Essential Snobbery 101: Attend for the experience or stay at home

Acrobats from Africa

On Wednesday, I had the pleasure of attending the Kalabanté Productions: Afrique En Cirque performance at the Aviva Studios, Factory International venue bordering Manchester to the northwest, courtesy of tickets from George House Trust.

This troupe from Guinea in West Africa brought to life the typical everyday life in West Africa, even though they represented themselves more as ambassadors of Africa than from a specific region.

The performance was full of African percussion and the versatility of the kora, a 21-stringed instrument common to West Africa, beyond which were dances and lots of acrobatics. Amongst the performers were two contortionists with freakish abilities that just astounded us with awe.

For me, it was a lovely, entertaining night; the innate African in me could not sit still as the percussion beats resonated, so you just had to move or rock in rhythm in your seat.

Arriving on African time

With everything African, certain African traits were presented with a surprising coincidence of our row of 16 seats in a section being populated by people seemingly of African origin.

However, my pique was with certain on my row who arrived over 30 minutes after the performance started, meaning we had to get up for them to get to their seats. The seat beside me was vacant for about an hour before the lady arrived, and the performance had hardly ended before she was the first to literally push her way through to leave. She probably should have just stayed home.

I do have my concerns about concert etiquette, though. I would attend a performance for the experience, in the moment. I might at times take notes, but I rarely do, except when I am attending for the second time, if the opportunity comes up.

The disruption of mobile phones

It has become the bane of live attendance to see many holding up their phones and recording the performance, obviously to relay to others that they were there, but I feel the quality of the experience is diminished by the distraction or concentration on their phones to ensure they get the somewhat essential elements of the performance.

The amateur recording of a performance would never meet the professional standards of a licensed recording of a performance with cameras at strategic locations and all the elements of zooming in on certain sections of the stage to highlight critical must-see actions.

Besides, in a dark theatre, the light or glare of the mobile phone recording events is both a distraction and an irritation to other members of the audience. Some concerts literally look like candlelight vigils, all phones aglow and in the line of sight of those behind trying to catch what is going on.

Come for the experience

In my view, this should be banned, you either have come for a live performance or you want to watch it on television at home. If indeed you need to encourage others to see the show, your word of mouth about the experience should suffice. If snippets of the show are necessary, the production company would probably have a professionally curated trailer of their performance to highlight what to expect; it is unlikely you can do better than them.

It might serve a purpose for you, and the best is to seek a photo opportunity with the performers after the show; that would be more unique and special than a bootlegged sneaky recording of a performance, whilst being an irritation to others. Thank you.

Essential Snobbery 101: On good manners and seats

Well brought up

I grew up in a different time, or rather, I was brought up differently, and I am constantly met with the shock of contemporary attitudes and behaviour that the worldview I inhabit finds quite grating.

The reason why the different time matters is almost irrelevant, because I see people of my age behave in ways that leave much to be desired, so it must be the different way that is more significant.

I do not believe that certain things should become old-fashioned, be consigned to conservativeness and passed off as traditional values. Self-awareness and consideration of others still matter a great deal; besides the fact that manners should never be negotiable, they must be acquired at all costs and deployed at every opportunity.

Give up your seat

Yet today, as I sat on the train, an elderly lady boarded the train at the next stop carrying some luggage; it did not appear she was helped on, and there was no place for her to sit.

Even though I use a cane, I could not watch her standing, holding on for dear life as the train began to move. The many able-bodied people around us remained decidedly oblivious of her out of ignorance, the absence of breeding or sheer selfishness.

I got up and gave her my seat, which is what any well-taught person is supposed to do, at least, in the different way I was brought up. It was another two stops, some 20 minutes later, before a seat became vacant for me to sit down.

Make all allowances

Meanwhile, further along the carriage, there was a heavily pregnant woman who, in another time, would have been ushered to take a seat somewhere in the carriage. Someone would have initiated the move and asked another to give up their seat. The person giving up their seat, seeing the condition of the woman, would have happily obliged.

However, this appears to belong to a bygone age, people rush for priority seats, literally tripping up less able people in their race to be comfortable at the expense of seemingly more deserving people, and they hardly ever care when reminded of the fact that the notices do state an incontrovertible fact.

On good manners

Ladies are surprised when I take off my hat to chat to them, some might even take offence if you open the door for them or if you ascribe to the chivalry of ‘Ladies first’. Other bad habits like coughing and yawning without covering your mouth, eating on the street, elbows on the table – the list is endless, make one think we have become a global village of the uncouth and uncultured with air, grace, comportment or finesse.

Rough on all edges that we rub people up the wrong way, quite an appalling reflection on society today. It is not like one wants to rewrite Debrett’s guide on manners, etiquette, protocol, address or dress, but some things are just so, so as to really separate us from the wildness and chaos of the animal kingdom.

As I disembarked at my station, the elderly lady acknowledged me and mouthed a thank you. I tipped my head and smiled. We both knew there was a world we once knew that was fast disappearing from our present-day experiences.

I am saddened writing this, but we have attained, with the absence of certain aspects of social schooling, a level of inconsiderate selfishness where manners are the exception rather than the rule. A shame indeed.

A library of society

The library

Getting a place to sit in the magnificent Amsterdam Public Library [1] is not an easy task especially when you arrive in the early afternoon.

The library offers free wireless internet access after registration; there are banks of computers on most floors with Apple iMacs and Windows PCs, a restaurant on the ground floor and the one the 7^th is a buffet restaurant of ingredients that get cooked for you after selection.

It is serious as it is social with seven floors, there is no doubt that the examinations season is round the corner, I have seen similar copies of high school examination preparation materials on desks as students swot and sometimes cram to get the best scores.

The people

Literally everyone one of them has a laptop, most of them are Apple iBooks but you can see other popular brands too. One even had an iPad and as he typed away at the screen, I thought about the luxury of fads without the feedback of clicking keys.

Everyone seemed to have one musical device of the other and the headphones were probably best suited for a recording studio, I doubt any were listening to anything classical.

Their scientific calculators are huge; it makes you wonder what new calculations have entered the curriculum since I left high school 3 decades ago.

The culture

They quite conveniently ignore library decorum especially when groups of friends band together in discussion that rarely pertains to the purpose for which they have come to the library.

Indeed social development is just as important as educational prowess, many people form their life-long networks from their teens and that matters a lot amongst the Dutch.

I have many a time lamented the fact that the Dutch with all their tolerance rarely have a social circle that extends beyond that which they formed since year dot. The ones that do in most cases have really broken free from the structure and plunge themselves into other settings by reason of having travelled and lived in other countries or also acquired for themselves foreign partners.

The annoyance

Yesterday evening there was a rather raucous group at my reading table who at one time reckoned they were being a nuisance when I looked up. However, some 20 minutes after, a particular lady who just could not keep it low got to me.

I banged my fists of the table in exasperation, reminded them they were in a library, conceded they needed to have discussions but admonished them to be considerate.

Now, I was not against their communicating but it fell completely silent and they appeared to self-censure each other when the decibel level rose and eventually they left.

The inconsiderate

Whilst I was minded to get the staff to deal with them, I felt it was important to gauge their reaction to my protest before seeking additional help.

Again, in settings like this, one is not sure if they will take kindly to being told off, some people just cannot bear to be told to exercise a modicum of civility.

In the end, not an apology was offered, not that it mattered, and the expectation of good manners will always leave me utterly disappointed.

Sources

[1] Openbare Bibliotheek Amsterdam

Amsterdam Public Library – Facts and Figures