Wednesday, 4 February 2015

Essential Snobbery 101: Look back in anger

All the loo roles
I know I like to play with alliterations and a visit to a place downstairs just had me wondering how beneath the veneer of faux-respectability of people milling around as co-workers are habits that leave much to be desired.
The loo, lavatory, latrine, ladies, toilet, gents, bog, urinal, cottage, water closet (WC) or convenience is a somewhat private place for movements and activity nature intended.
That we have found systems to manage and handle the different deposits is credit to creativity and ingenuity of man to bring elements of sophisticated, yet understated finesse to the handling of foul substances.
Noticing notices of note
Once upon a time, to evacuate really did mean to let things go from the bowels, but now, it is mostly used to mean getting people out of a building, especially out of dangerous buildings or vehicles.
There are things that are expected in these places that people do not feel disposed to do that you end up reading notices like, “Please leave this place as you will like to find it” or “Please wash your hands”.
I will like to see in the men’s urinals notices that say, “Please do not spit your chewing gum into the urinal, ureic acid does not dissolve chewing gum and furthermore, chewing gum is not biodegradable.” Men reading this will fully understand what I mean. I don’t chew gum.
Just clean up after you
Now, I cannot say why toilet bowls are white in most cases, but white is an implicit revelation of otherness when some things are not done. Especially when there is the option to flush the toilet and a toilet brush to help, “Please leave this place as you will like to find it” – I guess this notice implicitly suggests anyone visiting a toilet expects to find it clean, no matter how many other visitors have been before, if they all clean up after use.
I swore under my breath when the revelation on white was so unmissable, the earlier user can only have been so uncultured to have taken his anti-social skills back to the day of the Palaeolithic man. Whilst, someone is paid to clean up after our mess, I do not think this was the kind of mess they were engaged to clean up.
That I can promptly lose respect for those who cannot look back in anger and ensure the next person looks in with a smile is my way of putting a four-letter word into a blog.
Please, always look back in anger when you have done your thing and “Please leave this place as you will like to find it. Thank you.

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