Of bigger balls of discomfort

We, the vulnerable

Each visit to the hospital presents an opportunity to observe humanity at its most vulnerable and, at times, a few at their most irascible. It also showcases the society in which we live.

Illness does not selectively affect individuals based on class, race, status, or identity. There may be susceptibilities indicated by certain groups, but these are often ill-defined.

We all visit the hospital because something beyond our control has afflicted us, and we require assistance against whatever the onslaught may be.

Do the shower inspection

In the spirit of Men’s things, while I was in the shower on Saturday, I noticed my left testicle was swollen. Signs of this, the day before, led to the feeling that my underwear was a size too small. However, I ignored that indication throughout Friday until a shower inspection raised cause for concern.

We should all be doing a shower inspection and checking ourselves, examining our intimate parts for anything unusual. Men should check their testicles for swelling, hardness, lumps, redness, or heat, just as women should examine their breasts likewise.

As breast cancer can affect both men and women, we must also be mindful of assessing those parts too.

English as standard

While I acknowledge that during my time in the Netherlands, I never became as Dutch as might have been necessary, English was generally the language of transaction in business and all matters aside from government and politics.

In Dutch hospitals, the professionals, typically multilingual, would switch effortlessly to the preferred language of the patient.

I remember a 91-year-old Englishman in my ward nearly 16 years ago who had lived in the Netherlands for 50 years, and despite his fluency in Dutch, you could still hear that polished English accent from a bygone era.

How do they cope?

However, I was taken aback by the number of ethnic minority couples who visited the Accident and Emergency Department on Tuesday morning, who could barely communicate in Pidgin or broken English. Each relies on their spouses to register and relay their issues to the nurses and, eventually, doctors.

I was left pondering how they navigated society and how isolated some might feel. Whether any would receive a proper or complete diagnosis without the ability to speak for themselves is a concern. Imagine those with a rather stifling conservative background having to speak to strangers about intimate matters affecting their partners. Are the words for those issues the same ones we can comprehend?

Much as many of these couples were parents with children who had been schooled in English, exhibiting local and foreign accents confidently and expressively. No one under the age of 16 could act as a chaperone, due to safeguarding regulations. Invariably, it is probably for the best that children are not answering for their parents regarding their sex lives and similar subjects.

Bide your time

From triage through registration, basic checks, blood tests, and consultations that led to an ultrasound scan and ultimately a diagnosis. Everything pointed to inflammation, for which I was prescribed antibiotics.

At A&E departments in UK hospitals, arriving is the easiest part, even if you were blue lighted into resuscitation. Alright, perhaps that’s an exaggeration. One can expect to be there for a conservative estimate of six hours.

Take a book, a bottle of water, a phone charger, or better still, a power bank; let your patience be tested but do not suffer for the privilege of free healthcare at the point of access, regardless of status.

The clear and present danger of irresponsible cyclists

The bane of powered vehicles

Beyond the terror of devil dogs that I wrote about recently, it is electric-powered bicycles and scooters that have become a menace on our roads. That fact that the human-powered element of pedalling or scooting means that the concentration of thought and process in the engagement of muscle is diverted elsewhere and that, in itself, becomes a kind of distraction.

Blog - Opinion: Public safety is paramount regardless of your cuddly dog

The bicycles or scooters whiz off at speed with the riders literally oblivious of the responsibility and due concern that comes with being in charge of such a vehicle. That and their inclination to ignore traffic and road usage rules along with pedestrians being terrorised on the pavements makes them a clear and present danger to others and themselves.

An uncaring cohort for safety

What baffles me and I have written about this having lived in Amsterdam is how riders can ply busy streets or pavements at night without lights. Usually, the riders are in dark clothing, and you are usually unaware of their proximity to you until they are so close, you have to avert a collision if they are totally uncaring.

I could go on about my concerns and bugbears, but the reason for this blog is a rather close encounter for which I should curb the urge to be dramatic even as my recollection of it leaves me in a shudder as to how it could have been a lot worse and it does not bear thinking of apart from lifting up hands in gratitude for being spared an inauspicious ending.

What just happened?

I was at a bus stop leaning on the inside wall of the enclosure with a foot out speaking to my friend on the phone, when suddenly I had a knock on the outside of my left knee and sudden surge of pain over the top of my midfoot, the shock with a directed gaze to a young man crashing off his bicycle as he came to find out if he had hit me.

