My week in nut's hell

What a week

The events of the past week have been too difficult to put behind me, as I have ruminated over what I or we could do for my friend to help him, his family in Europe and myself have had thinking caps on trying to identify how to break through the iron curtain of denial and indifference to retrieve by force the man we once knew.

On Monday, I learnt that he had not caught the flight back home from Sunday and he was to have caught on Monday. My concerns were various, most critical being, if the police got involved, I would have been the last to see him; and he having left my home under a cloud would not have made the best reading for any suspicious mind.

Then, I heard he still was in Amsterdam on Monday night but would be catching a flight on Tuesday - thankfully, he arrived home safely on Tuesday, but clammed up to everyone wanted to hear the excuses.

Just as I was about to sigh in relief, I got a letter from my phone company that all international and premium calls would be barred from my phone - this could only be that unusual activity had taken place on a line that they would have had 7 years of records to and they would have noticed a pattern that was completely out of character with my usage.

An incalculable price

I cannot begin to imagine what other price I would have to pay for this whole saga, but this is all now a small thing, compared to the pressing issue of addressing a matter that could slip irretrievably out of our hands.

Meanwhile, I have kept contact with the family because comparing notes between the familial and the friends might help us home in on the core issues.

The bedroom has not seen much activity apart from the fact that I saw another little wad of money which I doubt I put on my shelf, all of which cannot begin to cover the cost of damage to material, goods or friendship.

One email would arrive in my friend's mailbox shortly, not to shoot him down but to awake him to the fact that if he needs help, we are all around to help out; however, this would require some really harsh decisions.

I could not spend the weekend in the house, I am still a bit distressed about it all, so, a long weekend in Antwerp is a breather most welcome.

The horns of a rampaging dilemma

My home, a sty

I returned home from work and this was the first time I saw my house in such a state, I mustered the depths of calm and patience to take in the sight.

I have a guest, a friend of about 15 years who had since returned to Africa from Europe and is one whose peers hold in quite high regard, he is invited to present a paper in Brussels.

My bathroom sink had underwear which first looked misplaced till it was apparent that it had some excrement in it - wrapped it in a bag and binned it - my toilet was in such a state with brown stuff all over the place, walls, sink, floor and toilet bowl, I must have walked into a horror movie.

I have a cleaner, but this could not wait, I was down to the shops, got every cleaning disinfectant on the shelves and was on all fours scrubbing and rubbing - very annoying - my guest just ignored the whole thing - at least since yesterday he has been quite unwell - I have been told.

Oh my, what happened?

Then my kitchen, a casserole I had made the night before was exposed; the serving spoon on the floor, some of the stuff strewn over the table and floor, and surely, this is not on.

The kitchen sink and table tops red stained, probably with wine, when I noticed that in the space of 9 hours when I was at work, a bottle of port, one of sherry, a magnum of champagne had been consumed - makes me wonder, is that enough to make it seem my home has been hit by a cyclone?

Now, whilst I like fine wines, my consumption of alcohol is minuscule, even if I had to take a wine-pairing multiple course dinner, my consumption would not come to more than two glasses of wine and is quite enough.

It is a matter of principle and considered safety that I never drink alone, I have a well-stocked cellar but only for when occasion presents itself.

Now, for two nights since my friend returned from Brussels, he has ensconced himself in the bedroom without any useful interaction.

Familiarity has begotten contempt

There is no doubt that the friendship is being treated with utter contempt, I can handle that, however, I do wonder if I should express my disappointment, check him into a hotel for his last night or endure what is just a wallowing sow for another 36 hours?

Really, I have never been met with such a trying situation before and I do wonder if my friend does need to seek help for a seeming drink problem which might be contributing to the unfamiliar and unwarranted abuse of my hospitality - I am of the good mind of making all the wine bottles in my wine cupboard disappear before the sun is up.

Much more has happened, but those I can handle, this, well, I either need more patience or a rage of absolutely righteous indignation.

We can agree that no such invitation would ever be extended to my friend again, that is if this episode would survive our long acquaintance.

I am caught on the horns of a rampaging dilemma.

Professional reputations in a rotten job

False facts force fiddles

Angst is never an emotion or state of mind one finds oneself grappling with. In professional life, it rarely ever features, since I project myself as an expert and authority in the field where the knowledge goods find a market.

This really became a dilemma when I took on a short term contract to help sort out some problems which were affecting the technical relationship between my employer and their client.

It so transpires that over the last year, they had been discussing the execution of this project such that many questions were asked, some answers were given and we can agree that some of those answers would make a jury take a negative view of evidence before them.

Business lies

Basically, there were misrepresentations which lead to certain conclusions that formed the basis of executing the project.

Businesses embark on projects hopefully as a business improvement or enhancement exercise knowing that every eventual benefit might incur an initial cost in resources, time and money.

In this case, the client already had a ceiling of costs for a project which under nominal circumstances would have had an implementation floor well above the projected and agreed costs.

GF≠C is ideal

For some, that would be a bargain, but we all know that even if your service terms were Good, Fast and Cheap, juxtaposing them would provide different results.

+        Fast and Cheap is usually not Good (Bad)

+        Good and Fast is usually not Cheap (Ideal)

+        Good and Cheap is usually not Fast (Acceptable)

In this case, the project manager having presented the ideal plan had the Sales People pare it down to the acceptable and they all ended up with a bad agreement, I now have to square that up to the ideal.

With the wealth of knowledge and expertise I bring in as well as being a resource to execute the project, a lot can be done, but none of which does well to approach the fundamental implementation floor worthy of any recognition.

My role however was one of either trying to resolve the prevailing problems or a complete re-design of the project, the former had mileage, and the latter was long dead in water.

In resolving the problems, some radical action had to be taken which for posterity would have my name attached till when some sensible assessment of what went wrong initially and that is corrected.

Speak for me - forever

I could speak for myself whilst on the project and in the company, but once I leave, having done what the customer required though that requirement falls way below my professional judgment, it makes one wonder who would speak up for me when another expert reviews the project further down the line.

My concerns for that lead me to consider walking away from the project.

I sought succour from mentors and friends which simply confirmed the notion that it would always be my call.

Weighing the consequences of protecting my professional integrity or probably pride by walking away, or trying to make the best of a bad situation by making myself available as a resource to implement what the customer wants with the best expertise I could offer.

Just not on

In choosing the latter, I had already remonstrated about the issues that were raised in negotiating the terms of the project

+        from the false assertion that they had experts of my calibre who had executed the project not only badly but wrongly;

+        the apparent lack of candour where claim and counter-claim pervaded the atmosphere till the real truth emerged in a forum of all parties;

+        the quest to cover-up the mess by subterfuge rather than owning up to the mistakes made

Those amongst many other little but significant issues have been addressed and would need to be reviewed again as this project hopefully comes to a close.

Egg-spurt needs egg on face

The only annoying bit remains that the in-house expert who has expertly made a hash of this project has not accepted the folly of his actions enough to leave this to the hired expert to first resolve and then handover with the opportunity to learn.

For me, it is a humbling experience which in other circumstances would have seen my walk out, the risk of humiliation looms but is distant from the fact that they all well know that I kicked up a right old fuss.

Once again, I thank my mentors and friends for their advice, soothing words and useful guidance, they are friends, indeed.

This time has been instructive, the people quite challenging and the project, well definitely interesting. Go figure!