ASGA - Advanced Shaving Gel Acronyms

They sprouted late

I could write a long story about shaving though I never really saw the need to shave until I was well past 25; I almost thought I would never have the need to shave.

Then the wayward desert sprouts of hair began to multiply and before I knew it, a beard was forming whilst I could still sport a flat-top crew-cut with a slightly pointed head.

The regimes of shaving started with clippers and all sorts of shavers, each with improved technologies until Philips introduced a wet shaving machine that allowed you to introduce the shaving gel as you passed the shaver around your face.

On top, there was the advent of male-pattern baldness, I decided inspired by snake-oil remedies for preventing hair-loss to take it all off and so my shaving became the complete removal of facial and scalp hair.

Losing hair battles

After a while I got fed up of using electric and battery-powered shavers especially when I had to deal with in-growing hair causing bumps. I even tried using depilatories which had their side effects of discomfort and then memories of my father using Magic shaving powder had me shopping for those in African shops though I was never one for Old Spice.

One evening in a hotel in Germany I had a 3-blade Gillette shaving razor and did my scalp and head in one go, that began my use of the razors and my preference for shaving gel over shaving foam.

That was the Gillette Mach 3 Turbo that I used according to instructions on the packet, one the strip faded, I replaced the razor, but after a few years of using that brand, one evening whilst preparing for dinner on holiday I took a clean 2 square centimetres off my scalp – it hurt like I had never felt pain before – the search for a better razor commenced after that.

Better than a scimitar

Gillette Mach 3 Power was simply the same razor, at least from my layman’s perspective acting like a shaving vibrator; sure, I did scoff at the idea because they were expensive, trendy but honestly quite silly.

So, one day I walked into a drug store and saw the Gillette Fusion, a 5-blade razor, that seemed like the ultimate razor, in fact, any more blades would have made it a follicular combine harvester but you cannot put it past these people and for the humongous cost, I eventually realised the razors were good for probably a 100% more shaves than the usage indicators suggested.

Having sorted out the razors, there was also the story of shaving gels, I easily settle for the Gillette brand shaving gels but those had more varieties than colours of rainbow offering every sort of comfort for the skin and labelled for the razor in order to bump up the prize – we really have been had on these matters.

I usually favoured gels with Aloe Vera and Vitamin E, I noticed on my holidays to Gran Canaria that Aloe Vera was literally a weed, it grew everywhere like grass in the strangest places and for all its natural properties for the skin and as a drink the real thing has an almost sickening smell when cut and it is one smell that sticks to your olfactory receptors for hours just as onions leave a marker on your hands for hours after peeling and cutting them.

King of Shaves

But long before I became a razor fan with the need for shaving gels, I was told of products from the King of Shaves that could deal with bumps and other skin irritation as a result of shaving. I started with the After Shave and the Moisturiser but never the shaving gel. In fact, I did start using King of Shaves when I was still living in the UK and because the products were not available in the Netherlands, I had to find alternatives.

Sometime ago, on one of my London sojourns, I saw a variety of King of Shaves products, got the usual ones and thought I will try the shaving gel. I never really got to use it until a few days ago and really it was yesterday that I bothered to read all the stuff on the tube.

What got me were the acronyms as I peered through the running shower to read the spiel – SSE v5.0, ALS², mDDS, MME & PSP. I was ready to risk the unusual expletive because looking at the acronyms one would have thought I was talking of software, probably some scientific process and something so complex that it would require the mathematical genius of a savant to unravel.

Really, King of Shaves, Azor, Advanced Shaving Gel, does take it to another level of marketing that is almost crass. I a hardly impressed with marketing sophistry, in fact, if I had read this before purchase, I most likely would have put it down for it pretentiousness but for the fact that I like other King of Shaves products.

Here goes

The one I have does not seem to be in stock anymore, though it seems Remington has it, but it is necessary to see what all those acronyms refer to.