“Are you crazy?” I shouted out at him, a bystander who saw everything was totally nonchalant that I wonder if I had taken the full impact of that collision whether she would have bothered to help or call for any help. She was in a Tesco supermarket top, my views of that are best left off this blog.

An entrenched lawlessness

However, the lawlessness of the whole encounter and how one was ill-equipped to find any sort of redress and sanction just left me wanting to nurse my bruises than do much else as very little would have been learnt by the cyclist as I upbraided him.

He was riding a hired electric bike on a busy road against the traffic, and he decided to cut away unto the wide pavement to take another shortcut over the pavement to ride against the traffic avoiding an intersection or junction. As he tried to mount the pavement, he hit the kerb, lost control, and ran into me and crashed some 10 metres further on before coming over to find out if I was okay.

He would have done this weaving through obstacles and dangers, hardly slowly down to assess the full risk of any manoeuvre, a young exuberance overwhelming any sense of caution or responsibility to others, daring to do rather than caring at all, I could have lost it and decked him, but that was unnecessary.

But for the grace of God

As he left to pick up his bicycle and ride away, I remembered I was still on a call with my friend and continued the call. However, when I thought about it this morning, this chap is probably doing an electrically propelled 30 mph or 48.2 km/h. A full-on collision or if I had been pinned against the wall of the bus stop could have wiped me out, needing hospital care. It was a close shave.

There is no doubt that the law has to catch up with this the road usage of electrically propelled bicycles and scooters, I also wonder of a new set of rules need to be written and there is no doubt that policing with the strict enforcement of the said rules is essential for adherence and deterrence. There have been too many accidents, some resulting in fatalities and many attributable to irresponsible road usage. It needs to be addressed with alacrity.

You can be minding your own business and out of nowhere danger invades your space, it is the grace of God that keeps us. For that, we are very thankful.

Knowing not to be confident in your incompetence

So, you think you are good?

When you think about it and discretion prevents you from speaking the truth just to spare their blushes or a feeling of despondency, many people are not as good at what they think they are good at. Aspects of expression or demonstration that they deploy can be so bad that if you do not have the form of words of a gentle let down, you endure the spectacle and move on.

Talk about dancing and everyone has a way they believe they can move to the music and too many of us do think we are good dancers with dare I say, a sense of rhythm, but when observed by someone else that has an idea of what dancing is about, they probably would not shove you off the dancefloor, even if what they are observing might haunt them thereafter.

In confidence, we perform

This kind of thinking comes with a sense of bravado or even confidence, but confidence is not expertise even as expertise might well exude confidence. Like when a colleague demonstrated a scenario to Microsoft to refocus our minds on what we were trying to resolve, I was more than impressed by the clarity of expression, the detail of the process, and the explanation of the issue that no one could be in any doubt about what we wanted doing. This man is good, I thought, he knows what he is doing, and he is doing it well.

Then I think of certain other situations like when someone was approached in a sauna by a quite self-assured masseuse, or so they thought, then whatever informed the person to take the offer I cannot tell, but from the first touch, as was narrated to me, there was nothing in the realm of all possible massage techniques in what they did, the hands were rough and might well have been attuned to masonry or at a smithery, but not on any human body, a polite and abrupt stop was called for.

If I were in that situation and that person could read my mind, and I am glad my mind is not such an open book when it should be, the person would have sought therapy at the ready excoriation that could have proceeded from my lips, and that would have been tempered with structure and consideration because my sobriety to a large extent bridles my tongue.

The conceit of stupid

It leads me to another aspect of confidence which is in fact, folly, and this is of people who use their phones whilst in control of a vehicle or when walking in a crowded area. Too many think they can concentrate on one thing while doing another.

Whether it is writing or reading messages on a phone, or listening to and participating in a conversation, these are serious distractions from driving and walking through a crowd that requires high levels of concentration and spatial awareness these other activities divide your concentration and might consequentially make you bad at all the activities, even if excellence could be demonstrated in your doing one activity at any one time.

I prefer to concentrate

Maybe people are good at multitasking, or they believe they are, I would rather time slice, apportioning time to one activity and then the next, frequently reviewing what I am doing and gauging the progress, keeping tabs on how much is accomplished for each of the things being done. I prefer to concentrate and that is why when I am out and about, I would only take calls on my phone if I have found a place to sit down.

