Sunday 13 February 2011

Thought Picnic: Stop goading my horses

The warriors for my soul

It is hard to battle with those who are warriors for one’s soul. Their concern becomes so intrusive that it begins to breed contempt and sometimes resentment.

The concept of minding their own business never occurs to them and your life becomes their cause, your decision not to acquiesce to their views or notion of what they think you should be becomes a source of friction.

Abuse is hurled at you as if you have no say in your own matters, you have become their property and they believe it is within their rights to domineer you until you succumb, they will not relent.

They cannot be engaged, talk less of be persuaded of need to back off, you are stalked and terrorised that only your obstinacy keeps you from succumbing.

Yield an inch and you are assimilated though the give was to get a breather from the suffocating pressure brought to bear on you by their views of what you should represent.

So you see, think you know?

Calmly, one had to respond to a message the other day that started with the view that my picture was not the best one to display, not that this person has access to my cache of pictures to make the right selection for me, well, I am happy with how I portray myself and I change that portrayal at my whim and at my will.

It went on to suggest and I quote, “I also think you could channel some of this your energy to …” obviously, that is an opinion unsolicited and rather uncalled for – it just grates.

Obviously, beyond the frailty observed in the picture there is some recognition that one has energy but it is expended in areas the observer does not feel is of the greatest benefit to both me and others.

I do have to take prescriptions for medicine and they are many but to take prescriptions for how my energies should be channelled no matter how good-intentioned is more like asking that I swallow a gob-stopper as a pill.

It is hard enough keeping my wild chariot of life in lane, stop goading my horses to go faster.


CodLiverOil said...

Ah Akin
What you describe is quite common amongst my "uncles and aunts", not to mention "religious Nigerians". They ultimately know what is best for you. They are so "perfect", they feel it is their duty to share this "wisdom" with you.

This intrusive and patronising attitude can only be countered with a blunt put down followed by disassociation. Being polite and diplomatic only encourages them.

Some use the lamest excuse for this uncalled for intrusion, like they have more gray hair than you (unless they have resorted to dying it to present a youthful image). Others use other lame excuses to intrude.

Either way stand your ground, or you'll end up as a mindless drone, hanging on every word that comes from their mouths.

Akin Akintayo said...

Hello CodLiverOil,

I had to deal with religious and younger, all cloaked in love and concern.

If it were not so irksome already.


Post a Comment

Comments are accepted if in context are polite and hopefully without expletives and should show a name, anonymous, would not do. Thanks.