King of Shaves Azor® Advanced Shaving Gel utilises SSE,™ v5.0 of our unique Skin Surface Enhancing technology, to deliver our best shave ever with ALS² (Advanced Lubrication System) and mDDS™ (micro Dual Delivery System) that helps protect, moisturize and lubricate your skin throughout the shave giving superlative razor performance and glide. Your face will be left amazingly smooth, supple and moisturized.This unique black gel with MME (Micro-Magnetically Enhanced) particles help the gel ‘stick’ to the blade throughout the shave.For best results use as part of the King of Shaves PSP™ (Prime, Shave, Protect) regime. PRIME: Shave during / after warm bath or shower and wash your face with King of Shaves Face Wash or Scrub. SHAVE: Squeeze a generous amount of Azor Gel onto hand and massage into wet beard. Shave carefully in direction of hair growth taking special care around the sensitive neck area. Rinse the blade frequently. PROTECT: After shaving, thoroughly rinse off, pat dry and protect skin with King of Shaves Moisturizer or Balm.

After which, you can be sure that you have not only had a close shave but you’ve been truly shaved. Phew!

Rebranding Nigeria: Blox Populi

Written for NigeriansTalk.Org

Good Request, Great Tardiness

Imagine a situation where a strong global brand like Coca Cola has garnered an unfavourable situation where drinkers of the product have had serious stomach upsets, then in a public relations offensive the management decides to rebrand the product having not essentially dealt with the primary issues that have tarnished the brand in the first place.

On Friday, Olumide of Loomnie.com and the new NigeriansTalk.org site invited me to review the blog reactions to the new branding of Nigeria – I rarely, if ever, take commissions like this because easy and interesting as it sounds, it is harder than one first realises – there is quite a lot to read before creating a review – I am the wiser.

Good Intentions, Great Inactions

Recently, Professor Dora Akunyili, the Minister of Information, started a campaign to re-brand Nigeria, in fact, when I first heard of it a few months ago, I was not enamoured by the idea at all, Ken Wedding, like me, writing on Re-branding Nigeria states – “I would have missed this new public relations campaign if not for the discussions on a couple of blogs written by Nigerians”, I would suppose we mostly picked up the thread from there.

He goes on to quote the minister who says, the campaign was aimed at “re-orienting Nigerians, changing the negative attitudes of Nigerians, making Nigerians believe in themselves, inculcating optimal spirit of patriotism in Nigerians and at the same time, celebrating our best before the international community”.

Good Aspirations, Great Challenges

Quite laudable, because the purpose of a brand is to draw attention to a product or commodity and persuade people of its quality, usefulness and utility, in the case of a country, Uche Nworah, of the Long Harmattan Season who writes in treatise mode that I took a holiday after reading his piece quotes a presumed expert on nation branding, Simon Anholt who says, “the challenges the developing world is facing today beside poor governance and weak infrastructure is the issue of weak nation brands and identities”.

However, going back to the Minister’s aims, it would appear that good governance and strong infrastructure might well help in persuading Nigerians of a pride in nationhood and give them a stronger national identity that could bolster celebrating our best to the world.

As he quotes another proponent of nation branding, “There is no arguing that the image we have of another country says a lot about how we view it as a tourist destination, a place to invest or a source of consumer goods”.

Bad Reports, Low Expectations

Let us hope the Minister has noted that the biggest challenge she then faces is in changing what the CIA FactBook says about Nigeria, one would concur with Uche Nworah here on Why we must rebrand Nigeria.

The truth as I found on LinkedIn the professional networking site was when Aisha Lami Adeyemo who appears to have a Nigerian name asked, “Rebranding Nigeria- I was wondering what impact do you think this reform will have on Nigeria as an Emerging Market?” and the three answers she got were very negative.

Mikhail Tretyak suggested international air crew are ferried out of the country so as not to spend their layover there and then asks, “How much cash does a typical businessman need to pay the bribes in order to get from the airport to his hotel?” and damns the whole exercise with “Rebranding won't work until the fundamentals change.”