On my walks too, I see a lot of people with their headphones or earbuds on, music going into their ears at volumes that exclude externalities they will encounter whilst jogging. As I have seen too many inconsiderate road users, drivers, cyclists, those on e-scooters and even plain pedestrians totally unaware of who is around them or what is happening around them, accidents happen.

I stopped wearing headphones and listening to music whilst out walking a long time ago, because I needed to know, see, and hear what was going on around me for my own safety and in consideration of others.

In a world of the world

Even when riding bicycles in The Netherlands, I only had an earpiece in one ear, for the same reason that I wanted to know what was happening around me. You cannot just feel you are in a world of your own when you are out in the world.

We all have mutual public space responsibilities to prevent walking into each other along with preventing other mishaps. I commend those who have amazing abilities, but I would err on the side of caution, when I see overconfidence, that person is probably prone to error and invariably puts us all at risk. 

We should get better at what we claim to be able to do, but also understand the limits of our abilities, however, more pertinently, seeking to impress when what you do is hardly impressive, neither helps you nor the others you are trying to impress. In jocular or informal and private settings, maybe, but otherwise, in public, formal, professional, or serious situations where lives and much else could be impacted, curtail and curb your enthusiasm.

Opinion: The utter dehumanisation of Kim Wall

Responsibility is not outdated

This matter cuts to my heart that I am almost left speechless, yet, I find it is a topic on which I must comment even in the jumble of thoughts that afflict me.

A female freelance journalist researching a maverick submariner, met up with him one evening, apparently went on a submarine ride with him and unfortunately never returned home. The following morning, the submariner was rescued from his sinking submarine and as to the whereabouts of his guest, he said he dropped her off on an island the night before.

Eventually, the submarine was retrieved from the waterbed where it sunk and there was still no sign of the journalist, however, it was impossible not to hold the submariner responsible for the disappearance of the journalist, since he was last seen with her.

How you deal with accidents matter

Then, just as mystery piled on misery, a human torso washed up on a beach just as the submariner changed his story to suggest the journalist came to her demise by accident on submariner and he buried her at sea. The said torso, yet to be confirmed to be the missing journalist was apparently deliberately mutilated.

The journalist was Kim Wall, aged 30, Swedish and quite well accomplished, the submariner was Peter Madsen, aged 46 and Danish. [Independent]

This narrative disturbs and perturbs me on so many levels, accidents do happen whether by commission or omission, but most particularly, there must be a greater sense of responsibility at play. Kim Wall was the guest Peter Madsen on his possibly precarious vessel, it meant on a basic level that he had a sense of great duty to ensuring the safety of his guest and an all-consuming responsibility to ensure that he delivered safely back to shore after their meeting.

How reaction indicts you

Whatever, the accident might have been on the submarine, Peter Madsen should have come back to the surface if the submarine were submerged and immediately contacted the emergency services to come to the aid of Kim Wall to determine with certainty the mortal danger she faced after the said accident.

If Peter Madsen could not have delivered Kim Wall alive to shore, the basic sense of awareness of his responsibility should have been to bring her body back to shore and contact the police and her next-of-kin, ensuring a proper investigation of the event would lead to possibly acceptable conclusions.

I cannot speak to the state of mind of Peter Madsen, he was utterly irresponsible, his conduct extremely reprehensible, and his actions absolutely contemptible. That he did not readily assume responsibility for the safety of Kim Wal that he lied to deflect blame is not only cowardice, it presents a clear disrespect for the person and dignity of Kim Wall whether living or dead.

This was unforgivable

However, what shocks me to the core is how on Kim Wall’s death in his care, he arrogated to himself the right and authority to dispose of her body at sea without any reference or consultation with any of her family or friends. If that is not one of the greatest acts of gross inhumanity ever observed in recent times, I wonder what is.

Peter Madsen’s inability to immediately recognise the gravity of this criminality, for there is no other word to begin to broach this matter with any depth, is beyond belief. Whilst the death of Kim Wall might well have been an accident, for we do not know what happened aboard the submarine, one cannot divorce this matter from the violence against women that continues into death by the desecration of her humanity through throwing her into the sea like some dead fish.

Nothing Peter Madsen did can be found excusable, I cannot find anything defensible in the whole matter and it is necessary that justice for Kim Wall be found in visiting the full force of the law on Peter Madsen without mitigation. He was evil and grotesquely so, such as his ilk must never walk the streets where the civilised walk again, he is barely human and belongs in permanent sequestration for the safety of all. He deserves no mercy, not in the slightest.

