Friday, 17 August 2007

Silly Dingo hooked by Nubian money boobs

A tale so funny

This must be the subtext for a saga – Gullible from Oz – as we read earlier this week of an Internet bride scam.

A sheep farmer, Des Gregor, 56 from Australia had been involved in some Internet dating that blossomed into a virtual love affair with Natacha (picture downloaded from the millions on the Internet) – a twenty-something Liberian refugee who was in Mali. They somehow came to an arrangement where he was to visit Mali to get married to her, pocket a dowry of $86,000 and take her home.

Now this is as incredible as it gets as the press makes issue of the Internet fraud element of the story which lead to him being kidnapped by the fraudsters, maltreated and imprisoned for 12 days as the culprits reversed the dowry sum into a ransom for his freedom.

It took some smart thinking on the part of the Australians to convince the kidnappers that Mr. Gregor would pick up the ransom from the Canadian embassy in Bamako which lead to his freedom and living to tell the tale.

The gruesome picture of a hacked-to-bits sheep farmer who is already hacked-off by the scam does not bear scrutiny.

Ring the ding for dingo

However, let us examine the whole plot and see how many bells (Ding!) we can ring for each scam alert.

This was a twenty-something Liberian refugee living in Mali – Ding! – Considering the situation in Liberia, a refugee in Mali would probably not have ways and means or would be in a desperate situation to get out of Mali on any pretence.

He was going to get married to a lady whose name was only Natacha – Ding! – What is her family name? She might not have anyone giving her away, but she definitely would have an identity more than plain Natacha which does not look English or French, probably Russian – Ding! – The Australian authorities would have required a maiden name even though she would have been addressed as Mrs. Natacha Gregor.

Usually men pay the dowry – Ding! – If a woman or her family had such a lump sum to give away, it would not be for a lifetime of shearing sheep.

The dowry was in the sum of $86,000 – Ding! – How does a twenty-something refugee from Liberia get her hands on a sum like that to give to a man she has never met who is planning on being her husband?

You get to the airport at Bamako and your true love and beau is not there to meet you – Double Ding!! – And he probably does not have a return ticket.

Ruled by his ding

There were enough Dings in that analysis for anyone with more brains than a sheep farmer to realise that this was looking like a humongous scam of a silly wally that would get the full ridicule treatment from yours truly.

In the end, one cannot say if it was the excitement of getting under the sack with a Nubian beauty's svelte body as his manhood exhausted itself on half-price erectile dysfunction medication or the thought of getting a new sheep shearing machine with the largesse of the dowry that compelled him to fall for this scam – my countrymen would call that a Double Whammy.

I have always attributed greed to people who fall for scams like this, now; I have to add lust to the equation.

Oh! For a title to call this blog – something Australian with a twist of black beauty zest – I’ll try – Silly Dingo hooked by Nubian money boobs. I should be working for a tabloid, this is crass, but I like it. For once, Nigerians do not seem to be involved in this deception and that is good.

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