and thanks to Timon the skipper and my crewmates, Buddy, Chris, Raymond and Levy, for all that experience, there are still some things best watched on National Geographic though I have been once tempted out of the cosy setting of my armchair, furry slippers, cup of cocoa and remote controller.

Boycott British Airways

Oh! Golly Gosh!

The British Airways (BA) have not only gotten their knickers in a twist, the buffoons have had their shoe laces tied together at the start of every race they have entered that they fall splat when the starting orders are given.

Being British, I think I have flown that airline only once and never returned, the service between the UK and West Africa is quite lucrative for BA because the choices leave people paying well over the odds for outrageous service and maximum discomfort from the most uncouth that can be found of the most dreadful crew in that organisation.

The story I read through blogs posted by Funmi Iyanda and Chxta which is spreading disgust but not fast enough to get BA to come to its senses leaves me incandescent with rage.

Disrespect of customers

The Mirror newspaper carried the news and I could very well see myself in the shoes and place of the person that has suffered the most from the incident.

The first issue is the utter disrespect that a commercial airline has for its paying customers that they would allow possibly unstable and seriously distressed customers on the plane where security and restraint can in some ways be used in excess.

A deportee was brought on the flight and under the “gentle” handling of law enforcement that the man was screaming words to the effect that he was going to die.

Wherever, I might have been on that plane after a while of hearing that, I would have gotten out of my seat to find out what was going on, that is what Ayodeji Omotade did – someone who in my view had not allowed the overwhelming indifference of society to inure him to the suffering of others. (His ordeal in his own words appears here.)

Deportees and sadder memories

Many Nigerians would be aware of a case last year where another distressed deportee (Osamuyia Aikpitanhi) had a bag put over his head that he died in Spain – it would have been a basic reflexive thing to have said, “Please, don’t kill him”, just as he could have said, “Please, be careful”, which would have meant the same thing but implying the first statement.

The ever so “friendly” crew buffeted him saying the police were doing what was their job where they should have been working hard to stop other passengers from getting just as distressed as the non-paying deportee.

Maybe transporting deportees is a more lucrative business for BA; I sure do not want to share a plane with someone who has been put on the plane under duress.

In fact, if there are so many deportees to be returned to a country, why do the immigration authorities not arrange a “Gitmo” style plane to take them back to their countries? Though, I think that would garner the worst kind publicity for them – but if they cannot find ways to handle deportees more humanely, they would just have to remain where they are.

Distress and injustice

The deportee was taken off the flight, and then they came for Ayodeji Omotade who they thought was a disrupting influence and the police gave him hell, it is completely unacceptable – he should be talking to his Member of Parliament (Jonathan Shaw) forthwith – that would go to the heart of the matter quickly.

The pilot seeing that there would be an insurrection for this victimisation of the innocent, something they have gotten away with for ages but not this time, then ordered all Nigerians off the plane – 136 of them – that is his prerogative.

As usual, the “spineless” onlookers from other nations had now been terrorised enough not to get involved just in case they are slapped with some ridiculous charge – considering they might already have been psychologically damaged by what they had observed before – but BA does not care a jot about customers going to West Africa, no pleasantries just aggravation.

Blunders A-plenty

Then BA gets its quarry, the lucrative deportee back on the plane, with 136 empty seats it flies off to Nigeria with a statement that a large number of passengers became disruptive and that they take any threats against their crew or passengers very seriously and this kind of behaviour will not be tolerated.

If BA cannot realise that devaluing the quality of travel of their customers and creating distress by bringing on the flight a seriously distressed passenger would create that kind of situation, they are their own worst enemy.

British Airways has form in not knowing how to do good customer service or business that works; from their run in with Richard Branson in the dirty tricks saga where they thought Sir Richard was insignificant and he then took them to the cleaners.

Their ethnic tailfin designs got the greatest putdown from Baroness Thatcher when she put her handkerchief over the awful designs that replaced the British flag, they also got caught out in a fuel surcharge cartel Sir Richard shopping them to the authorities again and now Terminal 5 is taking BA to its terminal decline – this one with Nigerians should be the very last straw.

BA has nothing to make the British proud of and in all is an utter global disgrace, a change in management could not be called for too soon already, that organisation is an organic and malignant disaster.

Boycott BA

Ayodeji Omotade has now been banned from travelling by BA, this man is not Naomi Campbell by any stretch of the imagination – in my view, anyone who has any affiliation with Nigeria should boycott that organisation altogether – fly anything but BA.