Nigeria: Every reason to believe our airspace is not safe

These are not coincidences

I find myself trying to juxtapose the stark realities with the press briefings of bluster and vacuous lip service to performance and efficiency that dogs our aviation regulatory organisations in Nigeria.

In the aftermath of two events, a fatal crash in Lagos with flight 5N-BJY operated by Associated Aviation and flight 5N-JRM operated by Kabo Air in a near-miss, in Sokoto, the Aviation Minister insisted that the Nigerian air space is safe. [5N-BJY – Aviation Safety Network] [5N-JRM – Aviation Safety Network] [Daily Times]

Lapses in compliance

Along with the unfortunate, ‘Act of God’ comment posited by the Minister, in another report, she suggested broadly that there were “operational lapses and non-compliance with the policy”.

“What we did by suspending Dana’s operations is not making scapegoat of anyone. To suspend means that there must be operational lapses and non-compliance with the policy but it is always in tandem with international practice.” [This Day Live]

In the same report, she alluded to shared responsibilities and possibly gaps, and then she touched on a diverted return of another flight because the destination airport was closed as if either no flight plans were posted or other extenuating circumstances meant the trip could not be completed.

Having excoriated the people who have questioned reforms in the aviation sector, the Federal Government “also insisted that the safety and security of the sector cannot be fully achieved without funding.” The question then is whether there is adequate funding to ensure the safety and the security of our airspace.

The people in charge

The Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority (NCAA) is empowered with “the Authority to regulate Aviation Safety without political interference, but also to carry out oversight functions of Airports, Airspace, Meteorological Services, etc. as well as economic regulations of the industry”. [NCAA]

Under the safety oversight functions of the NCAA, it is important to understand in detail what the NCAA does in Nigeria, the detail of which I have lifted from their website.

In Nigeria, the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority (NCAA) is the apex regulatory body, overseeing the activities of all airlines and their pilots, engineers and cabin staff, airports, airstrips and heliports, navigation aids, all service providers including the airport authority and the air traffic service provider, aviation training institutions, etc. NCAA watches over the entire industry. Its role can aptly be described as that of "general overseer" or "referee:' For want of a better sobriquet, NCAA has even been address as the "police" of the industry.

While all these are correct, NCAA is essentially a facilitator of compliance of aviation safety and economic regulations. [NCAA]

We are left in no doubt about where the responsibility for safety lies; it lies with the regulatory, oversight and policing operations of the NCAA.

Going in broke

Which takes us back to that question, the question of adequate funding, because another news story suggests that the NCAA is broke; the more serious allegation is that the NCAA inspectors take bribes; they are apparently taking bribes because of the non-payment of NCAA inspector allowances. [PM News Nigeria]

Now, there is no excuse for taking bribes to overlook the functions and the duties necessary to protect our aviation industry. From the basic checks through airworthiness of aircraft to safety procedures and all the elements of responsibility as stated by the Aviation Minister, we cannot condone the dereliction of duty leading to the unnecessary loss of lives.

What is key is that we must realise that there is a shared responsibility, there is a collective responsibility, pilots are responsible, operators are responsible, regulators are responsible, government is responsible and all these must work together otherwise there will be a gap in the system. [This Day Live]

Temptations and pressure

An unnamed NCAA inspector, talked of compromise safety, dwindling training, struggles to procure basic needs and much else.

“Aircraft inspectors’ allowances are not being paid as at when due, leaving us to the open temptations of bribe and compromise from corrupt and desperate airline operators who want their planes to fly at all costs.” [PM News Nigeria]

The source went on to say, “Some of us that are due for training overseas are asked to fund our training and come back for a refund after the training. This is absurd, and they keep saying they are broke.” [PM News Nigeria]

A crisis and great doubt

Taking all this together, we can assume as the very best there is a crisis in the Aviation Sector. The matter of safety is compromised by acts of men; those in management in the NCAA and probably the Aviation Ministry because the NCAA people cannot do their work without interference and inducement caused by not paying their allowances and not ensuring proper training.

This situation probably needs verification, but it cannot be left without investigation because it casts great doubt on the idea that Nigeria’s airspace is safe and the ICAO report that suggests Nigeria is way above average in compliance and regulatory management of her aviation industry.

