The heart of desire always matters

Desire is not a luxury

There is a sense that there are luxuries one cannot afford in relation to certain circumstances that one might find oneself in. Yet, it is without debate that one is probably best equipped to face some issues in the company of the closest companion a person has, where intimacy and trust give the impetus and courage to attend and apprehend.

What cannot be discounted is the wanting, probably the wishing, yea the longing, indeed the craving, and definitely the yearning, all the synonyms of desire playing in strength and force to a state of compulsive demand in groaning and supplication for fulfilment.

It is so quickly dismissed as unimportant, like you should put desire aside for the pertinent, like desire is shirking attention to the essential, something you cannot afford to put out there in the light of prevailing issues.

Desire makes us human

Then I look back through the times and find that the stability of having someone with whom there is commitment without conflict has served as a first the grounding and then the springboard to leap into the unknown to experience adventure, wonder, and excitement.

For everyone who has a companion, the closeness to each other makes for the fundamental bolstering of emotion and temperament for purpose and challenge. People can help and do so much for you, but that person with whom love is shared for intimacy and desire excites a passion in the pursuit of happiness and the joy of living that words cannot so easily express.

Desire matters, even the divine understands that man has desires, deeply held yearnings of want and desire that in lovingkindness, tender mercies and amazing grace are granted beyond the wildest dreams of the supplicant. The heart’s desire is part of what confirms us as men, nothing would please me more than to face each day together with Brian, knowing that together, we are more than a formidable team.

I know there is strength and support in the company of those whom you love; to face issues. Every good desire is like fuel to light the flame of hope creating a reality for which in accomplishment every sound that escapes our lips can only be of thankfulness and gratitude for times that have become so kind.

Boy weakness when man strength is required

What am I to do?

It is probably one of those feelings of helpless abandon when one is overcome with some incapacity or infirmity, the inability to complete a task.

Earlier this evening I thought of putting together another concoction with my NutriBullet blender, I almost foresaw the end of my impending pleasure as I screwed on the blade assembly to the beaker, that last twist did it.

I had meticulously taken off the hard brown skin of the coconut pieces just to use the white solid of the coconut, poured in milk, then vanilla yoghurt, some garlic flakes, almond flakes and hulled sesame seeds.

I thought of adding some organic honey but forgot and screwed the assembly shut and set it on the NutriBullet blender for a few minutes. In the last week, I have had a few portions of this delicious food-drink for dinner and liked it.

For now, I can’t do it

However, my frustration is compounded by the fact that for the past 90 minutes I have been unable to unscrew the assembly and have my drink. I even tried putting the assembly in hot water without must success, it is all plastic.

Progressively, I have realised that my grip and twisting strength has been failing to be efficacious at the first few tries, but this has been the worst experience of realising I cannot do a simple domestic activity and yet it is no one to call in the emergency services.

I probably will get to open it eventually, though I have one had a lady in the house do what essentially we would expect a man to do without a fuss. I have my weaknesses and really, I am not afraid to ask for help, it gets difficult things done.

Postscript:

I thought of this over an hour ago, I finally donned my Roeckl leather gloves which are stowed away for the winter, this gave me the grip I needed for the twisting action I required. I will have the pleasure of the food-drink and have this in mind for the next time.

Nigeria: To a boy most things are forgiven, but to a man, more is expected

An education without history

As the Germans destroyed the assumed mythical status of Brazilian football with a 7 – 1 rout, we all took to Twitter, sharing wit, puns, jokes and memes, some funny, others not so, but the whole atmosphere was marred by a rather tasteless and ‘stupid’ tweet.

I do not intend to reproduce that tweet here because it reeks of odium unparalleled that words fail me.

Now, the perpetrator is a young and rising star in the Nigerian political system, many of us just between what might be the uncle to the parent age with reference to him have found reasons to commend and respect him for his achievements.

