Coronavirus streets in Manchester - XII

Not a publican’s fan

The public house social event or pub as we know it, of the Englishman is one I have never adapted to because there is a history to that. As a teenager, I worked in a brewery where lager was made according to German traditions. I was in the laboratory where I conducted tests of water chlorine levels with o-Toluidine which the chemists reliably informed me was carcinogenic, though no one felt they should not be having a 15-year old kid handling that substance.

Yes, I tasted a lot of lager and the concoctions through the process, the first wort which comes from the boiling of the barley was said to be an aphrodisiac, again, you would wonder what I have needed that for, but you get told many things, people completely oblivious of the inappropriateness of it.

Maybe it was when I was to fill in my tax forms and some of my colleagues advised me to have at least two dependants. My two children of a certain age as if I were a daddy from the age of 10. In the end, I never took a liking for beer, lager, ale, or cider, considering away from the scrutiny of parental control I did have a light lager from time to time when I was much younger.

An early beer to fear

With the relaxation of the lockdown restrictions due to the Coronavirus pandemic, the government agreed on the opening of pubs from 6:00AM today. Why anyone would attend a pub at that time of the day escapes me, even if we have not had that luxury for over 3 months.

On my way out to the shops, the local pub had already opened it’s doors, the short queue forming outside were ushered in and those patrons taking up pavement space apart from the bouncer or doorman were smoking and chatting excitedly and possible beyond their regulated social bubbles.

My street was busier than usual, it was the most crowded I had seen it in months. The Mexican restaurant which had barely opened at the beginning of the year took in two customers who knocked on the door and it was apparently left open for possibly other visitors.

Neither the hotel nor the theatre at the road junction further on seemed to be ready for business yet. The local supermarket was not that busy, I had some luxury coleslaw in mind, the only thing on the shelves was the vegan variant. My head said no, instructed by misgivings, fables, and stereotypes, but I dared, and it was not that bad.

A new normalcy beckons

My first social event outside of our neighbourly soirees on Sunday and that meeting in the park would be attending the Sung Eucharist at Manchester Cathedral tomorrow, a ticketed event for which I obtained an invitation on Friday. I can only wonder if my sobriety would be afflicted by the inebriated in my path that has unfortunately not yet found their way home.

I hope that more of us are wise about the liberties we have newly acquired not to have us all go into lockdown in a fortnight. I guess we have the future to look to and the moments to cherish, some lessons learnt about who matters, what matters, with the resetting of priorities. The Coronavirus streets in Manchester and coming back to life again.

Brian Really Is Adorably Nice - IV

Daring to step up

With just under two weeks in South Africa when we parted ways, but I was not parting company, I was a bit forward in maintaining communication with him, and I initiated without asking our first long-distance interaction using WhatsApp on video.

If I had not planned to spend the New Year in Cape Town, I might have done something crazy like make an unannounced visit to Bulawayo, maybe I shouldn’t be too eager, but I knew where my heart was heading to. Every day, we exchanged messages and nightly calls, whilst I was not that inquisitive, I was learning a lot about him that heightening my admiration and respect for him.

The chance meeting we had seemed to have another touch of providence, he asked if I knew of a computer company, a very close friend and mentor who died five years before had owned it and with that came other interesting and troubling revelations that we hope will be resolved eventually in the estate and bequest of my friend to him and other parties that we have assembled to work in concert.

Again, we met up

I had decided we will meet again for Easter, the rendezvous being Johannesburg and us flying out together to Cape Town for a longer break, all tickets were booked by the end of January. The green shoots of love were growing fast, we seemed to have decided we both had something going. When Valentine’s Day came, I received the most beautiful bouquet of flowers.

How was I to know that an issue with my schedule of work would free me to pursue a passionate affair in late February? As good fortune would have it, he could take time off too and we met in Johannesburg for 10 nights. This thing called love is too beautiful for words, dreams and fantasy became my new reality.

Having no fear of missing out

Powering down and resetting goals

I get distracted, something like losing a sense of direction or some focus, it is unsettling and upsetting, but I know it is momentary, it would pass. I have learnt not to try and force things because it only yields frustration, the kind that dogs you with the feeling that certain things you could have done did not get done, all in the wake of procrastination.

Yet, in these times where there is no social activity apart from that which you create in another form of distraction to give your mind that time to rest and recalibrate to matters better absorbing, you might also get some sleep. Like I have written before, this s no time to be driven or set inordinately ambitious goals because of the availability of time, it is a better time for a complete power down and reset.

The world is going nowhere

I think like this because the world is also at a standstill, even in Formula 1 racing, if you took a pitstop, somewhere behind the leader, you probably do not expect to come out ahead, only better equipped to catch up. There is no fear of missing out [FOMO], the world is not running away.

I am learning new things, both for my career and in self-development, all at an easy pace, using the leverage of my curiosity to get beyond the immediate and exploring further to obtain enlightenment.

It goes without saying that the greatest distraction that affects me the most is the desire to somewhere with someone, in the eagerness and expectations, we harbour, we know it would be soon. I can live with that because hope is a good thing, it keeps you looking forward and looking up, who I care for will soon be in my embrace, it is a comforting and peaceful thought.

Bashful Reticent Introverted Amusing Naughty - III

Patient in impatience

The morning could not come soon enough, I must have dreamt some of the most beautiful dreams in a long time. What I could not forget was the embrace we had, it was like my body was more prescient than my head. The feeling was calming like my blood pressure had come down a good few points. Not something I could remember I felt but from 15 years before.

