Holiday Snaps: Loro Parque, Tenerife

Tripping to another island

The day trip to Tenerife is now a constant feature of my holidays to Gran Canaria where I have the choice of visiting Loro Parque or just doing a tour of the island.

The port of Santa Cruz de Tenerife is just a 70 minute boat ride from Puerto de las Nieves on the north-eastern coast of Gran Canaria, but this all takes a lot out of you.

I felt going to Loro Parque was essential especially for my friend who was having his first package holiday at a seaside resort. At least to prove the point that there was more besides sun, sea, sand and sometimes sex.

We had already visited Las Palmas de Gran Canaria, the capital city of the island of Gran Canaria and between fable, legend and truth, gone to the Christopher Columbus house purportedly resided in, which is now a museum. The view is that most trips to the New World as it then known passed through the Canary Islands.

Off to Tenerife

For Tenerife, we got a wake-up call at 5:15AM having been out most of the night, we were somnambulists for the hours that followed. Though we had planned for an early breakfast at 5:30AM, we had no stomach for such.

The shuttle bus to take us to the port arrived around 6:20AM and the sooner that I got in my seat, I attempted a half slumber and for the journey between Playa del Inglés and the Las Palmas, the chaperone allowed us some peace to catch some shut-eye.

I noticed a few changes to the scheduling, the trip was better planned, we were given hints to what shows to see and the best order to maximise the usage of our time at Loro Parque. The ferry was an hour earlier and it also meant we returned in enough time to make dinner back at the hotel.

Our chaperone was a chatterbox extraordinaire, he switched between 4 languages with ease and repeated his advice in as many ways possible that the stupid would be highly enlightened, yet there were times I wished I had travelled with my ear plugs, for I was on the verge of telling him shut up for a nanosecond and give our eardrums a rest from the din.

The shows

The sea was calm, the journey easy and we were at Loro Parque just before 11:00AM, and we made for Orca World where we were to see killer whales in performance. Though the show as to start at 11:30, the arena was quite full some 15 minutes to the start.

The orca whale is really not a whale, it is a dolphin and yet apex predators. These creatures are huge and could measure up to 6 metres long.

The handlers do not get in the water with the orcas as they do with the dolphins that are much smaller or even the lion seals.

Though Loro Parque was created for parrots, parakeets, cockatoos and birds of that family group, it is essentially a zoo, but one of significance for the rarity of the animals, their conservation efforts and the documentation that accompanies their exhibits.

And then

We attended the orca and dolphin shows, but decidedly missed the sea lion show, at the dolphin show, I learnt something new, how to determine the sex of dolphins and what to do if I encounter a beached or stranded dolphin.

The service at the publicised restaurant for which we had vouchers for a discounted price for a set meal was perfunctory to the point of almost appalling.

The waiters at Patio del Loro looked like if they smiled they might have a terminal cardiac arrest, even I could not wish a smile for them, lest it became an emergency. I left a tip, well the tip was, please find ways to smile. As for the bill, it was not a penny more and not a penny less than what the bill said.

Much as literally every venue in Spain displays the WiFi free logo, nothing is as annoying as to find that the service is poor to the point that you could not connect. My view was that Loro Parque did not add enough capacity to handle the crowds that throng the place. I would rather they did not have the service than have signs everywhere and yet not deliver.

Holiday Snap: A granny for a penny

Getting busy doing holiday

Coming into our fourth day of holiday, we have been taking things quite easy, but it is about to get a bit frenetic.

There are many things I would like us to do, but the shortness of this break means we have to choose what to do and what to leave to another time.

Already, we have been booked to go to Tenerife which is a 70 minute boat ride from Puerto de las Nieves on the north-eastern coast of Gran Canaria, this is to go to Loro Parque and what a long day it would be. The bus picks us up at 6:10AM.

For a pound and more, these fakes

Meanwhile, we have concentrated on Playa del Ingles, a walk up to Yumbo Centre where the shops stock imitations and counterfeits of brands names made to look like original and properly sourced products with such sweet-talking merchants who would at a whim sell their grandmothers at a discount if it would leave them with a coin of currency richer.

On Saturday, we went to Maspalomas and walked some 3 kilometres up the promenade from the lighthouse to Meloneras where the competition from the somewhat isolated restaurants was brisk and almost aggressive.

Food cooked with calumny

In a stretch of hardly 100 metres we were accosted by waiters selling their fare so well by disparaging their competition. Our hands were filled with restaurant business cards that by the time we reached the end of the promenade, the last card handler quipped that the cards of the other restaurants were bigger, but in his restaurant, the plates of food are bigger, the quality fresher and much else.

