Saturday 24 February 2024

Thought Picnic: Seeing the more in the person

Just as it is

I recently had a series of exchanges that pertained to relationships concerning significant others. My inclination to err on the side of full disclosure has meant that in most cases the discovery of who I am does not come as a total surprise.

Being open about my sexuality since the early 1990s when it was not popular and sometimes frowned upon in the workplace was not to exhibit flamboyance but to address the scenarios where loose talk might cause unnecessary and avoidable offence.

I have been quite fortunate that I have encountered very little discrimination on the matter. If you ask a direct question, you will get the answer, when I was in a relationship, who I was in a relationship with and what we planned to do at the weekend. Relationships have always mattered to me because it meant I had someone with whom to share life experiences, unconventional as that situation might be.

Engagement with due consideration

In many cases, I have had colleagues ask questions, seeking information or enlightenment, sometimes about me, about themselves, or someone else. I would speak from my experience and understanding of issues, whether it be curiosity or having to deal with the situation of a friend abandoning a marriage for a new journey of self-discovery.

For me as a person, it matters and when others give due consideration to it, acknowledge it, respect it, and genuinely enquire about my well-being by embracing that context. It is why I felt quite enamoured when a prospective colleague deduced from my frequent travels and other information I divulged, that those journeys for whatever length of time they were for, were essentially family visits.

As we love to be loved

It is important and it is about my well-being and happiness rather than about anyone else, we choose our friends and much as we choose our partners, all familial and extended relations have the choice to embrace, reject, or be indifferent, but who an individual has as their significant other remains so regardless of opinion, for a different kind of intimacy exists between partners that is not present with any other.

There is something about being fulfilled and completed by certain associations, you may not understand it, but it exists, and it is what it is. For me, Brian represents that significant other and to be loved, cared for and supported like I am can only be what anyone else wishes for in whoever they have chosen to be their partner.

We should be careful not to be tempted to dismiss the importance and significance of the intimate relationships of others.

Related Blogs

Blog - This is my life, this is me (February 2019)

Blog - Doing what I do for love (September 2019)

Blog - Brian, My Funniest Valentine (February 2020)

Blog - Finding who all matters with (August 2020)

Blog - In my heart and in my mind (April 2021)

Blog - Thought Picnic: Understanding my greater good (May 2021)

Blog - This is deep stuff now (December 2021)

Blog - Make Someone Happy (April 2022)

Blog - Thought Picnic: Mostly, one is not alone (May 2023)

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