Good Ideas, Great Fantasies

Reorienting Nigerians does smack of a sense of hubris, Nigerians have been reoriented from the beginning of time as their leaders have use cliques to deconstruct the sense of nationhood for tribal, familial, religious, regional or personal benefit – too many people are sceptical of this drive.

However, Mohammed Haruna whose write-up appears on Elendu Reports under the byline Akunyili and the "re-branding" of Nigeria: The limits of propaganda, first lauds her achievements as the head of NAFDAC, then wonders if the supposed successes of NAFDAC can really be translated to the rebranding Nigeria effort.

In fact, he contends that though there is a greater awareness of the work of NAFDAC, “the fact is that contrary to the image that NAFDAC under Akunyili has virtually eliminated the phenomena of fake drugs and drug abuse both have hardly experienced any significant decline. In spite of all her efforts, the open and illegal drug markets in the country including the three most notorious ones at Onitsha, Kano and Aba, have never really gone out of business. So also have those who openly hawk prescription drugs on our streets”.

Good Bloggers, Great Commentary

That does not bode well at all, however, Nigerians still maintain a sense of optimism as Oz of Mootbox says in announcing Good People...Great Nation, he concurs with the professor when she said, “This journey will be slow and painful…but we will be a better nation tomorrow”. He worried about the fact that so much had been spent “on this effort for us to tear it down on launch day” and he was “tired of the foreign media making fun of all our efforts”.

Tosin Obubela leaves a comment on that blog which is somewhere between gratuitous ululation and downright sarcasm – “Congratulations, you have a new name now. I know you have been through so much but never mind, a name can change a lot”.

SolomonSydelle of Nigerian Curiosity, notes that the foreign media mocked the initiative and even states that Nigerians at home and abroad were invited to design a logo and slogan for the venture, when I found the campaign notice, I was utterly crest-fallen, the setup was shoddy, sloppy and sedentary – which is why many of us might not have seen it.

Bad Preparation, Low Responses

The campaign for entries was launched on the 5^th of February with a deadline of the 23^rd and some panel selected the slogan and logo for the launch that happened just over 2 weeks later. So, it is no wonder that Oz opined in a comment left for this blog, “Me thinks they were not ready and it was a rush job.”

Ouch! As SolomonSydelle admonishes the proponents with the concept that more Nigerians should have been involved in this exercise and Oz considers 5 things I would do differently, if he were running this campaign.

Good Branding, Great Debacle

However, all this rebranding talk exposes other issues, people who believe it would be another opportunity for patronage and graft, as Nwachukwu Egbunike on Feather’s Project opined, in his piece called The Rebranding Rumble – “neither the country nor her citizens being any better for it, except the PR consultants and their cohorts who had their pockets lined.”

He goes on to say, “The government should stop paying lip service to corruption. It is obvious that 90% of our image crisis arises from this monster, wash out corruption and you’ll have rebranded Nigeria, period! Nigerians are no fools; it takes a radical commitment to effect such a revolutionary change.”

Therein is the analogy I made at the beginning of this review and it has Grandiose Parlour saying the concerns of the people in the main are about survival, with his byline - Re-branding Nigeria? Yes, but not on empty stomach!

Suffice it to say that this campaign which does not seem to have a web presence, is not linked to any particular achievable goals for the economy, infrastructure or tourism and is yet to convince people of its worthwhile aims has been trumped by a more pressing slogan “If you can survive Nigeria, you can survive anywhere”

Good Nigeria, Great Nigeria

I leave the last words to another treatise Uche Nworah wrote 3 years ago, about the now extinct rebranding campaign which had Nigeria: The Heart of Africa as its slogan with the title Rebranding Nigeria’s Cities, and he quoting Tom Traynor & Ro Breehl – “every place does have some distinction, some reason to live there, work there, vacation there, rather than some other place”. They also argue that finding that ‘true compelling claim of distinction’ can be hard work which lots of tourism boards, city councils, business improvement districts aren’t prepared for, ‘preferring instead to move directly to (inevitably drab) advertising execution’.