At worst, we do have an emergency played out in the number of accidents and near misses that have made the news recently.

Related Blog

Nigeria: Acts of God in our Aviation Industry or Rank Incompetence?

Nigeria: Acts of God in our Aviation Industry or Rank Incompetence?

The power ignorant

I started this blog over five days ago and abandoned it after about 300 words because it seemed too difficult to write, but in another sense, it was not ripe for writing, it needed the incubation of time in passing and event to be ready – Now, I complete it with quite a number of links for reference.

Sometimes you wonder why Nigeria is plagued with a pestilence of elite in power that find ways to do the unfortunate, revel in the unmentionable and speak without consideration, emotion or feeling on matters that demand empathy, compassion and a sense of participation in our humanity.

An air of chaos

The last weekend greeted an air crash with the loss of lives on an Embraer 120RT Brasilia aircraft with registration 5N-BJY [Picture taken in August] operated by Associated Aviation in Lagos and a precarious event where landing gear tyres exploded on landing at Sokoto Airport (SKO/DNSO) of a Boeing 747-521B with registration 5N-JRM operated by Kabo Air. [BBC News] [Fox News] [Aviation Safety Network]

A former Aviation minister recently listed a series of air disasters over the last few decades that indicated issues with the aviation industry, its infrastructure, its management and its regulation, but I am not here to cover that. [Nigerian Eye] [Timeline - ChannelsTV] [Nigerian Air Accidents – Aviation Safety Network]

A siege mentality

My concern is with the inability of the current regime to recognise a serious and possible crisis with the aviation sector, assume responsibility that suggests an understanding of all the elements whilst implementing ideas, strategy, and plans to ensure that air disasters do not become the norm in Nigeria.

The government needs to emerge from its siege bunker and take a whiff of the air everyday Nigerians breathe whilst taking a sure grip of reality, coming out on the defensive to excoriate those asking difficult and uncomfortable questions of the Minister, the Ministry and other regulatory bodies is hardly the solution we need at this pressing time.

Safe to avoid?

In a news story yesterday, the Federal Government Insists Nigeria’s Airspace is Safe, I suppose if we ignore everything that has happened recently in terms of air crashes, one might be tempted to agree, but this is far from the truth. [Daily Times]

In aftermath of the crashes, we read of the immediate suspension of Dana Air’s operating licence; why they ever had the suspension in the aftermath of the June 3^rd 2013 crash promptly lifted remains a mystery. [The Nation]

By Monday, the Aviation Minister, Princess Stella Oduah, flailing and swinging with vehemence and fury, first dismissed her predecessor with the words to the effect that he was “a drunk and a drug addict”, and accentuated that with the view that his comments “had little bearing with reality”.

Then she proceeded to give us her version of the bearings with reality of the Aviation Industry. Starting with a lamentation about security, safety and funding; implying the inadequacy of the former; then cosmetics of airport architecture before brandishing an International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) assessment that gave Nigeria a 65% rating [61%] and position of the 12^th safest aviation space in the world. [Daily Times] [The ICAO 2013 Safety Report - PDF] [Leadership Nigeria]

Act of God unproven

On the accident itself, she said and these words below:

“We do not pray for accidents but it is inevitable. But all we do is to do everything to ensure that we do not have accidents. But is an act of God! Again, we do not speculate on the cause of accidents until that happens you can say this is the cause or that is not the cause.

But what is obvious and is the truth is that, in aviation there are shared responsibilities, starting from the man that carries your luggage to the man that make sure that your boarding pass is issued to you. And so the regulatory agency, the operators, the management, everybody has their responsibility and all must work in tandem for there to be an optimal, secured and safe aviation sector. And that is what we have been working.” [Daily Times]

The Aviation suggests accidents are inevitable [(Adjective) - certain to happen; unavoidable; (Noun) - a situation that is unavoidable.], then in the morass of the inevitability of accidents in Nigeria’s safe airspace, these accidents are apparently Acts of God [Forces of nature completely outside the realm of control of man, inexplicable and left in the helpless hands of fate.]

We must clearly understand what is an Act of God – “An event that directly and exclusively results from the occurrence of natural causes that could not have been prevented by the exercise of foresight or caution; an inevitable accident.” [The Free Dictionary]

For an air crash to be remotely termed an “Act of God”, there has to have been nothing humanly possible to avoid the accident by reason of foresight or caution, to which I would add warning or instruction.