In many cases, we may not have been in agreement, but there has been no reason to be disagreeable, he has always held his official brief well and that is worthy of every recognition.

Looking for mitigating circumstances

Yet, having changed masters from a demur Sports and Youth Federal Minister to one who with the brief of Minister of State of Defence whose supposed education and political experience fails to reflect in his tactless and somewhat undiplomatic screeches on Twitter about terrorism in Nigeria, I fear that some of that doltishness has rubbed off on him.

In an unguarded moment, he tweeted what would not be heard in polite society in Europe for as far as the eye can see and this repugnant phrase has not been heralded in public settings since April 30^th 1945.

Ears are for listening

Immediately, those who cared called it out, and this is where you know a man; one with character, one with principle and dare I say, one with integrity. When a fault or wrong is pointed out, not as a voice of common antagonism, but one of clear reason and reasonableness, you reflect, review and gracefully regret error.

Sadly, he dug in, with obduracy, obstinacy and bewildering stupidity, flailing with bluster and braggadocio as a typical Nigerian politician blown adrift like a rainless cloud because it is not anchored in the realism of truth and facts.

Boy came out of the man

Maybe I am being overly harsh on the boy, because I as a boy, he can be excused many things, a lack of knowledge of history which in a man we would call ignorance, a lack of the ability to reflect, which in a man we would call arrogance, and the inability to say sorry, which in a boy would be a clear sign of immaturity.

Worst still, I would hate to extrapolate this event and suggest that many of the youth that I follow and engage with on many forums are prone to this absentmindedness of the powerful to realise that one does stoop to conquer, that one is wise to know that when in a hole you stop digging and that being regretful and sorry is hardly as sign of weakness, but one of strength, even if it is not obvious to the person involved.

One still hopes

Yet, one of the greater qualities of youthfulness is not one of aging but in the ability to learn, the presence of a teachable spirit and to know that one can change if a path to being better is found.

Yesterday, I tweeted extensively about A Man for All Seasons, the character analysis of Sir Thomas More contrasted with Richard Rich with the somewhat reactionary William Roper in the middle of some very insightful exchanges, the subject like one handed a rope to save himself has pulled towards Rich than towards More.

I close with one of the tweets I posted on the issue. “It is amazing what seemingly inconsequential things show the true integrity and character of a man and it can be so damaging.” It needn’t have needed much commentary; to a boy all is forgiven for out of him might grow a man of all seasons, but to a man, much more is expected lest he be judged a man of no season.

I recommend anyone entering politics or anyone and battling with issues of conscience, duty and allegiance consider watching A Man for All Seasons (Film), on Amazon (DVD) and (Streaming).

Thought Picnic: An island, I am not, I call to be heard

No man is an island, entire of itself;

Every man is a piece of the continent,

A part of the main;

If a clod be washed away by the sea,

Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were,

As well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were;

Any man's death diminishes me,

Because I am involved in mankind,

And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls;

It tolls for thee.

Excerpted from Devotions Upon Emergent Occasions - MEDITATION XVII - John Donne

I live amongst many

I have in no way experienced the myriad of illnesses, misfortune or adversity that John Donne suffered in his lifetime, but his words speak to me as of someone whose wisdom and manner of words are a deep well of resourceful material in understanding our mankind.

Much as I have striven to live a very independent life to the point to pretending to some sort of unique individuality, I have by reason and by circumstance come to know that no man is an island.

The help beyond I

No, for the things I have seen and the things I have known have come with interaction, be it knowledge that I gain daily from things to improve my skills to other sources of communal interaction that thrive more in the virtual space than in human-to-human contact.

However, I live today because a part of the main, in prayer, in medical help, in support from others have sustained me beyond where the strength I bring to bear on any situation is exhausted.

I hope that when help is required of me, I will be both resourced and willing to stand with another as they have stood with me through thick and thin.

The death of reason

For any man’s death diminished me, for we must strive to prevent what is preventable that the fellowship we have might not be extinguished by forces beyond our control.

