Incredible India: Without Internet Access, Koenig Inn is a Prison

My connection was down

When in a distant land, well away from friends and family there is one bond that we take for granted because we have taken it in trust and it factored into all the decisions we made to leave the comfort of our home for the adventure which might well be the one of a lifetime.

Away from those I know, I am four and a half or 5 and a half hours ahead of their own daily timeframe, it means ones bears it in thought that one will not call to speak in the morning because they will be asleep, neither can one during the day because the overlapping times of work mean the pleasantries of interaction are reduced to more business-like conversation.

The window of opportunity between my getting to bed and they having the time to chat is reasonably around 8:00PM their time which is just after midnight here or an hour later.

In terms of cost, we have found that Skype suits us best and that needs the Internet as the carrier, its availability is critically paramount.

A prison of life

The lonely world that is framed within the confines of the little room that is a prison of convenience for a month is opened up into a vast and limitless place through the Internet which serves as the beast of burden for email, social interaction, news retrieval and again a critical research resource that underpins the reason why we have left our homes for this place.

Whatever discomforts, nostalgia, loneliness or isolation is somewhat ameliorated with the feeling that one can through this invisible but tangible medium, touch the world and be in touch – at will and without let or hindrance.

However, this night will count as one of the least comfortable I have had in a long time, the darkness settled in figurative and literal sense at the doors to the world were closed like one were in a maximum security prison.

Freedoms lost

The guards knowing we should be free could not open the prison gates and we were completely constrained, our freedom lost and the silence of the night stilled to the hearing of sounds from outer space if ones ears were so attuned.

From about 9:45PM when I noticed, the wireless connectivity between my netbook and the wireless access point was fine but the wireless access point could not take me beyond itself into the world of the Internet – it was down.

An idea for partnership

The staff could not resolve the problem and there I was, cut off and thinking fast about what other alternatives were available at the loss of this service – none easily came to mind apart from one good idea – the need for a contingency plan which should come at no additional cost.

There are many hotels that are in the vicinity of my hotel, all broadcast the presence of their wireless access points, where the service in one hotel fails, there should be an arrangement between hotels to allow for guests in other hotels to hop on their systems whilst steps are taken to expedite repairs of the service we used to have.

A rotten moment

This must be the lowest point in terms of my sense of comfort; the absence of Internet access, the last resort is to switch the SIM card in my phone back to my home SIM card and roam – not the best but this situation must definitely not happen again, it just must not, again.

No, sooner had I changed my SIM card and began to roam, my 10MB of data was used up without having done much.

Thought Picnic: Thoughts in grief

Get the thoughts

The thoughts that crowd my mind continuously as events and activities of the days past occupy one to the absence of intimate or social contact.

It is an unhealthy existence in some ways, my big apartment protects me from the elements but does not protect me from my thoughts – I sit like a hermit rolling the thoughts around without pause or stillness – it is no meditation but that is what it seems like.

I think I am a private man; I come alive at work, in gatherings I could be quite reserved, whereas with strangers a conversation can begin and it could go on for hours if time allows it.

One needs to get out more for this kind of interaction because I am noticing that it is seriously energy sapping having to deal with things alone.

Person to person

In grief, one needs to talk, maybe one needs a hug, a sense of caring outside oneself can go a long way – many calls need to be made but how can one give comfort when you are self-comforted and how can one give succour from just being a loner of sorts?

Indeed, my dad has a point, companionship has its uses and benefits but I have grown up to eschew such communal essentials that the thoughts of those are too alien to contemplate for any length of time.

Even when I was very ill, I was the most vulnerable in need in such great help and even I employed that help quite sparingly – the comfort of being in my own home for days on end seemed to have a tonic effect for my recovery.

My neighbours and friends did a lot for which one is grateful but introversion and introspection in this very private person is most externalised in the writing and the expressions in words.

Mine for me

That surely is not enough, but change is probably going to be hardest thing to entertain; the relationships I desire are far from the norm, the companionships I crave are different, the love that fulfils is strange but the happiness it would bring is universally understood.

A hand to hold, a hug so bold, a kiss so brazen and a love that dare not speak its name – a dare for life and dear to live for – it is time to find and keep, no more unrequited love, no more fear to approach – Gosh! I write better than I would do, but the notice is out, there are things to do, this man must no more live alone.