I do not know if we have an Ambassador in the UK who speaks up for Nigerians, by Mr. Omotade is also British so his Member of Parliament would suffice in his case, but in the case of others somebody must be up for them.

There is a petition on this matter called Nigerians boycott British Airways for this outrageous treatment of Nigerians, please sign in and voice your protest. Please register your protest with an identity and possibly a comment, anonymous protests do not carry that much weight.

Unfasten your seat belts

Arrived safely

An update to the events of yesterday, regarding my flight to Las Palmas de Gran Canaria.

The control tower did not suffer complete radio silence; we arrived at our destination just about 4 hours 10 minutes behind schedule.

When I wrote the piece yesterday, my flight was delayed for a total of 2 hours 20 minutes, we finally boarded the alternate flight just after 3 hours of waiting and it was interesting to see one of those Dutch attitudes at play.

Seats for bags

I have written before that people have a tendency to occupy an extra seat for their bags on the bus, trams, trains and metro – well, since we had open seating on the plane, as I got on the plane, there were seats all up to halfway down the flight which were occupied by bags.

This is reminiscent of the generalised view that Germans pre-reserve beach seats and sun loungers with their towels in the witching hour (Someone burnt the towels) – my hotel has a big notice advising people to desist from that poor social attitude.

Indeed, there is some administrative encumbrance with pre-allocating seats but that means seating is efficient and people are forced to use the overhead bins or the space on the floor in front of them under then the seat.

Now, other advantages meant people could seat together with their large companies, it also meant, I was far from squealing children, especially, the ones that are completely implacable.

Safety instruction – unfasten seat beats

My fear however was about the flight being crewed by people unfamiliar with the layout of the plane considering I had recently watched the sinking of ship that lead to the major loss of life because the ship was crewed by people unfamiliar with the layout of the boat.

As we settled down, the captain welcomed us on board though without an apology from TUI, rather, he said they were stepping in for AkeFly, however, we had another 30 minutes to wait because the plane needed to be refuelled.

When the fuel truck arrived we were told more than twice to take off our seatbelts, I suppose that would be as a precaution if the highly volatile fuel were to spill, cause noxious fumes or catch fire.

In read now that in 2000 there was such an incident about fuel estimation/starvation and short landings - Hapag-Lloyd Flight 3378.

For the third possibility, I could not imagine how that tightly packed plane would have been evacuated – in fact, in the 80s there was a fire at the Johnson Wax aerosol factory in Lagos where my uncle worked and one of the things people said was people were getting seriously burnt but no one could see the flames – thankfully, my uncle was far away from the event though for a while there was someone else who shared his surname who had been caught in the inferno and eventually needed treatment in the States – we were beside ourselves for a while.

I cannot remember seeing the safety choreography and that is probably because the crew of HapagFly were German, but then English should have sufficed.

In fact, none of the safety instructions would have helped save passengers – seat belts, air masks, life jackets, brace position or getting to the emergency exits – we were put at very serious risk, though thankfully nothing untoward happened.

Better than ArkeFly

We took off and we were served hot meals, probably a stable for HapaqFly denied the Dutch on ArkeFly; same company but different services for different countries.

When flight TFL 119 which replaced OC 109 finally landed, there was sporadic applause for work well done and now an apology for the delay – my travel agent says I should still get a basic refund for not travelling Comfort Class, but I do not think charter flights are covered by the EU Passenger Rights charter that would have had some major compensation for delaying the flight for more than 2 hours.

Having learnt from the coach transfer experience that had us delivered last to our hotel, my taxi transfer was smooth and the only bit of detail not satisfied was I asked for a room as high as possible in a 7-floor hotel and ended up on the 3^rd floor.

Today, I am not one shawl short of an Eskimo warding off the cold, but one g-string short of a beach bum – it is about to rain, but we have had temperatures in the 20s of Celsius already.

Rain tales of egrets

Talking of rain, when it did rain yesterday the sun was also shining – it reminded me of what we were told as kids – the rain and sun at the same time indicates a midwifery duty of nature as the lioness is having cubs. Ekùn ń bímo (Yoruba – The lion is having babies).

Another such tale was when we saw cattle egrets flying past we waved our back hands and sang out that believing we would get a white pigment stain on our finger nails (If only we knew that was a sign of some serious medical condition) – the egret in Yoruba legend is known for being white and clean no matter how dirty it gets. Lékeléke gbà mí léèke (Yoruba – Egrets please give me a mark).

Ah! The sun shines again – should I use factor-10 with UVA/UVB protection?