It was all too much for me, I hate having food forced down my throat and most especially bargain food. When we turned round to walk back, I could not run the gauntlet of that crowd again, we walked that part in front of the restaurants on the beach. Phew!

Then Sunday, we headed for the beach negotiating the dunes following the red-marked pillars. It takes just about 30 minutes to make it to the beach from our hotel. For the very first time, I did get my feet wet in the sea, I might get more wet next time.

Holiday Snaps: Tenerife from Las Palmas

Early up and going

I seem to have settled into real holiday mode without wanting to tax myself with anything beyond sleep and some excursion.

The second book I picked up to read seems to be going at a page a day, though today, I have already managed 10 pages – appalling.

On Thursday, I was up at 04:45 for the early pickup to Tenerife Island, it arrived at 05:30 and after a few more pickups we made for the port of Las Palmas.

Abridged visit

My excursion was to visit Mount Teide, the highest peak of Spain before going to Loro Parque but the weather forecast, of high winds and rain clouds meant that was out of the itinerary. Maybe I should have switched to a visit to Fuerteventura Island, but that is for another time.

Normally, we would drive through the clouds towards the mountain and have clear blue skies above regardless of how dull the day is below on the island.

The ferry from Las Palmas was run by Armas and it was to last 2 hours rather than the Fred Olsen high-speed link from the North-West of Gran Canaria which was for 70 minutes and completely enclosed.

You had a breakfast snack, three outside decks from which to take pictures or breathe the fresh sea air and chairs that did really recline better, it was my fifth visit to Tenerife.

Doing other things

When we arrived at Loro Parque, I decided on visiting other parts of the island than seeing dophins, penguins, parrots and orchids again, you can only have so much animal entertainment, it is not like some band with a new album every now and then – the moves are tried and tested rather than versatile and innovative, to the first timer however, there is much to see.

I needed a full English breakfast in the afternoon and the New Robin Hood bar offered the choice of a Maid Marian, Robin Hood or Friar Tuck breakfast, I asked for the Robin Hood and ended up with the Friar Tuck which I tucked in with little to spare and ready to tip the scales at a terrifying number I cannot bear to view.

A walk round the black beaches and a few photographs, I returned to the rendezvous at Loro Parque and we made our way back to the port at Santa Cruz de Tenerife.

Weathering the return

Unlike the Fred Olsen embarkation point which is beside the port building we were quite a distance away but soon boarded the sea craft and reclined on deck chairs for up to 30 minutes after leaving port before the weather came in.

Included in our fare was a dinner buffet which was fine enough, the advertised Wifi connection on the boat was there but not beyond the boat itself – you find that these services have not yet reached a level of reliability to expect much.

It was past 23:00 when I got back to the hotel, there was a cold snack left in my bedroom but I was just too tired for much, in the end, I spent the whole part of useful Friday in bed and even did not go out at night – it was restful, let us see what today brings – 3 full days to go yet.

Voyage to the land of the friendly volcano

Tenerife Classica

Yesterday, I went on my third tour to the Canarian island of Tenerife but I wanted to do something different.

In my previous visits, I had gone to Loro Parque, known for its parrots, penguins, dolphins, seals, orca whales and orchids, I had done the general tour and the behind-the-scenes tour, but I felt there was more to Tenerife than that attraction.

A day trip to Tenerife from Gran Canaria is as easy and as difficult as it might seem but it could easily be a 20-hour day from when you are picked up from the hotel in the morning until when you are dropped off at night.

This tour was called Tenerife Classica and supposedly was to take you on a tour of Tenerife and up the Mount Teide which peaks at 3,717 metres above sea level.

Earlier or worse

The hotel had prepared an early breakfast for my wakeup call at 05:45 hrs and the bus pickup at 06:30, there were a few more pickups around our area of the island till we got to a rendezvous point at San Agustin where other tourists joined us and we had the first change of guides.

For the trip, I did not think the bus was that comfortable, I had the feeling it was going to be the main vehicle throughout the whole journey as was the arrangement for the Loro Parque tours I had been on before.

At Las Palmas we picked another guide who saw us to the port at Agaete where we boarded the catamaran ferry to Santa Cruz de Tenerife which takes 70 minutes.

Sea me or see food again

Honestly, I would make the worst deck hand, I have no sea legs, I dosed up on mints, closed my eyes and listened to classical music as the vessel rock to a rhythm that kept my stomach in churn of butterflies and moths for hours after.