This line of least resistance appears to be the one towed by Nigeria’s state and local government officials.

In other words, Good People, Great Nation, but no lessons learnt; for the optimists, we wish the campaign success; for the pragmatists, keep pushing the agenda for better correlation of ideas; for the pessimists, hold your peace and the indifferent – what difference does it make, Nigeria is still a country of good people and a great nation, it may not be a reality today, but having it as a dream and aspiration is a good start.

Nigeria: What Africans for Obama exposes about judgement

Leaders who cannot be wrong

I do not know what it is with leaders and people who are supposed to be in reputable positions who cannot admit that they might have been wrong, economical with the actualité or had a lapse in judgement.

Where they seem to have been caught out in public, instead of admission you get denial and instead of humility you get hubris.

Their utterances in those times of personal tribulation suddenly begins to show the type of person they are, they probably cannot be gracious in defeat, they are probably driven with cold ambition that the end always justifies the means and they are probably are too far away from good counsel to realise the error of their ways.

Leaders with virtue

What these people reveal about humanity is that it probably takes one set of virtues to rise to the top and we cannot begrudge them their success, but it takes another set of virtues to earn respect by reason of the person you are regardless of what you have been able to achieve.

Dare I say that people seem to confuse both sets of virtues and think they can interchange them to buttress both their achievements and character; we can easily get blindsided by these manipulations which would prevent us from getting to the truth about matters concerning these leaders.

Fulminating silliness

Our dear Professor Ndi (Ndidi) Onyiuke-Okereke, the highly successful and high achieving Director-General of the Nigerian Stock Exchange seems to have been caught in that confusion and the more she fulminates the less one is able to admire her for her smartness and sense of judgement.

I am still living down the silliness of the outburst that she is a very intelligent person who has a PhD she did not buy, as if anyone cares if she got it from a burger-flipping university though she might be referring to others amongst her detractors who might have acquired theirs at a buy-one-get-four-free shop.

However, what her outburst does tell us is that Nigerians generally might not see the difference between great achievement and good judgement, something she has decided to exploit without necessarily realising that she has exposed herself to greater ridicule.

The detail of her folly

The issue at hand is that she fronted the Africans for Obama organisation and being such a high-profile figure in Nigeria and probably internationally, she organised a fund-raising activity without properly stating her intention to the Obama campaign organisation in America.

It would appear the first the Obama campaign organisation heard of her fundraising event was when an advertisement was placed in the PunchOnline newspaper with the picture of Barack Obama and the Yes we can! slogan of the campaign without any clear disclaimers that the Africans for Obama organisation was not in any way affiliated or associated with the core Obama organisation in America.

Chronology of events

Three days before the event, to forestall any attacks in America about foreign backers raising funds for his presidential campaign a counsel from Obama for America, Inc. wrote to the editor of PunchOnline advising the editor there was no affiliation and no funds raised by Africans for Obama would be accepted, the detail of which I covered in an earlier blog [1].

Now, the letter might have arrived at PunchOnline after the event, but one should clearly note that the Obama organisation had already disavowed this charade before the spectacle of people displaying more money than brains took place.

Trying to impress

Indeed, there is probably some good intention in trying to “sensitise” American-Nigerians to the need to vote for Senator Barack Obama as president, but they are the ones living in America and they might well be persuaded of other aspirants that some busybody organisation from Nigeria might just convince them of their persuasion.

Perhaps Professor Okereke-Onyiuke who was an adjunct rather than a substantive professor [2] at the New York City University was going to impress them with her college degree and hence bring her views to bear on supposedly hapless and less intelligent American-Nigerians.

