Monday 5 March 2007

The challenge of friendship

Not on the plane?

Let us adopt a pseudonym for my friend and suggest the name Bacchus; the irony of this selection should not be lost on anyone.

It would appear that my saga is developing into one that presents additional dilemmas, if I thought my life was begin to look like a soap opera, it is beginning to look like this episode would not end till that fat lady sings - as to who the fat lady is, well, I might just have to sit tight till the end of the show.

Here I was thinking that Bacchus had caught the schedule flight back to his base in Africa yesterday afternoon and my seeming nightmare had come to an end as I was jolted awake with the realities I had to face.

Well, only a few hours ago, I got a call from his brother indicating Bacchus had not arrived - What do you mean, he had not arrived? - Well, he had not caught the flight back home.

Now, I am back in the thick of it because, it would now appear that I am the last person to the knowledge of his people to have seen Bacchus even though he had contacted another relation here that he was ensconced in some hotel and had probably rescheduled his flight.

My hope and out hopes are that he did indeed board a flight in the direction of his base today and should land sometime this evening with everyone sighing in great relief.

Not alone in this

Whilst chatting to Bacchus' brother, we compared and exchanged notes, this lead to a number of revelations chief of which is the fact that Bacchus has over the last 6 to 8 months been losing friends to this misdemeanour of alleged alcohol-induced house thrashing - this is both instructive and quite worrisome.

Worrisome in that there really is an alcohol related big issue here and instructive in that there might be something we can do about this.

We who have had long-standing friendships with Bacchus would recognise that this is not the Bacchus we once knew. Singularly, we have each been visited with a circumstance that is beyond the pale and individually we have struck Bacchus off the list of anyone who would deign to be our friend.

If we now all learn that we are not all alone in this disaster of friendship that has happened upon each of us, do we then all abandon this young man who is clearly in need of help or do we try to find out who we are and band together to help this man out of what is clearly a desperate situation?

If Bacchus is busy wasting away the friends he should be able to call on in times of trouble or when in need of succour or support; would our inaction lead us to point where destruction and grief would leave us culpable as we selfishly remonstrated about the loss of trust when probably should selflessly band together, willing and encouraging Bacchus back to the life that made us very good friends, once upon a time?

Meanwhile, this was again too upsetting to continue at work today and this is the new dilemma.

In a nutshell

Now that I know I am not the only one to have suffered a house-thrashing from my friend in the last 6 months, do I selfishly bemoan my fate or band together with others who suffered to save our friend from a worse fate?

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