How I had the constitution not to see my breakfast or last night’s dinner escapes me, but I was so glad that it was over when we finally arrived, I think many others fared a lot less than I did, my sympathies went to them – it was the roughest of all the journeys I had made to Tenerife ever.

Amen to the tour guide

We boarded another more comfortable tour bus and had another tour guide, we were changing guides like the changing of the guard, only we were not royalty.

We were told Tenerife was the largest of the Canarian Islands and as he switched between German, English, French and Spanish the musicality of his diatribes are nigh on a Latin mass without the incense.

In fact, each language was delivered with the rapidity and intonation of Spanish, he was well into the third language before I realized he had finished the first – no pauses whatsoever between the languages.

The Spanish have invaded

German is typically the first foreign language on Gran Canaria and Tenerife because the German are always invading these islands, it does not appear anyone is complaining, but the way the tour guide went on about the Spanish conquerors of the 14^th Century, you’ll be forgiven for thinking it happened yesterday.

Somehow, I have the feeling that Canarians still carry a sense of loss of pride and independence because of that and it have seeped down through the generations as a angst ridden association with mainland Spain which is some 2,000 kms up North.

In all we heard that Santa Cruz de Tenerife was the capital and Tenerife was the largest island, with the highest mountain, it became the refrain to the canticles of the tour narrative.

Mounting expectations

And so we made for Mount Teide, in fact, I thought we were going to climb it after a point, but the first realisation was that the mountain we used to see our drive-bys towards Loro Parque was not in the back yard, it was a good 54 kilometers into the hinterland land through forests to a moonscape terrain that fills you with bewilderment.

The first stop for coffee and conveniences was in the large humidifier, I correct myself, we were in the clouds which had a constant wetness as if it was continuous rain, no dehumidifier could survive an hour sucking the moisture out of the air, we were at just about 1,000 metres up and we all thought that was how it would be until we go to the top of the mountain.

About 200 metres above that we are in the pine and eucalyptus forests where we learnt that eucalyptus trees grow so far and that is why the bark gets naturally stripped off and they are a menace because they suck up so much water from the soil.

Unending sunshine

Soon we were in the glow of the sunshine, see Mt Teide from afar in its glory but without the winter snow cap, to one end we could also see the Izaña Astrophysical Observatory – Tenerife above the clouds boasts over 300 days of clear skies and sunshine – between Tenerife and La Palma they have the most concentration of observatories.

We never got to summit Mt Teide, it does have a cable car that can take you to the top but I suppose that comes as part of a tour for guests holidaying on the island itself, but we heard enough about Father Teide waiting to regale us, succour us and give us the pleasure of its beauty, to have gone to the summit would have belittled its mystique and been an anticlimax

Geology 101

But there was a moonscape around the mountain with lava flows stopped and recorded in time – my geology knowledge was updated as I realised that lava might flow like liquid and present a deceptively smooth looking surface, no could be further from the truth when it all solidifies, it is lots of rocks and big ones at that.

The Canarian islands are extrusions from volcanic activity that have occurred over millions of years and there are been more recent volcanic erupts, we were told the black looking lava flows were young at just under a thousand years and we could not for certain say the volcanoes were extinct – we were at that point introduced to the friendly volcanoes that have not erupted and disrupted lives for centuries.

I could not say I know the difference between calderas or craters, they all belong to the same kind of volcanic landscape but we go to the highest point we would at the cathedral and that was a view to behold – it was breathtaking as it was wonderful.

And the rest of the day

It leaves one amazed that people could visit the islands and be stuck between the beach, the hotel and the bar that shows familiar stuff one is used to at home when the beach is hardly the best expression of the beauty of the island.

I have gotten my dose of the sun already and would have to apply some suntan lotion to my bald head, it has so seriously been sunburnt I look like a character off Star Trek and I am moulting – Bah!

By the time we were back through the clouds to the South of the Tenerife where we were let loose in the tourist shops for 75 minutes, the day was far gone.

A stop over at the cartel restaurant offering Canarian fayre and cheap plonk was good enough, I swore off the plonk and did end up scoffing so much ice cream in one day, I’ll have to do purgatory.

The journey back was better, the sea was calmer and my stomach did not churn at all, I was dropped off at my hotel at 21:27 hrs and the dinner left in my room did not once appeal to me.

Pictures will be published in earnest.

To Tenerife - Loro Parque

To Tenerife at last

Visiting Tenerife today was a thrill, after all my fuss, it was still a day out to the zoo. The pickup to Agaete where we boarded a ferry was 10 minutes late but I must say that this trip was organised by the same company that cancelled the trip for Tuesday, late on Monday evening.