Where she lacked judgement

This is where the lady was lacking in judgement

Being such a high-profile Nigerian she could have supported such an Obama organisation in Nigeria without fronting it like she did.

Once she had decided to organise a dinner/concert with all the fanfare and publicity; she should have sounded out somebody in the Obama organisation in America for advice on how to channel her activities properly.

Having not done that, the advertisement placed by Africans for Obama should have stated clearly that they are in no way affiliated to the Obama organisation in America.

Once she had learnt of the dissociation by the Obama organisation she could have acquiesced and offered that she had done what she had done in good faith and would learn the lessons from this poor situation.

If the words of her vociferous defence had been spoken by someone else of a similar stature, a peer, in Nigeria or internationally, there might have been more to it, but from her, it smacks of self-conceited megalomania typical of garrulous and uncouth Nigerians.

This whole thing about people being jealous of her success is sick-making enough, who cares how successful she has become? I don’t. We just care that Nigerians in leadership stop making a laughingstock of Nigeria at home and abroad, and then compound the whole thing with braggadocio.

So, on the BBCNews site [3] she delivers the coup de grace, “I am a woman of the highest integrity.” To which I say with all the disgust and disdain I can muster – BULLSHIT!!!

Sources

[1] Nigeria: I am a very intelligent person (Africans for Obama) 

[2] The Vanguard: The fall and fall of Prof Ndi Okereke-Onyiuke

[3] BBC NEWS | Africa | Row in Nigeria over Obama money

Apes Obey! Lack of apprehension

If she could have visualised the future

One can almost begin to sympathise or even attempt to empathise with Professor Ndi (Ndidi) Okereke-Onyiuke, the Director-General of the Nigerian Stock Exchange as her bluster creates more tribulation on the verge of ruining her otherwise well-earned reputation.

Even I could not have anticipated a situation where I would be writing an Apes Obey! Series [1] with her as the principal frame of reference.

What this simply signifies is the sad but succinct analysis of character that Lord Lugard documented of Nigerians 86 years ago which permeates all strata of society from the lowly proletariat to the aristocrats of business and politics.

Ruing the race about race

Professor Okereke-Onyiuke must be ruing the day she allowed her quite sharp and incising thinking along with her great intelligence, her academic PhD and stature of being a woman of the highest integrity [2] to play second fiddle to the notion and politics of race affiliation.

Supporting Senator Barack Obama for his policies, rhetoric, thinking, ideas, vision and message of hope alone should have made this matter a cause for the meeting of minds and buttressed the points about her intelligence but she made it a meeting of the colours of the skin.

Basically, she was pandering to race and emotively trying to persuade people of African descent who happen to be Americans to view Senator Barack Obama from that perspective rather than one of a person who has brought a message of change that is in season to change a nation and eventually the world at large.

The other matters about her judgement and her outburst are already covered in blogs [3] I have written and many others in the Nigerian blogging community.

The problems

The aftermath of the advertisement, the dinner/concert, the moneys raised and the robust defences are the subject of this blog.

Having raised about N100 million ($834,000), with the Africans for Obama dinner/concert, regardless of the chronology of events, the Obama organisation put out a letter of disavowal and dissociation to the Editor of PunchOnline that published the advertisement for the party. [3]

Since the fundraising concert did not clearly state its intentions regarding the raising of funds even though the professor contends that it was to sensitise American-Nigerians to vote for Senator Obama as opposed to going out to vote as a civic duty regardless of who they decide to vote for the whole event was on the verge of looking fraudulent and deceitful by obtaining funds under false or dubious pretences.

Interest of the agencies

Just after the event, the Security and Exchange Commission in Nigeria queried [4] the Director-General to clarify her position on this Africans for Obama organisation and the publicity accompanying her fundraising event in the light of her prominent position in the economic profile of Nigeria.

As she protested the transparency of the Africans for Obama organisation and acclaimed her high integrity; the whole exercise was fast becoming a farce of idle busybodies but she felt she could bulldoze and bluster her way through the criticisms of her actions.