Acts of pilots - I

The first indication of human error with respect to Sokoto Airport incident, suggest the pilot ignored instructions from Air Traffic Control to land on runway 08, the plane landed on runway 26 damaging Instrument Landing System aerials and thereby sustaining deflated tyres. [Leadership Nigeria] [Aviation Safety Network]

We can safety say that the Kabo Air incident that led to the suspension of the said pilot was no ‘Act of God’.

Acts of pilots - II

In addition, on the release of a preliminary report with respect to 5N-BJY, the Embraer 120RT Brasilia Associated Aviation operated aircraft crash in Lagos, the Cockpit Voice Recorder (CVR) and the Flight Data Recorder (FDR) warned the pilots of instrument conditions essential to safe take-off, which they ignored. [The Scoop] [AIB Preliminary Report - PDF]

These warnings included, three audible chimes then “Take-off Flaps…Take-off Flaps”. The report suggests, “This is a configuration warning that suggests that the flaps were not in the correct position for take-off and there is some evidence that the crew may have chosen not to use flaps for the take-off.”

As the crew, assimilated, understood, reacted and ignored these warnings, the report documents the following, from the aircraft automated voice “’Take off Flaps, Auto Feather’. Auto feather refers to the pitch of the propeller blades.  In the feather position, the propeller does not produce any thrust.” [Basics on Flap Aircraft - Wikipedia] [Autofeather - Wikipedia]

This report indicates that the pilots were aware of a whole range of circumstances that informed the need to abort take-off but proceeded to ignore the basic science of essential power for airlift and consequently crashed the airplane – this again was no ‘Act of God’.

We have problems

The week presented a catalogue of problems with our aviation industry in Nigeria which the Aviation Minister succinctly put forward as – “What is key is that we must realise that there is a shared responsibility, there is a collective responsibility, pilots are responsible, operators are responsible, regulators are responsible, government is responsible and all these must work together otherwise there will be a gap in the system.” [This Day Live]

There are gaps in the system, in fact, too many gaps that indicate poor regulatory oversight leading to knee-jerk responses after disasters. Then possible pilot training deficiencies exhibited in their ignoring air traffic control or aircraft instrument instructions; airworthiness and safety issues and a minister whose penchant for verbosity appears to demonstrate activity and performance but the evidence must always be in how safe it is to fly in Nigeria.

Honestly!

More pertinently, we cannot have a minister quick to suggest the inevitability of air disasters to ‘Acts of God’ when the reports suggest without equivocation that the most recent disasters are clearly pilot errors, which could have led to the loss of almost 600 lives in one weekend.

However, where we celebrate mediocrity, exertion without effect and incompetence as great achievement, we cannot expect the change we need in our aviation industry for the better and that is very sad, indeed.

May the souls of those dearly departed because of this rotten and atrocious dereliction of responsibility of all involved rest in peace.

Thought Picnic: Chronicling the sudden end of bicycle journeys

Bicycle accidents

In my first year in the Netherlands, I had 5 bicycle accidents. Some were avoidable but only two involved other parties. A tourist had just walked into a cycle path without looking, it was impossible to stop without hitting him.

As I got up, I was both apologetic and angry, though on realising his folly, he was more apologetic and thankfully, not too much damage was done to either of us. Last year, I had a similar accident, the lady coming out a shop just walked onto the cycle path without looking – there was just no way I could avoid her as I knocked her over, all her shopping splayed on the ground, I was not going at a high enough speed to be dismounted.

The worse accident I had wrote off my bicycle, the front forks holding the wheel were so bent backwards there wasn’t much that could be done to repair the bicycle. I was about to turn into a side-street and I did not see the cyclist coming towards me so we collided and that was the end of that journey.

In another case, this man on a scooter was definitely drunk coming round a curve and just came straight for me, that bicycle was completely written off too.

Not nice on ice

A few years ago, as I rode in winter, there was still some snow on the ground and one had to be careful to avoid the slippery icy parts. About 15 metres before my fall, I could already see myself having that accident, I do not know if it was prescience but I got to that bit of ice and probably did 5 metres of traction or lack of it after my bicycle and I were separated. Thankfully, the only thing that was bruised was my dignity and though there were onlookers none came to help.

Since then, I have avoided riding my bicycle in the snow just for the fear of falling and coming a cropper.

Yesterday looked fine enough, it was sunny, and though cold it did not appear to be freezing, so I got on my bicycle for a ride without much of a care about it.