It is not so much the death at the end of life that bothers me as the death of reason, the death of the reasonable and the death of reasonableness. For where we have disagreed, we must strive never to be disagreeable and where our beliefs have been at variance we must respect where we stand to accommodate the fact that we cannot all believe the same.

Allow me my thoughts

My thinking might be judged absurd but spare me a moment for I might have not reached the destination you are at and if the vehicle of persuasion cannot move in the direction where you want me to be, I might have taken a different road leading to another place.

We are on a journey where there are very few stops and many things in motion, we go forwards, we go backwards and might get knocked sideways but are rarely stationary. It is the life in motion until the day the bell tolls.

Talk to someone

And on that day when it all seems to end, may the relationships you have built over a lifetime – long or short, be an enduring memory that you once walked the earth, a part of our shared humanity, elated by the living of others as you have been diminished by the death of some.

For no man is an island, marooned from the essence of our humankind. We must talk to each other of our joys and our pains because the eyes of another might well see the things that have blinded us in the maelstrom of circumstances that swirl around us.

Refrigerant notice: Take dog to vet and dig hole for man

Drink like the last

I was offered a glass of coca cola after a long day in the heat wave that has engulfed England for the past few weeks.

Cool it was, especially that it contained ice to lower the temperature of the drink and give it the semblance of refreshing refreshment that I needed.

From the first sip, I noticed the ice was not melting as one would expect, rather, it was as if a new state of water was being synthesised in my glass, somewhere between solid and liquid, small globules of ice presenting a form of gel.

A new state of water

I started asking questions, about the ice as I downed the refreshing cola wondering what could have given the ice such a characteristic I had never observed before.

When I finished the cola, it became evident that this was not ice as I had always known it and perchance I happened on the packaging from whence the ice came, a product it was and the small print read, “Not for human consumption and not good for the dog either” or as I read it, take to the dog to the vet and dig a hole for the man.

Apparently, unbeknownst to my host, an ice pack had been crushed into my drink, the ice pack being colourless rather than having a blue tinge meant we were no wiser about it.

Refrigerant for the cool

Then I was on the Internet to find out what I needed to do, have the nurse perform the Heimlich Manoeuvre by putting his knee into my back, sticking my finger up my throat unhinging the peristaltic stability of what I had ingested or just wait it out.

Thankfully, the refrigerant component of the ice pack was not harmful and did not present a medical emergency of any sort, there was no need to panic and I was not on the verge of the discovery of a new state of gelatinous aqua much as I kept my calm not to be driven to the histrionics of suggesting I was about to be poisoned.

Makes for a good story though because, for my afternoon drink I asked for some refrigerant, what the heat will make you do, the consequences are yet to be imagined. 

Thought Picnic: Debunking the myth of the man of God

Always a man first

Two very recent news stories should hopefully get Nigerian thinking about the “Man of God” syndrome that fill them with a vague dread of the supernatural as they abrogate their personal intellectual responsibility and sink into placid docility when interacting with such people.

Yesterday, we read of the sad news that an internationally renowned church leader had admitted sexual offences [1] one of sexually molesting a boy of 14 and another of sexually assaulting a 21-year old man.

I had written previously that the sexually molested as children face an almost insurmountable obstacle to bringing forward their accusations and making such allegations stick, in the case of the older man, the force of authority might well have numbed him into submission.

The myth of infallibility

In both cases, it can be argued that the victims only found the means of levelling these accusations after they left the congregation of the accused.

I do appreciate in the many heated conversations I had on Facebook on this matter, what was passing for giving the church leader the benefit of doubt was really disbelief that this could have happened and every other reason for this situation was thrown into the discussion but the fact that child sexual abuse is a problem that we are shy and reticent to address.

This ranged from the victims being completely invisible, through the “Man of God” being falsely accused to suggesting that institutional racism was still prevalent in the UK police establishment.

