Tuesday 28 April 2009

Using the law for silent sex

Regulating behaviour

In another case of unintended consequences this news story makes really interesting reading.

Since 1998, the Great Britain which consists of England, Scotland and Wales has instituted the Anti-Social Behaviour Order [1], otherwise known as ASBO to deal with people shown to have engaged in anti-social behaviour.

For basic instruction, the United Kingdom is Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

These orders came about to deal with the nuisance and problems with noisy neighbours, abandoned cars, vandalism, intimidating groups and goes on to include dog fouling, litter, graffiti and night-time noise.

Basically, the ambit of the ASBO is almost untrammelled if a community can show just cause for engaging the authorities to investigate, determine and consequently sanction infringements.

She is just having fun

However, nothing could have prepared this latest recipient of an ASBO [2] for her ordeal; apparently, a 48-year old lady had in the act of supposed copulation in the early hours of the morning been making “atrociously loud” noises.

Shouting and groaning with the bed banging against the wall at her home, she must have forgotten she was in Britain, as in the comedic send-up play imitating real life called – No sex please, we’re British [3]. Though could be further from the truth else we would not have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe.

However, the bed banging sounds very much like a number of scenes in the film My Super Ex-Girlfriend [4] (2006) that starred Uma Thurman.

Sour neighbour, dour neighbour

Anyway, the neighbours probably do have a serious grievance and hence need a sympathetic ear that might be deafened with decibels of groans of libidinous excess or are just frigid and prude that the thought of a seemingly middle-aged lady enjoying the pleasures of coital excitation as if she were 30 years younger is literally abhorrent.

In some cases, it can be thought that she was growing up disgracefully.

Stop it or zip it

She received an ASBO banning her from making excessive noise anywhere in England – now, that is an ambit that is scary – so, she could have gone to Scotland or Wales with her beau and brought the house down.

However, having been served the ASBO, in the space of 10 days she had breached her ASBO thrice and is now remanded in custody for the simple pursuit of her happiness, albeit with the possibly irritating side of letting people know she is enjoying it without inviting them to share in the fun.

A commonsense jury

She would be tried by jury as she has elected to have that privilege and I am hopeful that she would find a more sympathetic ear to an amazing situation where married people appear to be having an vibrant sex life and where the shouting, the banging and the noise is not a domestic but a consummation of holy matrimony.

The man with whom she has been having this great fun is her husband and like every case of sexual sanction, the woman takes the punishment for what it took 2 to create, he could be an accessory, accomplice or criminal, but this case has reached too far into the bedroom.

Not what ASBOs were intended for

No greater sanction should be incurred than for a simple commonsense judgement, they should invest in a sturdier bed or if they have concrete floors, do it on the floor and basically, they should soundproof the room in which they meet.

Since taxpayers’ money is being unnecessarily used to pursue the damnably incomprehensible, maybe we should really be contributing to this venture, but the jail is definitely not the solution to this challenge, the use of ASBOs to resolve this matter is deplorable in the least and beneath contempt drawing derision rather than accolades.

In my mind, that is definitely not what ASBOs were intended for, but if you only have a hammer, every problem might well be a nail.


[1] Anti-Social Behaviour Order - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[2] BBC NEWS | UK | England | Wear | Woman held for noisy sex 'breach'

[3] No Sex Please, We're British - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[4] My Super Ex-Girlfriend - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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