I would suppose there are empires in that organisation where one excels at incompetence whilst another department strives to make things happen – somehow booking direct and booking through a hotel tour representative can make a whole lot of difference, I still never found out why the tour was cancelled.

At a bearing from 310 degrees we set sail for Santa Cruz de Tenerife and it was all over in just about 70 minutes.

Loro Parque

On disembarking we boarded a bus and headed for Loro Parque on the western side of Tenerife, it was established in 1972 as a parrot aviary but has grown to include a larger variety of animals and it is the home all sorts of endangered or threatened species.

There is such a fascination for watching sea lions and dolphins perform, but we also had the added fun of watching orca whales. When we arrived in the Orca Ocean arena, the cameras zoomed in on me which was beamed out to the big screen with a balloon callout 'bald is beautiful' – I could only wag a finger at the prankster.

Hard entertainment

Sometimes, I wonder what it takes to entertain us. When we watched the Diana Ross tribute performance, each completed song drew polite applause.

A few days later we watched a Chinese acrobatic troupe and as each performance got a bit more difficult we seemed to be less appreciative of the last and were slow to applaud the next.

Imagine, the man was balancing on one end of plank which was placed on top of the round side of a cylinder and was using the principle of levers to flip bowls from the other end of the plank to the top of his head. He did it with three bowls at a time and then a cup and finally flipped a spoon into the cup.

Another performance was the legs of a chair each balanced on 4 beer bottles and the man doing handstands on the back and seat of the chair, he went on to balance another chair unevenly on the first chair and still do handstands but each consequent applause was grudging, I probably initiated the most appreciation for those acts.

A lady spinning tables with her feet on the table edges and obliquely, then going on to spin a colleague on a barrel, really awe-inspiring stuff as far as I was concerned.

Fascinated more by animals

So watching sea lions, then dolphins and finally orca whales do the same acts of jumping out of the water, going through hoops and splashing around, whilst being incentivised through frequent handouts of fish was in no way boring as if humans were to do the same thing, each repeated act still drew increasing applause.

Animals do repetitive things compared to humans doing unique things and we felt better entertained by the animals.

By the time I returned to the hotel, there was great consideration on their part of offer a cold buffet, but as the saying in Yoruba goes, the late night visitor would hardly have choices for the food laid before him – a salad and a bottle of cold water, you could not complain at all.

Tenerife tomorrow arranged by staff so good

Hard graft planning

It has been drama, disappointment and delight trying to arrange a trip to Tenerife, only determination and the exquisite service of the staff at the Riu Palace Maspalomas saved the day.

On Thursday, I tried to arrange a trip through LastMinute excursions and there was no one at the other end of the phone to sort it out.

I then went to a tour arranger on Friday who struggled to make the arrangement only to find out that I could not travel on the days I wanted and had to wait a week.

When we finally got to the detail, they would not pick me up at my hotel and the pick-up time was set for 05:31 in the morning despite the fact that their brochure indicated 07:31 – I eventually gave up on that arrangement.

A basic trip round the island was also too difficult for them to setup; it made one wonder what business they were in.

Arranged but cancelled

So, I returned to my hotel reception where there concierge was able to setup the VIP Tour of the island for Saturday and the trip to Tenerife/Loro Parque for Tuesday – today.

I dropped my keys at reception on Monday well after 15:00, but when I returned, there was a note for me indicating the trip had been cancelled.

I was not impressed and this was supposed have been arranged by another outfit called Ultramar Express – we were go nowhere either slowly or by express by all accounts.

No one could tell why the trip had been cancelled, that is not to say that it was also going to be an early pick-up at 05:35 in front of my hotel.

In the face of all that, I would have been able to have an early breakfast and a late cold dinner when we returned, but it did not happen and so my story.

They offered a simple Loro Parque tour for Wednesday which would have been just as good as a day out to the zoo, I wanted more, so I cancelled.

Service I cannot only praise

The manager however agonised about how to help, at one time I had the idea of going for a night to Tenerife and I went to see a travel agent recommended by the hotel – the travel agent was busy fixing a new air-conditioner so could not do anything till the afternoon.

As I returned to the hotel, the manager had already spoken to a tour director to see if I could join one of their arrangements to Tenerife that includes the Loro Parque, in fact, all had been arranged and it only required my assent.

He had the cash and all the necessary stuff ready when he came to speak to me and offered to introduce me to the tour director in my own time. I immediately took up the offer and it was all done in less than 5 minutes.