Now that the “Man of God” has admitted the offences, it was still interesting to read that some still had more concern for his ministry and congregation and very little mention was made of the victims of his abuse.

The need for earned trust

In the other story, a businesswoman had accused a pastor of defrauding her [2] of a large sum of money and that case is now in court.

I find it incredible that this lady being business savvy as she was broke every business logic known to good business deals by paying money upfront for services she was to provide just because she was advised that the new business partner she had acquired was a “respectable Man of God.”

In fact, I would dare say, a fool and their money are soon parted because it is unlikely that she built her business on being this stupid by not doing due diligence on the people she was dealing with and ensuring her side of the deal was fully protected before committing to the deal.

These are people like us

The epithet of “Man of God” should not be a blind-siding impediment to seeing as one status on Facebook averred, every “Man of God” is a man first and then has a vocation that is of God, if that is really that case.

The man is not superhuman, whilst being held to higher standards of principle and virtue, they are not infallible and they have not by reason of being “Men of God” suddenly metamorphosed from man to God.

They are like you and I, flesh and blood, filled with the same kind of desires and frailties; maybe with a bit more self-control, restraint and appreciation of the weight of responsibility that we have but they do not in that setting acquire extra heads, more limbs and perform feats of superhuman prowess like comic heroes.

We should believe the best of everyone, especially those that minister but with all the trust we repose in such people there is nothing wrong in verifying that trust, ascertaining they as individuals are of impeccable character and that they have earned the status accorded them not by the blanket “Man of God” moniker but by reason of building the particular relationships of trust that we do in our everyday lives with other people.

Character matters more than vocation

It is time we looked beyond people who used God to gain confidence, whose usage of God is to short-circuit the deep scrutiny they should be subjected to as we think attending the same religious entity or adhering to similar belief systems automatically means they are perfect and we allow the slightest doubt or premonition to go without research and justification.

We ignore that little voice to our peril and come a cropper because as the businesswoman has done and one can only imagine how much she would have dealt with her conscience and struggled with her faith before she took up the courage to report her business partners which included a respectable man of God to the law.

We need to search out the character of these people, the basic virtues of truth, honesty, integrity, probity and references from others who already exhibit such good virtues must always matter, first and always.

The hold of superstition

The inordinate fear of challenging “men of God” must come from our animist backgrounds, being schooled in superstition we learnt of the instant retribution of animist gods for breaking rules or breaching taboos, we have not carried this notion of instant retribution to monotheistic gods and their “so-called” representatives allowing our numbness and stupidity before such people to be taken for humility and respect.

If we place men far above where they are in their humanity, mortality and frailty, we only have ourselves to blame for not separating the man from God and seeing the man first, then the God in the man, if that really be the case.

It does not mean every “Man of God” is a crook, but every one of them is first human and then godly, the humanity never changes to deity – Not in this world, if there ever was such a hope.

It is time to break the myth of the “Man of God” and it starts with using our heads and intellect in dealing with people as everyday ordinary people.

Sources

[1] International preacher Odulele admits sex offences - Channel 4 News

[2] Woman accuses pastor of N6.6m fraud | Daily Times Nigeria

Thought Picnic: Using a putdown as a bridal bouquet

Starting with the alphabet

It is usually amusing to have to try and break down into fundamental parts the writings on my blog for the comprehension of people who do not bother to read and understand the points I am trying to convey.

I would be the first to admit that my writing hardly caters for the lowest common denominator of language or expression but I do take my time to clearly state my views and when controversial find a sense of balance.

There is no doubt that there are people who feel that the withdrawal of the Nigerian football teams from international competitions by the President is wrong – what has been missing from their clamour are clear reasons why they think he was wrong.

Scavengers are vermin

My blog on Questioning the FIFA Hegemony yesterday was written to offer exceptions to the FIFA rule of no political interference in national football associations with clearly documented examples of Togo, France and Nigeria.