In fact, two anti-graft organisations by reason of her office could have had some interest in this developing farce, the Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Commission (ICPC) where Sections 13, 18 & 19 [5] without much legal argument would cast the Director-General as a public office holder and without much extrapolation would have made an offence in Nigeria to sensitive through fund-raising Nigerians to vote for a particular candidate and hence an offence to attempt to do such in the United States.

The indignity of it all – meeting the EFCC

However, the higher profile Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) [6] has taken an interest in the case and Professor Okereke-Onyiuke has suffered the multiple indignities of

Being invited for an interview with the EFCC

Being detained [7] overnight in their facilities then released [8]

Having her passport seized [9] then returned with the advice that the commission be informed of her intentions to travel

Being told to return all moneys [10] to the last kobo to all donors and participants possibly with her bearing the full cost of the dinner/concert she organised and not being able to defray costs

And they are conducting an independent investigation of the banks [11] holding finances of the Africans for Obama organisation with the unfortunate impression that they have not taken her for her word.

A lack of apprehension

That there is a whiff of a financial crime involving the Director-General of the Nigerian Stock Exchange due to an unfortunate lapse in judgement that could have been minimised with a humble and contrite admission is as bad a hit to the reputation of a highly placed person as one can get.

But this is a trait to be expected of Nigerians according to Lord Lugard when he talked of what has impressed him “as those most characteristic of the African native are his lack of apprehension and his lack of ability to visualize the future.” [1]

In this case the professor threw caution to the wind by not being apprehensive about being misconstrued as having a conflict of interest or the use of her exalted office to promote issues where such high profile people should be very discreet.

The law of consequence

Her inability to visualise the future also indicates how she could never have expected her well intentioned activities to lead to these rather embarrassing developments even though there were enough warning signs and detractors to make her think again about her activities.

This same lack of apprehension allows us to muddle through issues rather than thinking through and following through to a conclusion, it allows for the subjective of the present to overrule the concept of anticipation, preparation, thoroughness and objective thinking.

We leave everything to divine providence without making the necessary plans to accept the providence such that if one encounters misfortune, it is not blamed on the lack of planning or preparation but externalised to vague enemies and detractors.

The law of consequence is being able to visualise what our decisions now would create for the future – short term or long term – we have very little regard for the possible consequences of our actions or inaction.

What we do to ourselves alone

It can be outrageous to suggest that most misfortune is brought on more by self-fulfilling prophecies or self-inflicted action because one does not apply ones abilities, talent and intellect to the fullest rather attribute issues to the active malevolence of some vague enemy, else that enemy would be identified, confronted and defeated.

The inability to visualise the future permeates all strata of society from the feeling of morbidity of writing wills and testaments to pension planning to times of retirement, but it also includes family planning where people who have insufficient means do not discipline themselves enough to prevent bringing into the world children they cannot properly care for.

The list is long, the analysis too harrowing and the analogies ever present, just as palpable as ones hand touches ones face for feeling and comfort, we all have a lot to learn from both Professor Okereke-Onyiuke and Lord Lugard, it is both a shame and instructive that this seemingly benign Africans for Obama event exposes more about what people have observed of us Africans in a negative and pejorative sense.

Sources

[1] Introducing the Apes Obey! Series [akinblog.nl]

[2] Nigeria: What Africans for Obama exposes about judgement [akinblog.nl]

[3] Nigeria: I am a very intelligent person (Africans for Obama) [akin.blog-city.com]

[4] Daily Trust - the online edition - Obama: SEC queries Okereke-Onyiuke

[5] Corrupt Practices and other Related Offences Act 2000

[6] Economic and Financial Crimes Commission - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[7] THISDAY ONLINE / Nigeria news / Obama: EFCC Detains Okereke-Onyiuke

[8] allAfrica.com: Nigeria: EFCC Releases Okereke-Onyiuke

[9] The Punch: Okereke-Onyiuke’s passport seized

[10] NIGERIAN TRIBUNE - News: Okereke-Onyiuke must return N100m donation - EFCC - Passport seized, returned

[11] The Punch: Obama fundraiser: EFCC storms banks

Nigeria: I am a very intelligent person (Africans for Obama)

The default is Obama

I go into recluse and somehow a wind blows that shivers my timbers. It has taken time for me to warm up to the idea that Senator Barack Obama might well become the President of the United States.