New pickup time – 07:20 on Wednesday and the guarantee of a late dinner when we return at just before 22:00.

Staff this good

You cannot get staff this good in any place but where they are well paid, well catered for and recognised as assets to the company – there is no doubt that it is the staff that creates the opportunity for repeat visits to these luxurious establishments.

I am utterly delighted and pleased; I do not expect to hear the tour has been cancelled but then, let us not tempt fate.

See More Gran Canaria

I am no croc

There is that risk of getting out for a holiday in the sun and ending up on a reptilian holiday. Crawl out in the morning and bask in the sun till it is too hot that you slither into the water to cool down and repeat the action again till the day is over.

Some might have a variation of that, which is to go from hotel to beach and then to favourite bar where all the dreadful home soap operas are on show the whole to to give you that home feeling.

I have always tried to escape the louche environment of Playa del Inglés to see more of Gran Canaria, get on a boat, get on a bus or call a taxi and see something different.

Out at sea

On Friday, I decided to get on a catamaran for a sail round the South of the island to a place where some of the passengers could get on jet skis or the banana boat.

My feet never touched the water; it is one of those situations where my sense of adventure is almost overplayed with the pleasure of being a spectator.

When I was asked, I said I preferred National Geographic, whilst a good number understood, it went over the heads of other listeners who I found out were in the hairdressing business – smart people with so much hair-do, even they would not get in the water.

As if I knew it would happen, with life-jackets and all, when they were forcibly dismouented from the banana boat with a deft manoeuvre, and everyone was in the water, not me, definitely not for me – but it was a very pleasant day.

Last minute last time

Getting the LastMinute excursion company to arrange two excursions was like drawing teeth, I could not get the days I wanted and when it appeared things were looking fine, their agenda had changed from what was in their brochures.

I wanted to do the Grand Tour which would have taken me round the island especially the North-West where I had never been and then the whole day trip to Tenerife and Loro Parque.

The first just was not getting far because I had to wait days and they would not pick me up from my hotel – I was having none of that. The Tenerife trip was to pick me up at my hotel at 7:31AM and then I was told it would be 5:31AM – I don’t even stir at that time for either work or travel.

Off on tour

In the end, I went to the reception of my hotel where their service to me and their longsuffering and patience with the operators yielded more dividend.

A VIP Tour for Saturday with pick-up at 8:15AM and a Tuesday trip to Tenerife for a 5:35AM pick-up – I suppose it would be a long day to say the least.

The VIP Tour pickup was 20 minutes late and it was an air-conditioned minibus, I had hardly been in it 5 minutes, and I was hyper-ventilating, I was cooped up in the back seat and feeling seriously claustrophobic, I had to ask if we were changing buses later.

I cannot help having a Lebensraum Complex, I like space, space to recline, space to stretch, space to breathe, eventually, as the trip commenced we realised why it had to be minibuses and not big buses because none of those would have been able to negotiate those roads in the hinterland.

Zigzag up and down

The trip organised by Zig-Zags Safari was a very professional setup (There is the X-treme Jeep Safari and the genteel minibus rides – I took the latter), there were 5 minibuses in the convoy and it could stretch up to 11 in some cases.

Using a minicab intercom system, the tour-guide Gary was in the 2^nd bus and it was all in English.

By the time we got into the mountains in the West moving East, I was on a slow moving roller-coaster crossed with a helter-skelter – we were zigzagging the roads as we when up and down, round mountains and at one time climbing 700 metres in 3 minutes.

It was a bare-knuckle ride, heart racing and pounding, ears popping and at least one person was ready to see his breakfast all over again.

At one point, we wished were was having a reptilian holiday, then you saw people mountain climbing and felt you should be channel-hopping with your duvet right up to your neck.

See more Gran Canaria

But, we had to pat ourselves on the back for seeing more of Gran Canaria and some of the disappearing ways of the people which include agriculture, architecture, culture, arts and crafts along with other indigenously significant historical facts.

In many cases, tourism is to blame for the decline of these communities, but then tourism keeps the island going, what needs to happen is more managed tourism in balance with keeping the essential historical issues of the island.

Gran Canaria is not only sun, sea and sand, there is a civilisation that stretches back centuries to be visited, discovered and appreciated.

The tour guide lamented the fact that people have been visiting Gran Canaria for upwards of 20 years and never been beyond the highly-populated beach resorts.

I intend to publish the pictures, I took of the interior and we would end up with a DVD of our trip too – what a day it was.