Holiday snaps: A lounge to lunge from

An apology, I say

If anything, the “lounge” at the Madrid Barajas International Airport is a complete let-down, it exudes the worst of Spanish hospitality and comfort.

The furniture that probably looked cool years ago is dated, the fittings are cheap, the sockets are broken and falling apart, the choice of snacks leave much to be desired and to add insult to injury, one has to pay for wireless access.

Apart from the peace and quiet from the hustle and bustle of the airport terminal below, one can easily sit elsewhere with ear-plugs and be at peace.

Just not up to scratch

For a capital city airport, it is appalling, but then, I have been to the lounge at the Barcelona airport too and really, that takes the concept of lounges to a new depth of despair, it is the equivalent of the Ryanair of air travel comfort.

A bargain basement allocation of space for travellers to swear never to visit again; even if offered a bye to enter on the cheapest class of air travel available. Generally functional, rudimentary to the core and primitive at best.

I am surprised that there has been no clamour to get the managers of these lounges to polish up their act, with all the resorts and holiday locations the Spaniards squandered billions on in the property boom, upgrading these lounges to the healthy status of Spanish friendliness and comfort should have been a doddle.

Lunge from this lounge

It is not like one wants to spent the whole day here for any reason when you are on your way somewhere, either waiting to depart from Madrid or in transit through Madrid.

On the ratings scale my verdict is, the Madrid Barajas Airport lounge is a lounge to lunge from, probably headlong too.

Holiday, it is

Last-minute shuffle

In order not to be at a loose end in July after that sudden suspension of the project I was in, I decided to make the best of the free time offered, take a holiday.

Everything was so last-minute that I could do nothing on the Internet but seek a travel agent to arrange the whole deal for me.

As usual, I am doing nothing new, rather, I am returning to places I have been before where they know my name, my eccentricities and I know what to expect without surprises – hopefully, I do not have to comment on how things might have changed for the worse.

I have to be back in Amsterdam before the 23^rd of the month because I am off to Berlin for a friend’s wedding; everything just seemed in flux that after 2 hours of shuffling and re-arranging we finally got the flights and hotel sorted out for departure on Sunday morning.

Weights and scales

They have all these weight restrictions about baggage, no single piece of check-in baggage is supposed to be heavier than 23kg as if we have industrial scales at home to ensure the stuff is not overweight.

Bathroom scales are hardly sufficient because of the small footprint and even with a digital and an analogue scale placed side by side you still end up with something not as clear as it should be.

I kept the analogue scales to deal with disputes when the reality of heaving bulk reveals a number so high that the bearer of the weight is in complete denial, the number of times they have stepped off the digital scales and been offered the confirmation of the analogue scale readings has been sobering and the opening for a weight-loss jibe.

In my case, I am supposed to put on more weight because these is needed to help my medication work amongst other medical issues that accompany having once had cancer.

I got to the airport easily, checked-in my baggage which came in at 23.1kg, probably that extra pair of socks and made for fast-track customs check.

Scrub the holiday music

The Privium lounge for those of us who use the iris-scan system is not open in the weekends, so I had to settle for the less classy KLM lounge where I have another 65 minutes of waiting before boarding.

The annoying piece of music going on in my head comes from the conservation I had with my friend last night, Cliff Richard’s Summer Holiday which I am trying to scrub out with Madonna’s Holiday, not that I like either but well, with 20 years between them, it is time for a more contemporary holiday song, something radical rather than hip-hop or rap; in any case, I am off on holiday.

And guess what? As I made for the airport, I realised I had left my camera at home, but the binoculars are in the portmanteau. I will still capture the scenes and memories, one way or the other, I think.