I was just about 250 metres from home when I took a turn I usually take to on the long stretch of road that leads to my block, something I have done hundreds of times before but this time as I took the turn the tyres lost all traction and there I was on the ground, literally in the middle of the road.

They walked on by

I could not think of why I had an accident there as it took the best part of 10 minutes for me to get my bearings back, pick myself up and then get my bicycle. The two people who passed me must have thought I was drunk, but I don’t drink and none even cared to be concerned.

It bothers me because it is very unlikely I would see such a situation and never get involved, it is just not my nature to “Walk on by” but that is the community I live in and I have noticed that striking difference between Amsterdam and even Cologne to the South in Germany.

Having another look at the area, I saw the glistening reflection of what could only have been ice; innocuous and dangerous – it is what is known as black-ice, usually hardly visible on macadamised roads but treacherous at best, if I had fallen in front of a moving vehicle, their brakes would not have helped. That was close.

Fixing the damage

In any case, when I picked up my bicycle, I noticed the rear light had stopped working; probably the filament in the electric bulb had broken, then the handle bars were no more at 90 degrees to the front wheel – there wasn’t much I could do about that then and the carriage at the back of the bicycle had come off just below the back of the seat as if two bolts had been broken off.

As for the damage to my person, I was quite bruised in a couple of places around my legs but my left knee seemed to have bled through my trousers showing two big red patches.

I hobbled slowly to my home, chained up my bicycle and then inspected the bodily harm done. I did have methylated spirit but the big-baby in me could not contemplate the pain so I cleaned the wound with hydrogen peroxide instead.

Then I found myself riffling through my box of dressings, I learnt a lot about dressings a few years ago and now I was spoilt for choice. In the end I applied a silicone film to the wound, then an absorbent dressing and bandaged the knee. It is still a bit painful and I have a bit of a limp but I think I will be fine.

I should be back on my bicycle in a few days, I hope.

My bandaged knee.

I was asleep, I saw nothing

Motion-induced sleep

A crashing sound, a sudden jolt and I was woken up from slumber just like I was 27 years ago.

I am of the opinion that certain people never grow out of the sensation caused by rocking a child to sleep in a pram, put me in any moving vehicle and I would the king of the Land of Nod in minutes.

It was a weakness my father could not tolerate, a whack in the car and complaints that I am always falling asleep – no one considers that motion might be triggering a soporific effect – sometimes our parents never can try to understand why their children could be different.

The problem with this situation is that I have never been an eye witness to any accident in which I have been involved; I was always jolted awake to witness the effect.

The boss’ kid is a dunce

That day, I had been driven up to Agbara at the brewery for an interview as a laboratory assistant, well, it was not so much an interview, I already had the job, I was the son of the Chief Accountant, but all righteousness had to be fulfilled.

The joke was either going to be the son of the big boss was a dunce or the young boy is quite smart.

After answering questions like defining Boyle’s Law and Charles’ Law, saying a few things about pH and titration, I was introduced to the staff and asked to report for work on Monday.

Whack and bang

As we were returning home the driver ran into the back of a tow truck that was laden with a damaged car and our car was written off. It was our driver’s word against the other with the supposed witness as useless as not being there.

On returning from Las Palmas today, we went into the bus stop which has parking lots that the bus drives into and then has to reverse out before driving off.

I was already halfway into the Land of Nod when as the bus was reversing it ran into the side of another passing bus and broke two panes of glass showering some passengers with debris.

Thankfully, glass in vehicles disintegrate with some controlled order or respect, if that is the word to use; they were moved out of the bus to another, our driver had to file a report and soon we were on our way back to Playa del Inglés where I can say, I arrived safely and managed to keep awake through the whole journey – only just.

Saving my uninsured legs

Static I see

Having astigmatism in my right eye, I have learnt that my perception of distance and speed is very poor. It explains why I was useless at the tennis lessons I took when I was 8, my lazy eye working with my better eye just could not track the ball.

This knowledge also comes in useful when crossing roads, I would rather I saw the whites of the eyes of a driver approaching a crossing with an acknowledgement before I cross.

I remember vividly about 23 years ago; rather than walk the almost 1 km Isolo flyover with the 300m walk to the bus stop, I decided to cross the 10-lane Apapa-Oshodi expressway, everyone was calling out and I did not know I was centimetres from becoming a bloody rag-doll result of a horrific accident – I did not see the car that whizzed past the front of me.