That notion comes from the compelling evidence that the man has formed a movement that sits on the tide of time that calls for change and understandably, there was nothing the Clinton machine could do if she was campaigning against a movement whose time had come.

Between John McCain and Barrack Obama, despite my deepest premonitions about what the latter, he appears to represent in what he has been able to do, the world’s fate and future; the world is probably better secured in the hands of Barack Obama for the fulfilment of whatever the purposes of destiny are.

Blackening animal sameness

I have not been given to the idea that Senator Obama being darker hue of pale and sporting a similar tan to mine creates a kinship of minds, ideas, visions and ideals.

I am saddened the objectivity of many has been beclouded such that where they should find kinship through the audacity of hope and purpose, they have plumbed the depths of similarity, they have found the basest level of kinship as birds of a feather that flock together.

As elevated as the human species is, we sometimes find mutual purpose in the animal instinct of the fellowship of race and colour, just as the canine family finds kinship in the olfactory inhalation of faecal orifices – there is probably a place for all this and one is not against how people decide to express their kinship.

African busybodies for Obama

One Professor Ndi Okereke-Onyiuke, who apparently is the Director-General of the Nigeria Stock Exchange, has landed herself in a quagmire of ignominy that she for her girth might find difficult to wiggle out of.

She inaugurated the Africans for Obama Presidency in July where she opined that, “The policies of Obama will have effect for Africa, not only the world, because he believes in Africa”. [1]

She then organised an "Africans for Obama" Dinner/Concert with a poster advert of Barack Obama and his campaign slogan, Yes, we can! [2].

The naturally obsequious Nigerians seeking validation threw money into the busker's hat as she played the music praising our black brother Obama for the emancipation of the world – however, the Obama for America campaign has completely disowned the professor’s clique and her antics. [3]

We all know that it is illegal for US Presidential campaigns to receive funds from abroad, I would suppose that means from non-Americans; but the matter here is whilst the professor holds a green card and has lived in the United States for 16 years, her organisation had published an advertisement on the PunchOnline website that gave the impression that Africans for Obama was raising funds for Obama for America.

Therefore, Ms. Kendall C. Burman, a Staff Counsel with the Obama for America organisation was compelled to state [4] that Africans for Obama is no way affiliated and is in no way associated with either Obama for America, Inc. or the Democratic National Committee.

Conveying dubious intent

The paragraph of interest reads – I have stressed in bold the particular area of concern in the paragraph.

“We wanted to make clear that the event and this organization are in no way associated with Obama for America or the Democratic National Committee should this organization seek to place additional advertisements in your paper”.[4]

I think it goes without saying that whatever advertisements were placed before this letter was received by the editor of Punch Online must have conveyed even in the slightest sense that Africans for Obama was associated and affiliated to the core Obama organisation in America and the subtle hint to PunchOnline in Ms. Burman’s letter was to add a disclaimer to subsequent placements of that advertisement.

Don’t buy this sob story

Dr. Ndi Okereke-Onyiuke who is now receiving flak from all corners has come out protesting that never was her dinner/concert fundraiser aimed at raising funds for the Obama campaign but to sensitise (Nigerian English) Africans in America about the need to come out and vote for the big bird of the same feather.

With the wall-to-wall coverage of the Presidential campaign in the United States, I am quite amused that Nigerians based in Nigeria can add to the publicity rather than embarrass the man in their quest for validation.