I was eager for the day to get on, yet I had to curb my enthusiasm. Mid-morning was the limit of my restraint when I sent a message inquiring if he slept well and was up for the lunch date. When he responded in the affirmative, I sent a cab for him as I prepared for our meeting. I had a good mind of where we should go.

Soul with a soulmate

At the hotel, we made for Melrose Arch and found a restaurant for a healthy lunch. I probably spent more of the time talking. He was reserved, he later said he was nervous all through. I was too mesmerised to notice. After lunch, we called a cab for Sandton City during which I discovered his quick wit and nothing could conceal his smile that took over his whole face.

After ice-cream at Häagen-Dazs, we returned to my hotel to relax, taking pictures before he left for his friend’s place and then for Bulawayo. I think by then, I had decided there was going to be more to our encounter, I was already planning my return to South Africa. His overnight bus trip back to Zimbabwe might have been totally inconvenienced by my messages. I think I have found a soulmate.

Thought Picnic: Be a fool, quietly

Abuse is free like air

Now, I have been at the receiving end of all kinds of abuse that it is a waste of mental energy to begin to find categories or classifications for those different types of abuse. What has mattered is how I dealt with abuse, the ones I could to run from, the ones that caused harm, the ones for which I was equipped to withstand, or the ones for which maintaining my counsel was the higher moral ground. Abuse, in the end, will not define me.

However, on reading a story and commenting on it on Twitter, I thought giving my views a bit of flesh on a blog can be useful. Some might say, having seen some of my blogs that I have opinions and many of them. I probably have many more than I have dared express and I hope that is the beginning of wisdom.

Be at home with your thinking

A football player based in Canada decided to go on a homophobic rant on Twitter, reinforcing his views with more deeply held opinions, and don’t we all have the urge to say just what is on our minds without let or hindrance? It is a free world. [Queerty: Football player goes on antigay rant, says he doesn’t care about getting fired, gets fired]

I would have felt that his being on a football team meant that he understood the rules of football and he was a good player. Also, as a Canadian resident, and I do not care to check if he is native or immigrant, this is a matter of knowing where you live. He could not have been unaware of the societal needs to accommodate diversity, no matter how diverse from his worldview.

Know when you’re mouthing away

I was a bit surprised that as a football player, he appeared not to know the difference between playing home and playing away. I would even aver that, in Canada, when expressing homophobia, you're quite dangerously playing away and not at home where your supporters would cheer you on to score a goal.

Basically, as I continued my Twitter thread, I stated, there are certain antics you never get up to when playing away, the consequences of which might be dire and grave for your team and the little troop of supporters that showed up for the away game. Therein is my lesson in football etiquette.

The unerring winds of social backlash

We live in times of the instant consequence for the slightest infractions, not to talk of the gravest sins of commission that would land in the docket of the unforgivable. By all means, you are free to have any opinion, it takes another force of providence, insight, intuition, or just reticence to realise you just need the discipline not to express every opinion you have.

I concluded, speaking more to myself than to others, in terms of expressing views that are discriminatory, exclusionary, or hateful, know the law of the land, the sway of moral outrage, and anticipate the unerring winds of social backlash that can dispossess you of your livelihood and make you a pariah. Be a fool quietly. Be not intrigued, I write first to adjure myself, whether it relates to others can only be an unfortunate coincidence.

Beginning Reaction Indication Affinity Notable - II

The chance for change

Strangely, I was not looking for anything, I was just on holiday in the sun during Christmas, a pleasure I last enjoyed on the beautiful environs of Taj Mahal some 7 years before. However, I could not excuse myself from this handsome man who initiated the conversation when I thought I had no prospect of a passing glance.

When we got to the bar and ordered drinks, we began to chat to each other, the topics veering from the serious to the trivial, punctuated with laughter and increasing affinity. I was a bit crestfallen when he said he was returning to Zimbabwe the next day, but it was significant to know that his journey would be late at night.

The lurch for lunch

Maybe, it was an opportunity or an opening, I seized it and invited him for lunch the next day, having exchanged numbers and making to leave. As we were leaving at the same time, his friend offered to give me a lift back to my hotel, which I gladly took. The further engagement on the trip to my hotel consolidated the prospect.

In a few hours, I have developed a liking for him. When he introduced himself, I asked if his name was ‘Brian with an I’, it could have been Bryan. Before I went to bed, I send a long message of appreciation and thanks for meeting him. I did not forget to remind him; we were going out for lunch the next day. Could it be I was falling in love?

Belief Review Interest Anticipation New - I

Then came a plan

I think about the time I helplessly fell in love at the end of December 2018. The trip I made to South Africa was one that had been on my mind for months, but it was difficult to plan for. As the year closed, I was put on a new regimen of pills that simply messed up everything normal about me and then I underwent a procedure that required a two-week rest, especially from air travel.

Immediately, after the rest, I was in Germany for work and it was there that I decided, if I did not take that holiday, I risked regretting it. I jetted out on Christmas Eve and arrived in Johannesburg on Christmas Day. Meanwhile, I was back on my old pills and feeling good in myself.

Mona Lisa is mine

Three days later, I saw this amazing person, not that I dared approach because he just looked like he would have eyes for something else. I resigned myself to the equanimity of a museum visitor. You can view Mona Lisa, but you cannot take it off the wall and walk home with it.

Reticent and shy as he suggests he is, he was the one who made the first move, saying Hello and that was the beginning of history. I just had a crazy thought that for the days until his birthday, which is the 7^th of July, I might just write something about falling in love.