A good blogging friend decided to highlight my blog as an excellent piece on Facebook and before you knew it, vultures descended on it, dismissed it out of hand and offered no objective counterpoint to the views raised.

That is what I find most irksome, seemingly intelligent people who yap and bark rather than foster an atmosphere for discourse with constructive input.

Distracted by a lack of comprehension

So, it was only right for me to suggest that certain readers might have been distracted by a lack of comprehension so evident from their comments to which one responded without first wondering if he really had missed the context of my blog by suggesting what I had written was stupidity beyond words, he had earlier said I was talking trash.

That left me with no other option but to state that the blog could not be recomposed on Facebook to accommodate intellect below par all by reason of the fact that the exchanges did not address with any sense of understanding of the matters raised in my blog.

In some ways, my less than courteous statements were flung out like a bridal bouquet and the over-exuberant bridesmaid made a lunge for it tripping over her shoes.

As a matter of principle, I never set out to patronise anyone nor do I enjoy the prospect of belittling people either, but when such persons make a blatant show of common breeding unworthy of gentlemen, it simply sets the stage for a gentle English putdown; the sad end of the tale is what once looked like a man is really a boy – and boys rarely ever understand when men speak.

The wonder of a man and his maid(en)

Too wonderful for me

I can only reflect on these sayings of the man of Proverbs.

From the King James Version – Proverbs 30:18-19

There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not:

The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.

The first two are elements of nature and still a matter of wonder, the soaring of the eagle and the time it took for man to master the science and art of flight which still fills me with a bit of wonder, as for the serpent on a rock, we do not have a vehicle that glides over terrain the way the serpent does.

The way of a ship in the midst of the sea is now a no-brainer except when you lose power for satellite navigation and you have not learnt to use the sextant – but for people of those times – getting from one place to another mostly using sails still remains a wonder of seamanship.

The warmth of companionship

The last however is a dynamic that still defies explanation, what is between the man and his woman is just not something you can get instruments out to measure.

I learnt years ago that one should never interfere in that dynamic, it is a force that can be both overpowering and endearing, I have had opportunity to observe the Prince and his Princess, the husband and the wife, the boyfriend and the girlfriend, the boy and the girl and always been overcome with wonder.

Yesterday, I was out to Puerto Rico, one of the coastal towns of Gran Canaria where the ode to the built-environment reads like a thousand stanzas of concrete verse. All the hills built into with white beautiful and ugly hotels just because Europeans of temperate and arctic climes seek warmth in the sun on a European island as far South of Europe as possible.

Big brother

As I walked back with the bus stop with ice-cream cone in hand, he said, “Would you like an ice-cream”, she said, “Oh! Yes, please”. They were probably in their sixties and full of fun – the Prince was playing big-brother, it looked and sounded so nice, though I did not expect to see them skipping hand-in-hand to the beach.

Playmates

Then, you wonder why the older generations go to dance classes, I could answer that question – they were dancing the night away – waltzing, fox-trotting, tangoing and whatever makes ballroom dancing exciting.

The decorum of this kind of dancing sweeps away from sight the grotesque antics of embarrassing middle-aged dancers. The Prince and Princess were playmates – I could not dance with myself, I need to consider dancing lessons too.

Protector

Walking through the nature reserve of Maspalomas, one can walk the dunes bare-footed but on the firmer ground of dried plants with footpaths to negotiate, there are dangers. Double-sided prickly disc-like seeds which adhere firmly to your shoes or sandals – the preferred footwear in those places – so, this couple were on an adventure to encounter pain when I warned them of the dangers.

The Prince answered back gruffly, obviously slighted by the fact that I may have pointed out that his was leading his Princess into danger. The Protector was not really being smart. Maybe afterwards, after picking out the barbs from her soles, kissing it better might salve the pain – I interfered.

Patriarch

The restaurant serves a buffet, which means people have to walk around the food tables to get what they like. In most cases, they walk around, have brief chats about the food and then make their choices before returning together to their tables.