This is the same woman who spearheaded the Corporate Nigeria campaign organisation that sought to extend Olusegun Obasanjo’s term in contravention of our constitution and fledgling democracy.

A very intelligent person

To crown it all, she protests, “I am a very intelligent person; I have a PhD that I did not buy. We were careful with our advertisements and we were transparent in all we did. I don‘t understand why Nigerians like to be negative. People have been mobilising support for Obama all over the world and they are not being castigated. I want to make it clear that I am a Nigerian and I have the right to do anything I want with my time and my money.”

Calm down! Madam, you are getting a bit melodramatic there; I agree wholeheartedly with most of what you have said, I am dubious about that clause on transparency and I am sorry I do not agree at all with the first clause – A PhD does not automatically confer intelligence on the holder, no matter what else you have achieved. This time the lady is trying to be too smart.

If you for once think who can hit me on the head with your title, qualifications and office whilst trying to obfuscate your skulduggery, well, I am not intimidated, not one bit.

Democracy for the moneyed

Suffice it to say that the busker’s hat collected N100 million ($833,540) and our Madam threw N10 million on her own crap table in what is the typical hedonistic show of money that has become the hallmark of uncultured, uncouth, degenerate and reprobate Nigerians.

A country where they conducted elections that were a complete sham now offers democratic inspiration to one that has had it running for over 2 centuries and has learnt from at least 4 years ago that ever vote counts and at least most votes in America do get counted and tallied to reflect the will of the electorate.

That is done.

Taking the Punch

Oh! Before I forget, just before PunchOnline runs off smugly with their headline “Obama disowns Okereke-Onyiuke, others”. Looking at the letter that came from the Obama organisation and for the purposes of reference, I have made a copy of the picture of that letter acknowledging that it belongs to PunchOnline and should remain available for public viewing to maintain balance in this discourse.

The advertisement placed by Africans for Obama must have been before the 8^th of August 2008 when the Obama organisation wrote to PunchOnline. The event took place on the 11^th of August 2008 and PunchOnline releases information about the disavowal on the 19^th of August 2008 – long after they have laughed their way to the bank.

Surely, PunchOnline could have for all good ethical business practice released a very prominent disclaimer to correct the impression given by the adverts placed before the 8^th of August 2008, somewhere between the 8^th of August and the 11^th of August 2008, maybe later.

There might well be the case that this could not have been done over the weekend or that the post ran late such that it was received after the event.

Not in good faith at all

PunchOnline could still have stated the advertisements were placed in good faith and on learning of the concerns raised by the Obama organisation, it was incumbent on them to avoid a situation where the public might appear to be misled.

One asks, when should we begin to expect integrity in business?

Obviously, this would have made a good few stupid moneybags stay away from the love-in as well as have generated unwanted bad publicity for a prime event.

That would have embarrassed Professor Ndi Okereke-Onyiuke, the powerful and influential Director-General of the Nigeria Stock Exchange, now, it would be disingenuous to suggest they were told to cool to story till well after the event, but the chronology of events leaves one quite suspicious.

The Ndi Rap

In the end, neither the reputation of PunchOnline nor the professor is enhanced by this farce and it would not be over till the fat lady sings, once again.

I am a very intelligent person,
I have a PhD that I did not buy,
with money, with money, with money.

I am a Nigerian, a real Nigerian person,
I have the right to do anything, everything, something,
I want with my time, my time, my time.

I am a very intelligent person,
I have the right to do anything, everything, something,
I want with my money, my money, my money

Chorus

My money, my time, my PhD
I am a very intelligent person

Hit it, Ndi!

I think it all needs improving on, answers on a postcard.

Sources

[1] Guardian Newspapers: Obama's victory can leapfrog African economies, says Okereke-Onyiuke

[2] Ben Smith's Blog: Africans for Obama - Politico.com

[3] The Punch: Obama disowns Okereke-Onyiuke, others

[4] Letter from the Obama organisation as a JPEG file published with the Punch article