In fact, I was once subjected to the socialist punishment of doing squats in public whilst pulling at my ears for crossing the same expressway during the Muhammadu Buhari’s War Against Indiscipline crackdown on jaywalking delinquencies.

That same crossing witnessed the possibility of religious unrest but for reason that prevailed, when a lady had her burqa ripped off by another man because she crossed seriously endangering the lives of her family that included two children, one strapped to her back.

Road crossings

My friends who drive, cross busy roads like they are still in their cars, I really take care of number one in these matters, I would rather use a pelican crossing, zebra crossing or some designated pedestrian crossing than skip like a listless buck across the road.

Sometimes I quip that my legs are not insured and since I still need to get around with them more often than not, I owe them a duty of road-crossing care.

However, I have feared for one thing and it happened this evening – pedestrian crossings with traffic lights but allowing for discretionary access to vehicles turning into a T-Junction.

Much as I have right of way, I still require that drivers notice me, they have to stop for pedestrians to cross and then even when the lights are green for pedestrians, and they can drive through if no one is present to cross.

I was crossing and this was after 3 cars had sped through, the 4^th noticed me and stopped, but as it stopped, the third car in line bumped into the second – the makings of a traffic jam and anything else that transpires.

No cause, real effect

Now, that accident happened because I was crossing, but the cause it was because the driver was not being attentive or the car brakes were defective – I did not witness the accident, so there was no need for me to wait around as an eye witness.

I was glad that the bump did not create a domino-cascade that could have affected me, sorry as I felt for the situation, I really could not throw a guilt-fit and feel at fault – just as the butterfly happily flapping its wings at one end of the world cannot necessarily be responsible for the tornado somewhere else – I am NOT the purveyor of chaos even if I happen to be coincidentally in the vicinity of the same.

In danger of becoming endangered species

Take my rage and give me peace

I have no rage, no, indeed I have no anger, if I had to curse; it would be the sound of clearing my throat to call to attention ears to my words.

I patently cannot stand people who have scant regard for road usage especially within traffic, this is even worse if this is also displayed on the cycle paths, many which traverse Amsterdam.

These cycle lanes are clearly marked especially those that allow two-way traffic, so it was with utter bewilderment bordering on panic that a man in oncoming traffic on a scooter came round the bend and much as I tried to avoid him, seeing that he was on my side of the cycle path ran straight into me.

It is by circumstance of good fortune that though he fell off his scooter, I came to no harm, but my front wheel was bent out of shape.

A drunk with a weapon

It was obvious for all to see that not only had he approached the snake bend at speed, he had not reflexive control of the scooter.

Evidently, the man was inebriated that when I mentioned police he was off at speed again, I only hope no one else got the brunt of this reckless behaviour.

I for one could not find an expletive to blurt out since they never feature in my expression. However, I noticed I had no concern for the fact that he having fallen might have come to harm.

Therein is the hardening of the libertarian, we speak up for people’s rights, but lose out when people exercise their rights without due consideration of the fact that they do not exist in a vacuum.

I had no presence of mind to take the registration number of the scooter, but then with the experiences I have had of the police, my subconscious could have intimated my intuition about ignoring the essential.

How a drunken man can be in control of a vehicle that could do 50 kilometres an hour and then get away from an accident he caused, with impunity, irks me no end.

Technically, I became a victim of a hit-and-run, I have no time for vengeance, I have time to get on with my life.

Ease my pain

Two nice ladies came to my aid, to soothe me, to calm me, to sympathise with me and encourage me, having witnessed the episode – like I did just about 16 months ago [1] – I was thankful, I walked away from this – the bicycle, I can repair, as long as I have spirit and body in wholeness and wellness to do so [2].

It is just annoying that I have to pay for damage caused by a run-away drunken twerp. That grates, I’ll get over it.

I put my bike in the bike-shed, got advice about how to get it repaired and then walked 6 kilometres back home – that was my healing, the cure that allowed me get home and not have trembling fingers, breaking out in sweat and hyper-ventilating because of another chance encounter with a cretin.

Far be it from me that I begin to develop the feeling of being an endangered species in the Netherlands. As I get home, scooters whizz past with that horrible whining sound just after 4am. Sometimes!

Related blogs

[1] Couscous from a bicycle

[2] Bottling anger