However, there were some Princes who were too princely to walk around, their Princesses did all the running around and served their masters who almost expressed impatience for the lateness of the plate and dismissively waited for the plates to be cleared. The man does have a maid here, reminds me of a cheeky comment someone made when he asked if I had laid the maid, (talking about my cleaner) some people can never attain comportment. Oh! There were quite a few Patriarchs in the house and these are Europeans.

Partners

They were looking for the beach promenade and had walked around in circles till someone decided to ask questions – they even had a 5-month old boy in the pram shielded from the sun because you could not really apply sun-tan lotion on the skin of a toddler.

In fact, it was he, who asked the question about directions and I found out that unlike the commonly accepted view that the men never ask for directions, in this dynamic, it was the lady who would never ask for directions.

They shared the joy of helping each other; he pushed the pram through the difficult terrain of pavements without ramps for wheelchairs or trolleys as we walked to the promenade and all the way down to the Playa del Ingles beach where we parted ways. The Prince and Princess were partners.

A-Partners

The last night, he literally wailed as she began to put a distance between herself and him by running. He said, “You find their jokes funnier than mine”. Any Princess would be to rid of such a pathetic Prince. Somehow, there is still a dynamic at work, there is still an attraction that manages to tolerate the insecurity, but would this go on for much longer? The Prince and Princess were beginning to look like A-Partners.

A-partners, coined by the Sun newspaper to describe couples who get on well after separation.

The veil amongst Christians

The head scarf debate

As we settle into what would be a debate for a long time in the West about head scarves, veils, the hijab, coverings and exposures, I remember quite poignantly that this debate has been around for quite a while.

Some 20-something years ago, this debate was going around in evangelical circles, this was not just contentious but frustrating that what was so explicitly discussed in the Bible still left some selecting what they wanted to believe to support their prejudices.

Not, only so, people of other religions also select portions of biblical scripture to support their views completely out of context of the truth that was being portrayed.

Selecting Bible choice cuts

In the Bible, 1 Corinthians 11:3-16 (King James Version), gives the complete low-down on this issue, but it would take an open mind and fresh eyes to appreciate the context and direction of this passage.

The keys to this discourse are in verses 3 and 16, but the 3^rd verse usually gets misunderstood and the 16^th verse conveniently left out of the discourse for reasons I can never understand.

I would take particular verses and break them down for the purposes of furthering this debate, there are other meanings with regards to relationships in here, which I would not cover, but I would clearly contextualise because it is used to foster abuse.

Separating every man from the husband

3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

What we need to note here is the article and possession, it says the head of every man is Christ, however, NOT that the head of every woman is man.

The woman using the definite article pertains to a single woman in relationship to a man, her husband. Every man anywhere cannot just lord it over any woman, he can only do that, in a relationship that is a marriage.

In another blog, on the more emotive issue of wife-battering, I covered how the husband has to be as selfless as Christ to be able to exercise any kind of authority where they believe themselves to masters of their homes and be able to throw their weight around the place.

What is clear is a woman outside the relationship of marriage automatically has Christ as her head, when she has her man, the dynamic of headship changes to her husband.

It is a difficult one, but man in general consists first of male and female; in this case, there is no conferment of the complete servitude of the female sex to any to every man born on earth – it would be illogical.

Traditions and customs might support this dynamic of making all women in society less of the male, but it is not supported in Christianity to give man husband-status to every woman except his truly wedded wife.

Who covers whom?

4 Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.

Here, it is clear that this refers to man as male.

5 But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.

This uses every woman, but the possibility of two heads, if unmarried, her head is Christ and if married her head is her husband – NOT every man.

6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.

If a woman would not cover her head, she should shave, but if shaving is considered a shame, she should then cover her head.

7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.

Once again, the definite article is here, the woman (wife) is the glory of the man (husband). We do not go around presenting every woman as our wife, rather, there is one woman who takes that pride of place, and we adorn her and present her with pride and honour her with love and devotion.

8 For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man.

9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

This takes us back to the Adam and Eve story, where Eve was crafted from the rib of Adam as his helper and companion. The definite article also features here – the man (husband) and the woman (wife).

The woman’s prerogative

10 For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.

Now, this fouls up every authority man tries to exercise over the woman because it says it is the prerogative of the woman to decide on whether to cover her head or not. There is no duty of man to impose this on the woman.

This is usually read as the man ought to have power of the head of every woman and force them to appear in a wifely role or subservient role.

For many, the Scripture ENDS here, reading any further is too inconvenient.

Co-dependence of the sexes and equality

11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.

12 For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God.

Equality in the church and equality before God, so where did all this male domination come from?

So, no one would like to read beyond verse 10 because to serious home truths break down the male domination fortress.

13 Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?

Well, this is question of traditions and customs; there are places where women can be covered and others where woman do not get covered – debate.

The long hair day

14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?

Touché – men with long hair have no say in this matter, they need to deal with their issues.

15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.

Oh! Apostle Paul does begin to complicate issues by clarifying them. There is a separation between the head and the hair introduced from verse 14 and the reference is now to long hair.

It appears, if a woman has long hair, she already has a covering for her head – it is a no-brainer that hair does grow out of the head - she does not need an artificial covering like a scarf.

Well, why do we have all this fuss about scarves when the hair already covers the head?

16 But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God.

If this becomes a contentious topic, drop it, we have not taken on any traditions or customs of head covering, hair covering or even male domination – it is not the way of the church.

And all the men say … Amen!

Page turning and sick making

Of children and young men

As the scandal of emails and instant messages threatens to engulf the Republican campaign to great detriment, I begin to wonder what the facts are and how they are being portrayed.

In a question directed to the Speaker of the House of Representatives, the interviewer starts with – “This 16-year old boy who is the young man affected …” the Speaker answers with – “The young man …”

Herein, is the confusion, is the person a child, a boy, a youth, a young man or a man? He is all of that and more.

My voice breaks

There is no doubt that he is an adolescent, which does not make him an adult, he is a teenager and definitely a child of someone – I think it all now depends on the way you look at it.

In terms of criminal responsibility, he is not a child, in terms of sexual development he can father a child, in the scheme of things, he is a boy, as a page, he is a youth, in terms of prospects, he is a young man and when grouped he is a teenager.

In terms of the relationship, he was abused by reason of the exchange between a man of authority and responsibility, had the messages been exchanged between peers, it would have been without event apart from a frank exchange of views involving the headmaster.

At 16, I would have taken offence if anyone had referred to me as a boy or a child, I was already out of secondary school and in polytechnic, though, I had to show my birth certificate because they did not believe I was that young, normally people finished secondary school at 18, my sister finished at 14.

Adults of shame

Anyway, the sad thing developing out of this sad saga of predatory acts against boys, children or young men is the squabble between National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) which has released an amended statement on Mark Foley’s resignation and the National Law Center for Children and Families (NLC) over which organisation is too tightly linked with Congress and who came up with the best ideas for finding missing children.

There is the quality of life of a boy at stake here and the adults of responsibility either in offence or defence are scoring political points against each other – that, I must say is childish. It is all becoming sick-making – I need to see all that food and drink again – Urrggh!

Back to the child, I just hope he is well and well left alone with the support he needs to get on with his life.

Mark Foley on Bill Clinton

Finally, is this the same Mark Foley who said 8 years ago of Bill Clinton during the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal “It's vile, it's more sad than anything else, to see someone with such potential throw it all down the drain because of a sexual addiction.”?

Glass houses and stones seem to have met with a resounding clatter and shatter – how are the mighty fallen. ‘Nuff said.

References

Report: Foley allegedly tried to meet page

Foley's Behaviour No Secret on Capitol Hill